Build your dream home overlooking most crowded wave in world!
If you were Ziff or his monied ilk, where would you pour your riches? Cars? Jets?
Boats you can park in international waters and play out your every illegal vice until your jaw is tired and around you are the desiccated husks of citizens from every corner of eastern Europe?
If was I, it would be this fine quarter-acre of dirt, currently home to a low-rise block of ghetto apartments with point-blank views of the Supa Bank, and with a price tag north of twelve-million Australian dollars, roughly 500 American or thirty British pounds.
Rare real estate overlooking the world famous Snapper Rocks surf break is up for grabs!
It's prime for redevelopment and could be turned into a high-rise. @BrendonWolf9 #9News pic.twitter.com/iIUc5pRfOn
— 9News Gold Coast (@9NewsGoldCoast) August 28, 2019
I would commence destruction of the apartments immediately and build a home modelled after the French castle Vaux le Vicomte. It would include a 3,000-square-foot wine cellar with a tasting room, two-story library, commercial kitchen, cutlery room and spacious ballroom. Turkish baths would also be installed in every room.
The old Wolf Pak, which I’d bring back together, would be employed as full-time crowd control and installed in a pavilion at the rear. That part of the house would remain out of bounds to my girlfriends.
Children with whisky breath would be free to roam and little dogs sourced from Mexico would be trained to walk on their hind legs.
Why the twelve-mill for the land?
Buy it and you can build almost forty metres (130 feet) into the Gold Coast sky.
The six owners are rumoured to include the four-time world champ Mark Richards, who owns the top floor apartment, and a prominent boat owner currently at sail in the Mentawais.
Another of man’s fuck ups…. When Kirra used to be the queen, Snapper was relatively quiet. I’ve surfed Snapper alone…. dead serious (1980ish).
Pumping sand is like building the monster Chas identifies in his latest story. Sure, it all comes together occasionally and perfect, but Kirra is compromised, little groyne doesn’t appear to exist (from photos) and the WSL has to host contests at Dbah walking distance to another state(?).
That also was perplexing…. why wasn’t the state line the groynes at Dbah? Man does curious things.
Yep , surfed Snapper 3ft ( 8ft pool height ) running all the way to the end of Rainbow Bay with 5 to 10 blokes out mid week in 87 .
The Tweed River Entrance Training Walls were extended in the 1960s and basically created Duranbah beach , long after the State Border between NSW and Queensland had been drawn on the top map …
Thanks for the explanation, I spent the 80’s wondering how that could have happened.
You’re gonna laugh at me James, but I’d surf Kirra at dawn until the big boys showed up around 8ish…. Bruce Lee, Guy O, that crew. Talk about competitive lineups. So I’d just catch a scrap and head down to little Groyne…. holy fuck was that a high performance heaven.
For us Cali’s out there, Little Groyne was like the old wedge off North Oceanside Jetty when it used to spin all the way to the beach. Any turn in your bag of trick, lay into it.
And Long toms hood was empty, Angourie had empty week days midday. You’re lucky to have tapped that as a young kid. What great trips. If US kids only knew how fun the east coast of OZ was and is.
Remember that sTAB article about the best metroplitan surf city. Sydney wins by miles and miles.
On that trip in 87 Dbah was absolutely jammed packed every day every session but I wanted , ADS style , to work on my backhand and surfed Currumbin Alley with a few locals and stragglers mid week but cracked ,as a goofy , and occasionally went left to bust a few airs towards Elephant Rock .
Sydney is stressful , but such an easy place to go surf everyday , before ,during or after work . During the week in the 80s I only really surfed in a 2 km zone but it was surfable from 10cm to 10 ft with beachbreaks usually shit, a semi permanent rip bowl , a point and a slab .
I was employed writing reviews for hotels and restaurants in major cities…. in my case, Hawaii, Mexico and Sydney. Pool dude at the Regent advises me that the northerly wind was blowing hard that afternoon at the hotel pool.
“Go to the Northern Penninsula”…. something like that with vague directions. I found Narrabeen and it was going off…. but busy. I looked to the beach park and it was oil glass and A frames everywhere. Surfed alone, days on end with the city nearby. Got to “work” and surf, awesome trip.
Had bad luck on the south side… Cronulla was not good on maybe 3 separate trips. Was about to bail on the south when I found Sandon and fell in love. You guys were fortunate to have that south coast so close, around every corner was another good set up.
We have been struggling with the powers that be for 3 years so my wife can practice her profession in Oz . A suitable hospital ,an hour south of Sandon, would be perfect , so I can finish my days , looking after wife and bringing up the kids and go surfing EVERY FUCKIN DAY after 7 years of surfing 3 months a year . Inshallah … if the gods want it to be
Shellharbour Hospital Redevelopment:
https://www.hinfra.health.n…
You’re welcome.
Thanks Foamie Lord , my wife is a Specialist Gynecologist / Obstetrician in Germany and we have been chasing papers and translating them and filling out forms and then more and more translations waiting for the governing body in Australia to give us the green light . We were actually looking slightly further south at Nowra but anywhere in that area south of Sydney would be wonderful .
I think it might be easier to qualify for the CT ?
Hey again – this one is further south… but a few years behind the first one.
https://www.nsw.gov.au/your…
Thanks mate . We have visited this one a few times .
Dang..North Jetty was so fun back then..
yup bucc
Sydney is crap….. Really. Don’t believe the hype. I’ve lived here for 6 years now… Moved to the northern beaches… Worst decision ever. .. hardly get any work done. Don’t come it’s bad for evolution
I’d purchase a entire village than a bulldozer and demolish the village to generate attention to the plight of the homeless.
Than I’d purchase a large and successful factory that employs thousands and bulldozed that to generate attention for the plight of the unemployed.
With the rubble I’d bulldoze that into the ocean to raise awareness of pollution in the sea.
My bulldozer would be orange in color and named ” Randy Anne “.
so if you had all the money in the world, why would you live or want to be anywhere near a million others? People suck.. and speaking of suck.. are you referring to “illegal activities” as such… or just copious amounts of blow?
Hey I stayed in that joint for a week before quik pro this year! Top spot, cheap as chips, and you could watch occy come out of the surf club at 2pm every arvo with his wobbly boot on. There’s an old lady who lives on the bottom level who would leave passive aggressive hand written notes about towels over the balcony, dunno what happens to her?
She may have thrown in the towel ?
It’d been hanging over her for a while
I suppose, even though the rooms may have resembled cells , it was neither Jail or Monastery , So certain liberties could be taken …… If she doesn’t want to get towelled ,may I suggest she stand up to the new project just by doing squat …. ?
Seriously though , it’s always a shame to see people , especially old ones , even Towel Nazis , get kicked out of of a spot they have been living in for years , when another beach side suburb decides its time for GENTRIFICATION… ?
Same things are happening everywhere. The greediest view, Overlooking the Indian reservation in my hometown is about to be developed into gosh ugly hipster condos. They call it progress, but wait until Mother Nature decides to end it all. That is not far off.
You really are the most French person I know, Derek. And I mean that as the greatest of compliments.
One day I’ll live in the Aquitaine in a real castle and I’ll wave to you, JP, from across the trench.
If the rest of Aquitaine is anything like the Medoc , you may end up not speaking French but Mandarin with fellow inhabitants of neighboring Ivory Towers ?
I wish you surf industry/media/tour types, or whatever specific label you prefer, would stop being so enamored with France. If not for your love affair with the French Nation, I’m quite positive there would be a lot less date rapes whenever the Slater Brothers and their stooge Rob Machado come to town. WOW – Those two really like sex. Needs more publicity
Derek , the book royalties must be on the up …. ? Think bigger , be a true visionary …. . A Museum of Contemporary Art like Frank Gehry’s Guggenheim Museum Bilbao just up the road from Mundacca or An Opera to rival the other one at Bennelong Pt . Everyone will complain , the budget will blow out , heads will fall but people will come from all over the world for generations and whisper your name while running around the point to jump off Reilly’s Rocks ?
Did you ever climb mt warning on mushrooms?
No but , I saw Bede on a Mt Woodgee
You’re on fire JB 😂
Oh, royalties, down, down, down. But new book on its way. Here’s a little look. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Well done Derek and congratulations . The power of the story teller is real , so please keep telling our stories ,lest we forget .
On a less serious note if you cannot recreate Le Chateau Vaux Le Vicomte you could open a small , anti minimalist , literary surf Bar …?
Snapper Baroque …. ?
“He is the son of a pro wrestler father and diplomat mother and the co-founder of Stab magazine. Derek worked as a blackjack dealer and bartender before becoming a full-time writer.” After seeing this , I believe you are the perfect candidate for the job …?
Like JP, your invitation to the Surf Lit Bar is of the open sort, Bickerton.
Wonderful ..
I am not much of a scrapper
but could clean the Crapper
While others discuss important matters and make passes
I could wipe the zinc and wash the glasses .
god that sounds good.
If Snapper Baroque doesn’t click , I had in mind Hoy Polloi or Single Finnegan ?
Oh fuck yeah man!
Derek, didn’t Keanu reeves teach you anything about where to place your hands in publicity photos?
Wow. Robert Hawke, then Gulpilil… Kudos 👏🏽
Thats disturbing!,,
Not interested.
All proper tea, is theft.
« La propriété, c’est le vol. »
Pierre Joseph PROUDHON (1809-1865), Qu’est-ce que la propriété ? (1840)
I thought is was Carl Mugs.
PJP ….. was apparently the only Revolutionary Theoretician from the XIX century who came from the French Working Class and had actually lived in the squalor .
Proudhon was the first person to refer to himself as an “anarchist”. So could possibly be described as the Founding Father of Punk ?