What a time to be alive!
What a week. What a very special week. It all started, for me, with the official release of Cocaine + Surfing on Tuesday. I worried, briefly, that the news would be overshadowed by Kim Jong Un and Donald J. Trump’s meeting in Singapore but soon realized that nobody really cares about peace on the Korean peninsula. I did a reading that night at the iconic Warwick’s and am now sitting in the airport awaiting a flight to Florida for the premier of Trouble: The Lisa Andersen Story at the Florida Surf Film Festival. If you live anywhere near the Sunshine State I expect to see you there.
More will be written on that later but in the meantime, did you know that this is also National Women Learn to Surf Week? It’s true! And let us turn to the Corpus Christi Times for more:
Female surfers converged on Boogie-Bahn at Schlitterbahn Riverpark and Resort in Corpus Christi on June 12 to celebrate National Women Learn to Surf Week. World Pro Female BodyBoard Champions Cathy and Morgan Seabert, a mother-daughter team, were on board to instruct.
Cathy Seabert is a regular at Schlitterbahn, helping riders tackle the inland surf attraction during the season. Currently, she is ranked second in the world in her division of Pro Female BodyBoarding.
Some 20 female surfers from beginner to expert and ages 8 to 70 slid into the endless inland surf created by a blast of 50,000 gallons of water on Boogie-Bahn. The water is only 3 inches deep on the ride. Wipeouts land on a foam-covered surface, keeping everyone safe from harm.
This entire time I thought the Schlitterbahn was in Munich and was confused about which nation was celebrating Women Learn to Surf Week but just re-read and realized the Schlitterbahn is a chain of water parks in Texas. Anyhow, do you have time for a few quick questions before I board?
How difficult is it to get a National _______________ Week? Like, could we petition the U.S. Government for a National BeachGrit Cut n Paste Week? What about a National Venice Adjacent Gathering of Online Surf-ish Magazines That Have Located There in Order to Thrive and Seem Abbott Kinney Kool?
Do any of you know the process?
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This is great – Good podcast too. I’d love you both to tackle the question, “ are Democrats better for Surf because obviously they’re not polluting and putting our waves at risk from offshore drilling ?” You advertise yourself as brave enough to take on anything so agree or not ! I generally find you both so well reasoned that I can’t fathom you’d disagree. My heart sinks to think you’ll just punt saying you’re to good for that debate. Oh well we will see.
Does it involve pootang and titties.
We’ll have more time for both if we elect the more environmental party so we are not instead wasting all our time cleaning up after the mess of the polluting one.
Given that Leo is talking about mixing gold and silver rings while Bunker enlightened us with advice about shoving a dildo up your arse at the point of orgasm, I know who my role model is.
Have you ever tried? My kink flounders so badly when it comes to being penetrated.
… much better teasing the sphincter with your own teak nugget eh?
(I feel violated simply typing that)
While I am open-minded in relation to the pursuit of pleasure, any movement to that specific region reminds me that I like to think of it as a one way valve and clenching ensues.
… same. That comment was more snide than salutary.
Somehow Dez comments for “Women Learn to surf” added to Leo story – On Leo what “young” people can fucking afford Gucci??
But Fuck me if Gucci want to enter surf with $50K wetties I’m up for it as long as they sell to the “pool” market
It’s a damn URL recognition problem with Disqus. Our man in the hills of LA is working on it as I type!
Sweet champ thought let you know!!
“Man!” (sorry: “Woman!”), I truly used to enjoy the presence of a ‘mermaid’ or more in a crowded line-up. The moronic machismo level always seemed to drop a notch – crew seemed more open to sharing waves, laughs or even conversation. Now? Fuuuucck!!! Said mermaids have been replaced by overtly aggressive krackenesque creatures hell-bent on proving they can match – or better – the fellas. I’ve witnessed, and been on the receiving end of, some gobsmackingly horrid verbal abuse by young girls in the water. I’m all for female empowerment in every sense (fuck knows we’ve had our time in the sun) – BUT! basic respect, reason and accountability don’t have to be the unfortunate casualties of the process.
National Surf Stoned Week. This mess needs a reset button and this is it.
fuck yeah! I’ve lived that week for a decade (sober now)… unfortunately dognuts, it solves nada
In other news: https://www.surfline.com/su…
..and that was fast. I’m calling full-on surf pool arms race. A level of chess-like one-upmanship not seen since the Cold War posturing of the US and Russia. Kelly Kruschev and acronym entity the WSL have returned fire and want us all to be aware; the catchy headline, the cool-guy quote (Kerrzy’s still cool, right?).. smells like propaganda.
Sounds like a drag
Slit drag at the Schlitterbahn
I’m surprised there is no National Kelly Slater Week in the US. Maybe the WSL could promote/push this for the Surf ranch comp?
Man chicks go surf day , unreal get them g strings on babes and wet tbem titties down , im so into this new feminisation of the surf industry , i want more 10meter x 10 meter billboards showing some 5ft blond chick bent over pussy in your face pulling off a rad bottom turn , like bring it on now , except offcourse that Wright chick shes got a back end like a SUP.
There’s not a more fitting image to celebrate women’s surfing. So iconic.
I think the House does most of the naming days/weeks/months in honor of stuff. Your Congresswoman would bring it up for a vote for you. Most of them are rubber stamped through no problem.
I did not see the Texas part coming at all, so that was a fun surprise ending.
I have this image of 5000 Texans emptying their 10 gallon hats to create this wacky women’s wavepark wonderland while Kraftwerk performs a 24hr extended live version of their seminal electro masterwork “ Wir fahr‘n fahr‘n fahr‘n auf der Schlitterbahn “.
Amazing news! Amid all the celebration of this wonderful week, Rory Kennedy announced a new project centered around surfing titled, Hop Every Shoulder: The Life of Tara Ruttenberg. The movie is expected to be a huge success, with a planned worldwide release (2,700 theaters) set for June of next year.
Could you please inform Mr Kennedy that I would be very happy to play the role of a 50 something white male balding surfer in any scenes filmed in the Maldives especially at that forgiving left with the bar out the front .
please say a musical.
Yes I’m super psyched for a musical too!
Something dark like Les Misérables or Westside Story or light and whimsical along the line of Cats or Starlight Express? Or maybe retrace Tara’s intellectual and spiritual journey along the yellow brick road ( If I only had a brain 🧠 )?
All great ideas! Personally, my preference is Starlight Express. Chas in a pair of skates dancing and singing would be as anti-depressive as it gets I think.
You are milking the shit out of Tara – and doing a very good job!!!
Having just released Cocaine + Surfing, and now travelling to Florida, how long do you think you’ll have to wait before hearing a Crockett/Miami Vice joke aimed at you? I say you don’t make it out of the Florida airport.
I’m going to stay in the terminal til someone uses.
Hopefully these champion lady boogie-boarders will learn how to surf this week!
This is a good reminder that the world at large thinks bodyboarding is the exact same thing as surfing. Hear that, WSL?
Hey now, it’s because of that distinction that I can tell people I “surfed” 8 to 10 ft (Hawaiian) Jocko’s one time. Let’s not educate the public any further on that, for my legacy.
Jimmy as a saint you probably have the ear of god . Was just wondering if you could ask him/her if he/she thought it was funny that the ladies were using the Body (board ) of Christ as a flotation device in a town called Corpus Christi ( the body of Christ) ?
He thinks I went in for a cheap shot, but I’m not above a low blow for the sake of an upvote! In general he frowns on surfcraft snobbery, except in relation to SUPs, which are after all the work of the devil!
He also washed his hands of Texas after Waco!
Amen and ahhh Awomen too 🤔
Because of David Koresh or the wave pool?
He didn’t elaborate and it’s exhausting trying to make sense of his parables!
At the wave pool of Waco he chose brother Seth the son of Tony over brother Joshua the son of Tony to confront the sinner Kelly the son of no one by the Holy Sea of Lemoore?