Why does the League go so far out of its way to embarrass, mock, dishonor and discredit California's premier big wave?
The big story at the end of last week was the re-jiggering of the Big Wave World Tour. As you know, every event other than Jaws and Nazare were tossed in the garbage, replaced by a “strike mission” scenario where big-wave surfers will go, followed by World Surf League cameras and put their lives on the line for free. I also know this last bit got some of you down, the ruthlessly capitalistic cost-cutting of Dirk Ziff, who happens to own professional surfing and also happens to be a billionaire. The turning of “World Surf League” from an actual sporting league to a content platform mining poor souls’ desire for fame and refusing to pay thereby spiking the bottom line.
Me?
I only see possibility. I only see the wonderful opportunity for big wave surfers of the world banding together and forming a union, refusing to paddle on the big days if World Surf League cameras are present and they’re not getting paid. Brutalizing scab surfers who cross the lines and paddle in exchange for an Instagram post on @wsl. I have no doubt that big wave surfers could bring the World Surf League to its knees. Look at all the good press WSL CEO Sophie Goldschmidt and her righthand WSL President of Content, Media, Studios and Mild Salsa Erik “Elo” Logan for bringing “equal pay” into the game. Imagine all the bad press for treating big wave surfers like second class citizens. Like the transgendered of old.
Rise up, brave men and women! Rise up and conquer the giant from Santa Monica!
In other news, why does the World Surf League love to endlessly humiliate Mavericks?
It was one of the big waves tossed in the garbage but for years and years it seems the WSL goes far out of its way to embarrass, mock, dishonor, discredit humiliate Mavericks. The contest doesn’t run, even when there are spectacular waves, and even though it is a spectacular venue only gets mentioned in the latest press-release as “possibility” for a “strike mission.” It seems, to me, the World Surf League acquired the event simply to make fun of it for years before a public execution.
But why?
Do you think co-Waterman of the Year tried to surf Mavericks once yet was too chicken to drop, thus creating a life long vendetta wherein he tries to bury his shame?
Something else?
Help!
If I was a famous big wave surfer I’d just start my own tour.
Who cares if the wsl prevents them from surfing at the handful of events they own the licence to. Just hold it somewhere else.
Boxing’s got 4 different organisations. Start a rebel tour and crown your own champ.
Easy.
Mavericks, ugh, the epitome of toxic masculinity.
A wave like that only serves to foster a dominance hierarchy in the lineup and it’ll express its violence without any concern for your safe-space…Ugh, totally toxic, not good for equity, I need a soyshot-halfcaff, maybe a double.
my comment is represented by the cats anus.
like a proud cat bringing a large mouse into the house, toying with it for while then instead of killing the mouse , it loses interest and heads of to eat some tinned chicken liver before settling down to lick its balls while the mouse dies a slow death under couch.
You had me at Mild salsa ELO…
Now you’re cooking Chas. I should’ve seen the long game
There are few enough big wave surfers and an actual international hierarchy. Imagine Twiggy, Navarro, Florence boys, Rothmans, etc etc met, made a pact then traveled to all the places they normally do. They could negotiate a pay package with the WSL. If WSL refused they have enough clout to stop other surfers from paddling. It’d be epic!
Oh even better- convince those guys to stay home in protest! The WSL wouldn’t have anything to shoot. That’s the answer!
Way to out a spot SS
Nocturnal E-Lomission
WSL new products department releases ….
Say no to Stoke and stroke . Just think about it ….
The Thought Crime disposable Plastic Sheets with Athletes Name and Number ? 1984 or well any other number you can think of ..
COMING SOON ! in your sleep …… enter sandman
What would a dream CT tour look like?
Top 16 only
Events at …
Chopes
Jbay
Indo
Western Australia
Kirra
Cloudbreak
Season ending at Pipe
Invitational Eddie & Jaws if it’s huge
Proper waiting periods. Run an event in a day. Two at most.
Every round is an elimination round
Keep the cameras rolling during any trials and free surfs when the waves are on
Good commentary team. One that can shut up once in a while and let the action run. Ron, Strider, maybe Barton
I’d theoretically support this to ensure the participants are thoroughly ‘well rounded’ and get to fully empty their bladders / colon at the end of the tour.
But I suppose it calls into question what the ‘Dream Tour’ is meant to actually entail.
Is it a range of waves that the average surfer might dream to realistically attempt to ride?
Or is it saying “Ok little buddy, you’re meant to be the top of the game so you’ll ride to the best of your ability, whatever the fuck we throw you into’ ?
The latter
(Big Thumbs Up Hybrid Shaka Emoji)
Yup. Any champ worth their salt should be able to go in any size.
Their sphincters should be as tight as their six-packs.
…live cuts to the judges and coaches at critical moments.
Absolutely yes.
Great idea filming trials and free surfs . A chance to see what’s really going on .
would definitely help with my punting.
Truth . I once picked Jordy Smith in my fantasy team a few years ago for J Bay , then I saw him turn up , he could hardly walk and was 10 kg overweight with a back problem .
you said it. On Point Matt, that tour would have Felipe toledo, Panda Bear, back in the QS or retiring for good that way they could run the family surf tour they would have stops in Rio, snapper, trestles, malibu etc..
Felipe won j bay 2 years in a row.
1. Add a “Best Wave of the Year While Interviews are Occurring Award” to the end of year show.
2. Limit Barton to one or two 3 minute segments for him to blab on about. That’s it. He can be quite entertaining and seems like a pleasant fellow.
3. Get Joel decent color persons, allow him fewer than 132 words per heat, every other heat.
4. Give a random surfer priority for any wave of their choosing during event finals.
It’s everyone’s fault, san Andrea’s. Had an ex named Andrea. “It” was never her fault too.
LOL
I bet she loved tectonic plate lunches though . I read that the American continent is sliding slowly North ( apparently about the same speed as nails grow ) so LeMoore may one day ,at least geographically, replace Mavericks in a few million years or more .
She could build mountains out of mole hills. Defied (geo)logical time.
mild salsa… hilarious.
Always the widest of smiles too. No matter what.
Does a Ziff surf or sponge? I hedge toward a sponge, or a tow on an inland water way in Florida, close to Mar a largo. just a hedge
“…just a hedge.”
As in: “Look at me having lots of fund!”
yes, but i am more of a “bet” kind of guy and less “fund” in my income bracket
Having watched Life Styles of the Rich and Famous once , I imagine he has a gold wave bath with gold taps , surfing coins like Scrooge Mcduck etc etc etc …. basically he surfs on golden ponds
https://m.youtube.com/watch…
That’s because the WSL endlessly loves to humiliate California.Seriously, am I the only one watching the WSL take a fat runny turd on CA?
Proof is in the pudding.
Now I can’t eat the rest of my macmuffin.
You owe me $2.50
No I don’t.
Inflation…I owe you $3.02.
Why not just bin the whole thing & turn Kai Lenny into the new Elvis/Frankie Avalon, punching out endless tacky, plotless films like beach blanket bingo or blue Hawaii & making cameo appearances as himself in the bold & the beautiful & while at it, he could team up with the Hoff for a new release of Baywatch, helping Mitch clear the beach of undesirables so that the beautiful people can sunbake?
Maybe Erik Logan is just projecting from all the bullying he’s got from Taylor Swift. Oldest sibling bullies the middle sibling who bullies the youngest. Shit rolls down hill, he’s taking it out on Mavericks
I think the WSL is scared that the Big wave world tour outshines the top 34 and top 17. Wasn’t the Peahi comp the most watched wsl event of all time?
They didn’t run Mavs because nobody would of watched the pipe masters last year. That entire week was contest worthy. Monday was massive and Thursday’s guys were getting drained on the left. The Eddie and The Mavs comp are the only two events that gain mainstream news attention. The only comps of cultural significance to the non-surfing audience. I’m puzzled like you, Chas. Hope that an outside entity can make it happen.
You bring up an excellent point. The WSL can’t risk viewers wondering why Big Wave isn’t THE Olympic surfing event.
Guess since they’re now in the business of telling stories, and not professional surfing, maybe there’s no stories to tell about Mavericks?
But what about a heartwarming story where a crusty old local takes a brave young man under his wing and teaches him how to conquer fear etc that we could call Chasing Mavericks? Oh…
So let’s pitch Elo on a Chasing Mavericks franchise a la Fast and The Furious. First up…
Chasing Mavericks 2: 2 Big 2 Paddle
(Ahem) https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
“Huhuhuh, he put two ‘e’s in ‘Mavericks'”
Me: “It’s a bonus feature, you cornhole”
Mavericks Top Shun
https://uploads.disquscdn.c… Hey I got a little runner on the inside!
The more I look at this image the more I’m feeling a little spooked and a’thinkin “IT’S MEANT TO BE”.
I pooped it out in’bout 2 minutes including interweb searching for pictures, but i reckon Jebus he’self was operating me like finger puppet to make it happen.
I mean… just you look at the triangular shape all the surfboards make (mystikal trinangles!!!)
Look at the original Boogy-loo graphic colourway and IT’S THE SAME ON THE SURFYBOARD!!!
Mavericks: a wave off California
Breaky-dancey movie: making wavey motions with arms and pelvis filmed IN CALIFORNIA.
‘Lectric Boogaloo: has people in it.
Chasing Mavericks: HAD PEOPLE IN IT!!!
The cooincidences and mystikal signs are TOO (two) MUCH NOT TO BE A SIGN FROM GOD.
I tell you. That Da Vinci COde aint’ got shit on this.
ELO.
This is obviously meant for you.
MAKE IT REAL.
You know it’s the right thing.
We’ll negotiate a fee soon.
Call me.
I appreciate you, channelbottom.
I love Mhasing Cavericks!
Just don’t go skin diving with your “friends”
In Santa Cruz we say “live off Jay” not “live like Jay”
Or maybe there’s too many people who think Maverick’s is their ticket to ride?
IDK but here’s a freebie: if somebody tells you they are in “the business of telling stories”, you can be sure they’re not going to tell the truth.
CC: Pat O’Connell
I read “freebie” as “frisbee”, which made me think I wouldn’t ever worry about getting my frisbee stuck in a tree with a dog like this:
https://youtu.be/NWhL1ryluJg
Man! Those dawgs are badass!!