Weep: The forgotten original wave tank!

The pioneers left unloved on the sideline. But wait!

With all eyes turned toward Lemoore, California for this weekend’s Founders’ Cup let us take a few moments and weep for the wave pools that came before and did not capture CNN’s imagination. Let us think about that one pool in Dubai that produces two foot waves but doesn’t allow surfboards. Let us also remember Big Surf in Tempe, Arizona where Rick Kane won a drawing set plus a trip to Oahu’s North Shore.

They are all dead. Done. Washed up. Over. Financially bereft.

Oh.

Wait.

Big Surf in Tempe is hosting some fantastic concert series and let’s read about it real quick.

‘Tis the season for pool parties, outdoor music festivals, and events put on by local radio stations. And for events like ALT AZ 93.3’s first-ever Band Splash, which takes place this weekend at Big Surf Waterpark in Tempe.

The outdoor concert event, which is being put on by the local radio station on Sunday, April 29, will feature eight hours of live performances by a mix of indie and alternative bands, including Dreamers, The Unlikely Candidates, and Robert DeLong.

According to Alt AZ morning show host Mo Rodriguez, Band Splash came about because the station’s staff wanted to do “something unique and cool.”

“We were trying to do something different where it wasn’t just about seeing bands at a concert,” she says. “It was also about the experience of having fun with your friends and other things to do in between checking out bands.”

Son of a bitch. Are these bastards drafting off of Surf Ranch popularity? Is the pool made for the masses actually still valuable?

Shit.

Who’s playing Founders’ Cup?


Surf Fans Turn on Taj Burrow, Jack Freestone!

"Fuck bottled water!" say eco-warrior surf fans.

Hell hath no fury like a surf fan whose environmental conscience has been pricked.

Yesterday, the surfer-who-retired-too-early, Taj Burrow, along with Jack Freestone and Taylor Knox, posted an innocuous enough giveaway on his Instagram feed offering a dozen bottles of his company Villager’s “Electrolyte Enhanced PH Water.”

Now unless you’re really fucking stupid, you know that bottled water, and especially “enhanced water” is bullshit. A tax on the dumb.

Who else pays three bucks, or five, for a bottle of magic water that costs five cents to make? (Water out of the tap, which makes up most of bottled waters is one cent a litre or a cent-and-a-bit for a quart.)

As was reported by Men’s Health in a story called, Sorry, but alkaline water isn’t actually good for you,

Enter a new crop of “enhanced waters” that claim to offer more health benefits and hydrate you more than plain old H2O. These electrolyte-enhanced, vitamin-boosted super waters might sound great on the surface, but when you dig a little deeper, the science gets a bit murky.

According to the experts, most enhanced H2O just doesn’t live up to the hype. “You’re better off saving your money and sticking to tap water,” says Alissa Rumsey R.D., C.S.C.S., an expert in fueling athletic performance.

But selling it don’t make you a bad guy. A smart capitalist, yes.

Anyway, the three well-liked surfers threw the post up and…oowee… out came the eco-surfer warriors swinging. From some of Taj’s 320,000 followers.

tommy_nails Sad to see you guys pushing such an environmentally harmful product.

cutbackwal Shit, more plastic bottles 👎👎👎

futureselff Love your work taj but can’t believe so many pro surfers are involved in the single use plastic bottled water business … what the?

futureselff Just a heads up to everyone that bottled water (glass or plastic ) is 1000 times more expensive than water out of a tap… the catch is that half the bottled water being sold actually comes from the tap 🤦‍♂️

spencerrundo Really? A surfer pushing plastic products? Shame.

deerjames Boooo

shannon66s Bad idea

neillmcwill I’m all good. Got a tap

surfarcade ALOT OF PLASTIC

c_0llemanz A life living from surfing, and you go and indorse this product, plastic wrapped in [email protected]&King plastic, way to go @tajamos

m4rkm4c Might be healthy for humans but not the environment @villagergoods. Biodegradable packaging a must!

danielrobertjames1 Fuck bottled water.

mrpaulwyatt Just had a great week surfing the Maldives.. so many plastic bottles there now all over the beach and ocean 🌊😕

The heat was a little too much for Freestone.  His post was quickly disappeared.

Taylor Knox’s fans, meanwhile, were, to a person, uniformly pleased by the contest.

An age thing?

Of course, this Villager giveaway ain’t the worst marketing fail of all-time.

Read about those here!


Brazilians pictured celebrating the return of their Tati.

Shocking: Tatiana Weston-Webb swaps teams!

A move no one saw coming!

You know Tatiana Weston-Webb as a phenomenal Kauaian regular foot and/or The Mother of Dragons. She is currently world number four thanks to a fearless approach to the tube and loose limb’d snaps.  Oh she is a very fine surfer but guess what? She is dumping her Kauai/USA surf nationality and swapping teams, headed for Brazil instead.

It’s true! And let’s read a dollop of press release first.

Today I’m excited to announce that, moving forward, I will be representing Brasil on both the WSL Championship Tour as well as in preparation for the 2020 Olympic Games in Tokyo. This is a major decision for me and one that I’m really excited about.

Most folks aren’t aware that my Dad is originally from England and my Mom is originally from Brasil. Brasil where I was born, but I feel truly blessed to have been raised on beautiful Kauai – both the community and the waves played a huge role in shaping who I am as a surfer and as a person. I am very grateful for that.

However, Brasil has always been an important part of who I am and, recently, I was approached by the Brasilian Olympic Committee with an opportunity to represent the country in a major way. It’s always been a dream of mine to compete in the Olympics and when surfing was announced as an official Olympic sport, I knew that my dream had a chance of becoming a reality.

Brasil owns a huge part of my heart. I have family, friends and a terrific amount of support there. It’s a place that has always felt like home and I am beyond proud to represent such an amazing country with so much passion and dedication for our sport. While this change gives me the opportunity to represent Brasil in 2020, all spots have to be earned and I’ll be trying my best to qualify as one of the few surfers able to represent their countries in the Olympics.

I consider myself very fortunate to enjoy fan support from Hawaii, Brasil and around the world. Thank you everyone for understanding, respecting, and supporting my decision.

First Kanoa Igarashi headed to Japan and now this. Before long, the United States will not have any professional surfers left, everyone surfing for their roots. Do you care about this nationalist juggling? Or not? I’m of two minds. I love that, theoretically, racist soccer hooligans can now riot for eugenic pride at surf events but also… I don’t know… country of origin or residence or birth seems like a not important part of the overall professional surf experience.

Tatiana dates Jesse Mendes, anyhow, and he is Brazilian. Do you think this factored into her decision?

If you could surf for any nation on earth which would you choose?


Captain Kelly Slater, inventor of pool, leader of US team featuring John John Florence and Carissa Moore. Standards of pure gold!

Get rich (or poor): Betting opens on Founders Cup!

America and Brazil favourites! Europe no chance!

Earlier today, the betting agency William Hill opened its book on the WSL Founders Cup of Surfing, which kicks over next weekend at the Slater-Fincham Surf Ranch.

I’ve got a real good feeling about the Founders Cup. I have a vague memory of a similar teams event that seemed to thrill all involved back when I was a little kid still affixed to mammy teat (The Swan Surfing Super Series)

Mixing surf stars and nationalism, the new-look pool and a three-hour format over each day, kicks me, as I think it will kick you, right in the obliques.

If you’re in Australia or Vegas or whatever, you might want to make it even more interesting by putting a little skin in the game. The odds, as you’ll soon learn, come with enough bait.

The US and Brazil, who clearly have the best teams, come in at $2.50, Australia at six bucks, the World Team, which is captained by Jordy Smith, at eight and the European team, with Reunion Island’s Johanne Defay as skipper, a distant fifteen-to-one.

Now, who you going to throw your money at?

Y’think the US, with John John and the man who has ridden more waves there than anybody and who knows its every kink (Kelly), can be beat?

Or Brazil, with Filipe and Gabriel?

Or will Australia, with Mick Fanning coming out of retirement especially for the event, bring lustre to the tank?

AUSTRALIA TEAM:

Captain: Stephanie Gilmore (AUS)
Mick Fanning (AUS)
Matt Wilkinson (AUS)
Julian Wilson (AUS)
Tyler Wright (AUS)

BRAZIL TEAM:

Captain: Gabriel Medina (BRA)
Adriano de Souza (BRA)
Filipe Toledo (BRA)
Silvana Lima (BRA)
Taina Hinckel (BRA)

EUROPE TEAM:

Captain: Johanne Defay (FRA)
Jeremy Flores (FRA)
Frederico Morais (PRT)
Leonardo Fioravanti (ITA)
Frankie Harrer (DEU)

USA TEAM:

Captain: Kelly Slater (USA)
John John Florence (USA)
Kolohe Andino (USA)
Carissa Moore (USA)
Courtney Conlogue (USA)

WORLD TEAM:

Captain: Jordy Smith (ZAF)
Michel Bourez (PYF)
Kanoa Igarashi (JPN)
Paige Hareb (NZL)
Bianca Buitendag (ZAF)


Fame: Who will be breakout WSL star?

The lights are about to get very bright.

Our World Surf League will appear on normal television this Saturday, May 5th for the Founders’ Cup live at Surf Ranch and I have a feeling that one of the World Surf League’s stars is going to breakout and become a household name. Oh not a professional surfer, don’t be silly. They are too busy complaining about sharks and wearing thick sunglasses/baseball hat combinations to get properly famous. No no I’m talking about the WSL’s true value. It’s announcers.

And here we have Ronald Blakey, ’89 World Champ Martin Potter, Pete “Condor” Mel, Strider Wasilewski, Rose Hodge, Jehoshaphat Turpel and someone I’m forgetting. One of them is set for bigger things. One of them is waiting to be discovered.

But who?

Ronald Blakey has all the good looks but 1/18 the charisma of his brother Vaughn. What’s an American supposed to do with a dull Australian? Not a lot and I don’t see Mr. B transcending the dais.

’89 World Champ Martin Potter has got a shot at a cooking show, I think. Like a redone Guy Fieri or that one man who yells “Bam!” after making sauces. Mr. P won’t yell “bam” that’s for sure but he might stutter, “The judges like those finishing moves at the Little Marley section…” Got a ring. No?

Peter Mel could very easily be a sturdy-jaw’d newsman, breaking stories. I see him sharing a desk with Rachel Maddow.

Strider W. is for sure the sleeper hit. Lemoore’s own Country Club Surf Club has already imagined him hosting a daytime television show (above) and I can’t disagree.

Rose Hodge could be big in South Africa and she could be big here too but she needs a little more Charlize and a little less ’89 World Champ in her dance.

J. Turpel would make a nice Scientologist.

So who? If you seriously had to put money on one of Da Crew leaving professional surfing behind to chase a real television career which would you choose?

Don’t you wish Barton Lynch was still here?

“Ahhhhhh loooooook…..”