From the Having-cake-and-eating-too Dept: Australian scientists test shark-bite resistant wetsuit!

All fear is gone!

Who sang the mid-1980s banger “Didn’t We Almost Have it All?” Was it Madonna? No wait, it was totally Whitney Houston. “Didn’t we almost have it all? When love was all we had worth giving. The ride was worth the fall my friend…” etc. A fine enough song though filled with too much melancholy and one that surfers can forever erase because now we DO have it all… have it all in the form of a shark-bite resistant wetsuit.

Booya.

An Australian university is testing new materials designed to lessen the impact of shark bites, researchers said Tuesday (Jan 29), in a project aimed at reducing fatalities and easing the nerves of swimmers.

Researchers at Flinders University in Adelaide have received government funding to test a new neoprene – a synthetic rubber commonly used in wetsuits – against the force of a bite from several species, including the great white shark.

The new material – provided by manufacturers the university declined to identify – aims to reduce cuts and punctures from a shark attack, thus lessening blood loss for victims.

“We are cognisant that it will not prevent all injuries as it will not prevent fractures or crushing injuries,” associate professor Charlie Huveneers told AFP.

“However, most shark-bite fatalities are due to blood loss, and the ability to reduce such blood loss along with rapid emergency responses will hopefully decrease fatalities and injuries due to shark bites.”

Are you in for full pop? Is this the final bit of news you needed to build your dream home in Reunion?

Or are you filled with too much melancholy and a disbeliever?

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
45 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
Grego
Grego
7 years ago

not so funny we lost very good mate here in reunion !!

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago

Haven’t read than in 30 years. GOT to find a copy now. Thanks for the reminder!

turts
turts
7 years ago

Great. So my body will just be crushed within those jaws and my head will pop off shooting my innards outwards. Like standing on a tube of toothpaste

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago
Reply to  turts

Some people pay for that sort of treatment, honey.

Mild mannered civil servant
Mild mannered civil servant
7 years ago

One’s self is one’s greatest oppressor and villain…

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

Valuable social experiment , gathering important data in an attempt to answer surfing’s essential question .
Is Surfing better than Sex ?

Mild mannered civil servant
Mild mannered civil servant
7 years ago

The answer I found was that it depends on the frequency and quality of either in relation to the other. Also, that surfing could be characterised as more frustrating, but with less regret inherent in the act.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

Here here .

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

All is well . Only come here for a giggle and not to judge or be judged .

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago

Your photoshop guy needs a raise.
Top marks every time.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

I think you may have described Al Hunt ? Don’t suppose they needed wetsuits either …..

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

Must be a king
[Arthur and Patsy “ride” through the village]
Large Man: Who’s that then?
Dead Collector: I dunno. Must be a king.
Large Man: Why?
Dead Collector: He hasn’t got shit all over him.

ricmatic
ricmatic
7 years ago

Lets not quibble about who killed who!

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

“I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.”

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

There goes the Shrubbery !

Jen See
Jen See
7 years ago

If I lived in your town right now, I think I’d come egg your house for the Whitney Houston ear worm. Cruelty!

Otto
Otto
7 years ago

Scientists associated with the testing have remarked that while the new wetsuit material results in decreased risk of blood loss from shark bites, they emphasize that the biggest advancement with this new technology is that it provides sound foundation to pass blame onto surfers, especially in warmer waters, who refuse to put the risk of heat exhaustion before blood loss due to a shark bite.

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
7 years ago

LT heading to Ballina to test out the new gear!
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

Oh Karl c‘est formidable . Who‘d have thought that Paco Rabanne and Lord Ted Deerhurst would collaborate with Godefroy Hurley d‘Huntington on this magic metallic ensemble perfect for any surfing occasion like the SIMA Waterman‘s Ball ? They’ll be loving Longtom longtime .

Got style
Got style
7 years ago

“Paco Rabanne”…. somebody that has been around!

Nice

Vive la France

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago
Reply to  Got style

I could babble on but found this in Vogue .
“Arguing that “sewing is a bondage,” he made dresses not of fabric, but of earth-friendly paper and other non-fashion materials like plastic and metal, which were pieced together with wire and glue. (He’d later sell DIY kits consisting of discs, rings, and pliers.) Rabanne’s designs existed in the space between art and fashion, and they were irresistible.”
So when I saw the photo posted by Karl Largerfeld oops Von Fannningstadt Rabanne’s metallic dresses from the 60s and 70s came to mind .

couture
couture
7 years ago

Top notch designer…. For the sexiest fit lady…trust me I know!… expensive and rare!

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
7 years ago

strange looking paddles. perhaps I need to start paying more attention to the current SUP trends.

Rumpelstiltskin
Rumpelstiltskin
7 years ago

Ready for the battle at backsides

Strider's Gobble Neck
Strider's Gobble Neck
7 years ago

Bets on Medina dropping Rip Curl by Margie’s

Superworm
Superworm
7 years ago

Inside info?

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago
Reply to  Superworm

He called off the comp, cuz Noahs. ‘member?

Superworm
Superworm
7 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

But dump the Curl? For Adidas?

Strider's Gobble Neck
Strider's Gobble Neck
7 years ago
Reply to  Superworm

Straight from the ski

Gino
Gino
7 years ago

Crack is whack

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

Well if they put seals on the seams it will only exacerbate the problem …..?

astro
astro
7 years ago

For several decades I have been researching sharks and am now in a position to reveal that exhaustive testing at our super, secret Shark Tank and Research Facilty in Astrograd has finally delivered the perfect solution. Begone foolish wetsuits, sharkbanz, nets and drumlines.

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago
Reply to  astro

Fuck ! Navy Seals . Brilliant .

Mild mannered civil servant
Mild mannered civil servant
7 years ago

The plus of seals on the seams is that though weighty, smelly and quite aggresive, they’d be like a layer of [sort of] reactive armour… also immensely warm.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

Leto Atreides II from The Children of Dune ( book 3 in the Dune Series ) does something similar with sand trout ,constructing a skin which is not his own , making him invincible ,and goes on to rule the known Galaxy for 3500 years becoming less and less human in the process . Makes 11 world titles seem like a doddle ?

Mild mannered civil servant
Mild mannered civil servant
7 years ago

Reminds me of a winter stuck in a small apartment in Copenhagen reading the Dune series, becoming less human each day.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

Danish Romance , work or studies ?

Mild mannered civil servant
Mild mannered civil servant
7 years ago

Romance — a wonderful woman with a love of literature with a summer house next to the North Sea. Ultimately though, my love of southern seas called me home — never has 1 foot summer slop seemed so heavenly.

Jordy's pout
Jordy's pout
7 years ago

I’ve often fantasized about training some pet seals to swim around me while I surf. Tastier targets.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

You’re a much more empathetic human than I could ever hope to be . I dreamed of a having a pet shark which would permit to surf alone in Sydney !

Jordy's pout
Jordy's pout
7 years ago

I’m terrible at training animals though, so I usually just soak myself in tyrannosaurus urine. Great whites are terrified of T-Rex!

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

Sometimes there is just no alternative to fossil fuel ?

Superworm
Superworm
7 years ago

Why not just dream to surf outside of Sydney James!

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago
Reply to  Superworm

I did and left in 92 .

Jen See
Jen See
7 years ago

oof.


45
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x