Rumor: Joel Parkinson to be dropped by ‘Bong!

Jack Freestone too! Off the books, allegedly, for 2019!

Joel Parkinson is not the kind of guy who would be at a place like this at this time in his career. But here he is, allegedly, though he cannot say the terrain is entirely unfamiliar. He is on the Gold Coast right now, participating in the World Surf League’s 2018 kickoff and, by all accounts, surfing well. But a rumor just floating past my ears as I picked up dry cleaning that his relationship with Billabong will end in 2019. Stablemate Jack Freestone’s too.

And he has certainly watched many of his friends leave, or be left by, longtime sponsors. He watched Andy Irons’ younger brother Bruce and Volcom part ways. He watched Kelly Slater and Quiksilver go on without each other. And now, if the whisper is to be believed, it is his turn. Still a young man, by some accounts, but the product of a different generation.

He traveled in the course of his career from the meticulous to the slime, witnessing the Association of Surfing Professionals become the World Surf League along the way and winning one of their world champion trophies in 2012.

But what now? What happens when an arguably young man reaches the end?

Politics?

I’ve always thought Joel Parkinson had a bit of the statesman in him or at least since the first time I spoke with him on Oahu’s North Shore. His voice is uncharacteristically high though he can be easily understood. Bogan is a language as natural as human breath, I’ve come to find. It is a chipped tongue in which the endings fill up the pauses, covering those gaps and gaucheries of conversation that embarrass Americans and the British. It’s a language whose inertia has remained on the plus side. It’s a language in which the voice runs to all levels and Joel Parkinson’s voice mostly runs very high.

I cannot remember what we spoke about but my memory has him as a statesman. And if it is true that Billabong is indeed taking his contract off the books for 2019 then I hope he runs for Coolangatta city council. I think he would do well there. I think his star would rise and he would someday be elected Prime Minister.

If not politics then what? The Mad Hueys?

Let’s discuss Jack Freestone tomorrow.

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KRIS
KRIS
8 years ago

the rumour has been put to bed. Or, as Joel would say…
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

2footchop
2footchop
8 years ago

a tale of two sites….
https://stabmag.com/news/jo…

E-Wing Fighter Pilot
E-Wing Fighter Pilot
8 years ago

Chas whoever told u this rumour got it dealt wrong. Haha

Samuel Hall
Samuel Hall
8 years ago

Anddd then they announce they’ve signed him for 6 more years.. I mean that’s pretty close to him being dropped right Chas?

Jazzy P
Jazzy P
8 years ago
Reply to  Samuel Hall

And chalk up another one to the invisible hand of the media

J H
J H
8 years ago

A surfer wouldn’t belong to the sponsor…just the WSL. They’d be paid some sort of salary commensurate with years on tour, etc., travel would be covered (get the jet fueled and ready!!!), equipment allowances, etc.

QuikBong, RipO’Neil, etc. Would sponsor each event as they do now but since they aren’t sponsoring surfers they are paying higher comp fees resulting in higher prize money and or more professional venues or even exotic locale (boat trip!!!).

Each company, in theory, then has the right to use any surfers likeness to ply their wares.

Obviously it’s a simplistic approach but if any of you bastards steals my idea I get 10%.

Student8888
Student8888
8 years ago
Reply to  J H

Steal your idea? Sorry buddy… but that’s already been done. – Dana White

Doobalachy
Doobalachy
8 years ago

Who needs heritage when you got occy, taj and iggy

Bob Driver
Bob Driver
8 years ago

Let Parko and all his Bong cash go manage his Rugby fetish… But who’s gonna pay the for all the Freestone / Blanchard dirty diapers? Baby Banks gotta eat!

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
8 years ago

Is it also a grave party foul when the Bong drops you?

bitter guy
bitter guy
8 years ago

not as grave as dropping the WeedMap

Doobalachy
Doobalachy
8 years ago

generational change, as Sophie said 3 or 4 more tubs, and airs higher than a 14ft half pipe, bring it on

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
8 years ago

Quik had a range of sheets, pillow slips and doona covers a few years back. They were fucking foul. If anyone got laid under one, I would be most surprised. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
8 years ago
Reply to  Eddie Haiku

Un flog worthy even!

Dee Walker
Dee Walker
8 years ago

BTW does anyone here buy “surf” clothes? other than the odd pair of boardies once every 2 years, cant remember the last time I bought a major surf brand tee

janeausten
janeausten
8 years ago
Reply to  Dee Walker

There’s a place in Perth mysteriously called “Watertown” (as it’s in the CBD) that houses Rip Curl and Quik outlet stores. You can pick up boardies and tees for less than Bali prices. The almost unbranded tees are ok, for 20 bucks. I’m a dad, so I don’t give a fuck what I look like.

surfmom
surfmom
8 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Yea no shame in buying mellow looking gear at heavily discounted prices.. take advantage of distributors inability to sell shit by buying season-before stuff far closer to what it cost manufactures to land the product. Anyone would be foolish to ignore this sad truth of the industry and pay full price for stuff. Where I’m from these outlets are plentiful. $10 tshirts, $20-30 boardies, $200 range name brand wetties..

Dee Walker
Dee Walker
8 years ago

lol what do you expect Billabong clothes suck. Nothing will save that shit company. their wetsuits suck too. I think they own xcel? They are pretty decent. Quik clothes suck just as much and their wetsuits are just as shit. Rip curl clothes suck even more than quikbong but their wetties are good.
surprised there are not more rider owned companies like Former. Not my cup of tea for clothes (above my cool threshold) but at least they are indy, rider owned.

Doobalachy
Doobalachy
8 years ago
Reply to  Dee Walker

Stop ya winging, I bet you wore them when you were a grommet

Dee Walker
Dee Walker
8 years ago
Reply to  Doobalachy

lol sure did

Tom
Tom
8 years ago

Parko just gunna drink piss smoke durries and run a surf school

Krill
Krill
8 years ago

Bong drops are the fkn worst.

channelbottom
channelbottom
8 years ago

My money says he releases an album of self-penned crooning ballads within 6 months.

Krill
Krill
8 years ago

Fkn sick of the commentary pushing alt break/mobile sites at evey event like it is even a remote possibility.

bitter guy
bitter guy
8 years ago
Reply to  Krill

yeah, North Point my ass, we all know its going to magically be main break again (don’t pan right, might see somebody getting blown out at the Box)

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
8 years ago

That’s a bit of advertising space that Billabong have neglected for years. You could get a couple of stickers on each of the cunt’s nostrils.

John's mowed lawn
John's mowed lawn
8 years ago

He could do a talk show podcast called Parkinson. Oh wait that’s taken. Bye Joel.

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
8 years ago

hahaha 5/5 for slipping in picking up dry cleaning, my cloths just get washed and..rarely.. but I do use softener.
On speaking bogan, well Chas you sure nailed that one too cunt! (not pejorative)

Arthur
Arthur
8 years ago

And drink a beer every post heat interview..


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