WSL: Surfers “ecstatic” at
one-billion-dollar six-star “eco-resort” and wavepool on “highly
constrained” coastal land!
By Derek Rielly
'It includes a six-star eco resort, another 200
rooms of accommodation, restaurants, bars, a retail village and an
environmental education centre based on the site's wetlands and
nearby waterways."
“Think of the press as the great keyboard on which the
government can play,” said German spin-doctor Joey
Goebbels, sometime in the mid-thirties.
It’s a lesson developers, rapacious consumers of untouched land,
know well.
Earlier today, and following various news reports over the last
couple of weeks about a Slater pool on 510-hectares (1260 acres) of
“highly constrained land” on Australia’s Sunshine Coast, various
media outlets have regurgitated the latest spin from the WSL.
The Sydney Morning Herald reported,
Surfing’s governing body, the World Surf League, wants to
build the artificial wave pool within a tourist and residential hub
proposed for a 510-hectare site at Coolum on the Sunshine
Coast.
“Australia is really important market for the World Surf
League,” the league’s general manager for Australia and Oceania,
Andrew Stark, said.
It includes a six-star eco resort, another 200 rooms of
accommodation, restaurants, bars, a retail village and an
environmental education centre based on the site’s wetlands and
nearby waterways.
Mr Stark said the 20,000-spectator stadium would cater to
recreational surfers and aim to draw major competitions and events,
including world qualifiers.
“The surfing community is ecstatic and excited. People go to
these facilities and it’s quite a mind-blowing
experience.”
Let’s unpack as they say in the corpo world the WSL and
developers inhabit.
What does “six-star eco-resort” mean?
Wouldn’t a true eco-resort be a small clearing among the trees,
maybe a few tents, where people might commune with nature, examine
animals in their natural habitat, regard the stars at night etc,
not bars, “a retail village” and a “20,000-spectator stadium.”
As for the “environmental education centre based on the site’s
wetlands and nearby waterways” upon which the 510-hectare,
tree-pulverising, energy-inhaling development will be built,
well, fuck me.
Onto other important matters, should it be “wave pool”,
“wave-pool” or “wavepool.”
I prefer the latter.
More over the coming weeks from our North Coast and Queensland
reporter, Longtom.
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Listen: “The World Surf League is
lily-livered if it doesn’t pounce on pro-Hong Kong freedom
moment!”
By Chas Smith
This is our time!
This damned Hong Kong thing, I’ll tell you
what, and I’m back on another sauvignon blanc fueled soapbox. Just
teetering around up here, strangling my wine glass’s neck with one
hand, waving a crooked finger in the air with the other and trying
not to spill.
Or spit.
This damned Hong Kong thing.
I know I already spit last night
as it relates to Vans but a new day has dawned, I went
up to chat with just-revealed-as-Portuguese Deivid Lee Scales, got
all agitated about Western capitulation, drove home getting more
and more agitated as I went while listening to National Public
Radio, stopped for white wine like any good truly aggrieved
NPR-laced white gal would, and started writing.
Fuck China.
And with the National Basketball League’s complete and utter
embarrassing rolling over, our World Surf League should make a
strategic move, pull their two-star longboarding event from
Shenzhen and become the champions of freedom.
Of free speech, free movement, free association, free…
refills.
Now is your time President of Content, Media, Studios and
Shoestring French Fries Erik “ELo” Logan. For the cost of a
one-star Junior event in Fuzhou you can become the Martin Luther
King Jr. of organized sport.
Now is your moment CEO Sophie Goldschmidt. For the price of the
Qingdao Open you can become Mahatma Gandhi.
Seriously, if the World Surf League doesn’t capitalize on this
glorious black and white second, this one second where it can
actually stand up for honest-to-goodness freedom for the cost
of one Qiantang River Pro then what the hell?
Where is the vision?
Why continue to exist?
I implore you, Co-Waterperson of the Year and Owner of
Professional Surfing Dirk Ziff, to recognize you are already a
billionaire and throw your metaphorical weight behind something you
should theoretically believe in. It is the easiest virtue signal
ever, virtue signaling for something that actually and truly
matters.
How much more money do you need?
You can be the next Steve Jobs.
Deivid Lee Scales and I also discussed the virtue of pooping in
wetsuits, Riss Moore and Kelly Slater’s dramatic arc.
Have a long commute home from work?
Come listen!
P.S.
FUCK CHINA!
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Jezza seems to have been in a “post-pro” phase
for a while. The dad bod and reckless honesty. He's got that
rad-uncle-you-want-to-have-a-beer-with-at-Christmas vibe, yet seems
more relevant than ever amongst a Tour more overtly Christian than
Middle America. WSL
Jeremy Flores wins Quiksilver Pro, France:
“The most honest pro since Bobby Martinez, minus the suicide
vest!”
By Longtom
Marked by fate, determined by an invisible
rhythm…
Seemed a bold move, ballsy in the (discredited)
vernacular, to call it off the other day in clean four-to-six-foot
surf at La Nord.
It would make it hard to finish in a day by my reckoning but
they did and the Wozzle scored the best day of the waiting period
so props to Jessy Miley-Dyer. The real best day this time, apart
from some high-tide wonk on the outer bank before they moved it
into the shore-break for the Finals.
Like the Surf Ranch but for entirely opposite reasons, the
climax of this event also seemed pre-ordained. Marked by fate,
determined by an invisible rhythm that Jeremy Flores identified in
a post-heat presser and activated from the first wave he rode to
the last. It was such a simple equation, from a pulled back
perspective, rhythm was key, the first good
scoring wave ridden in a heat inevitability secured victory.
Jezza did it time and time again. To Jordy, to Ryan Callinan, to
Jack Freestone and ultimately to Italo Ferreira in the Final. He
never looked like getting beaten. The kindof king hell roll that,
looking back through the years at his record in France, seems
almost insane because it stands alone.
He said he did nothing different from previous failed campaigns.
Threw sporting cliché after sporting cliché into a beautiful gallic
dumpster fire. Jezza seems to have been in a “post-pro” phase for a
while. The dad bod and reckless honesty. He’s got that
rad-uncle-you-want-to-have-a-beer-with-at-Christmas vibe, yet seems
more relevant than ever amongst a Tour more overtly Christian than
Middle America.
We love Jezza for his honesty. The most honest pro since Bobby
Martinez, minus the suicide vest. He called the basin, I’ll use the
official term, a joke then went out laid down a masterclass in
taming an unruly hollow beachbreak. Outer bar and inner bar. He
said local advantage was non-existent and there was a “lot of luck”
involved.
He said he did nothing different from previous failed campaigns.
Threw sporting cliché after sporting cliché into a beautiful gallic
dumpster fire. Jezza seems to have been in a “post-pro” phase for a
while. The dad bod and reckless honesty. He’s got that
rad-uncle-you-want-to-have-a-beer-with-at-Christmas vibe, yet seems
more relevant than ever amongst a Tour more overtly Christian than
Middle America.
That was the scaffolding. The building itself; if you’ll pardon
the mangled metaphor, was a mixed bag. Some got to grips with the
outer bank, strafed by rip current and side wobble, most did not.
Strider became incensed that competitors were out of position as
drainers spat their intestines out up the bank. Leo Fioravanti had
to watch on helplessly as Ace Buchan dropped off the ski and
paddled straight into one while Leo held priority. The priority
judge Ratso Buchanan, earned his money with some big calls that decided
heats.
None bigger than the one in the dying stages of the Round of 16
heat between Andino and Yago Dora. Protecting a small lead with
priority as the clock ticked down a throaty set wave arched on the
bank with Dora and Andino on the button. It was a heat-winning wave
and Andino had a solid sniff at it. Priority, by my reading of the
rule book, should have swapped.
But it didn’t and Andino and Dora both rode the next wave for an
interference call against Dora. Andino later admitted his surfing
hadn’t won the heat when he said, “I couldn’t surf much worse than
that” before apologising to Dora for the, what I would call, dog
act.
Any way you slice it, it wasn’t World Champ talk.
When it emerged that Andino was also suffering from a dodgy back
the day started resembling a deleted scene from the
Ballad of Buster
Scruggs. Wounded cowboys lying around everywhere.
Toledo injured, Kolohe, Italo hurt himself in the semi against Leo
after easily dispatching Kolohe in their quarter and stretching the
head to head to 5-1.
Does Kolohe know that? Seems Kelly is the only pro who keep
basic numeracy in his back pocket. You’d think a basic skill set
for a pro, especially if you are a back marker and you live or die
by the numbers. Like Jack Freestone who professed to have zero idea
about what numbers he needed to avoid relegation because it was a
toxic mindset.
Italo/Flores was a worthy Final, as far as performances on the
day go. Other contenders fell away. Medina was out of sorts. He got
clubbed on his opening wave, Ace got slotted and came out. He had
to straighten out on a below sea level froth monster. An epoch
seemed to pass where Medina held priority and no waves came.
My fantasy was for Medina to crush Europe and close the Title,
just to crush Dirk’s dreams. Kidding, of course. You can’t crush
Billionaire dreams. They just buy new ones.
Unbelievably, Medina lost the heat during that period. Ace
revealed in the presser that he knew they had drifted out of
position but with Gabe holding P he was happy to inhabit that
purgatory. Sure ’nuff, the next sets went through unridden. Ace
confirmed his position, according to surf writer Surfads as the
“straight-cut Levis of the surf world with his stubborn refusal to
become irrelevant.”
My fantasy was for Medina to crush Europe and close the Title,
just to crush Dirk’s dreams. Kidding, of course. You can’t crush
Billionaire dreams. They just buy new ones.
Ryan Callinan looked the only other surfer in the draw, on form,
who could have made a fist of the Final. I always had this weird
feeling that his backhand was a tiny bit wonky. A bit folded in on
itself and lacking true power. That’s totally revised after today.
His two-turn combos were huge. That little backhand on the rail to
push the board straight back up into the lip always presaged
something big. It’s a minor bummer he came up against J-Flo in the
quarters and not the final. He came closest and his best scoring
wave was under-cooked, which still didn’t alter the
result.
I didn’t watch the women. Don’t torch me. That’s the downside of
having the women cleaved in with the men. Sportswriters can only
focus on so much on a massive day, or risk tokenism.
Carissa dominant. Riff below.
The Final was all over in the opening five minutes. Jezza rode
the wave of the event: just a glorious, backlit dream chamber with
an untouched exit right in front of an adoring crowd. Nutz for
them. Huge for French surfing, even if he is from an island in the
Indian Ocean.
It was a ten, awarded a high nine by judges to maintain some
semblance of sporting spectacle.
Italo tried to fightback. Landing a very lofty oop right on top
of a collapsing lip for a non-make. Jeremy calmly slotted two more
small toobs and that was it. Not great sport due to the lack of
contest but undeniably a mad, mad day for Jeremy Flores and French
surfing.
2019 Men’s Championship Tour ratings
Gabriel Medina (BRA) – 48,015
Filipe Toledo (BRA) – 45,730
Jordy Smith (ZAF) – 43,515
Italo Ferreira (BRA) – 42,400
Kolohe Andino (USA) – 41,250
Roxy Pro France Final Results:
1 – Carissa Moore (HAW) 17.60
2 – Caroline Marks (USA) 7.00
Roxy Pro France Semifinal Results:
SF 1: Carissa Moore (HAW) 9.83 def. Lakey Peterson (USA) 3.66
SF 2: Caroline Marks (USA) 12.887 def. Johanne Defay (FRA) 7.06
Quiksilver Pro France Final Results:
1 – Jeremy Flores (FRA) 15.00
2 – Italo Ferreira (BRA) 8.23
Quiksilver Pro France Semifinal Results:
SF 1: Jeremy Flores (FRA) 16.33 def. Jack Freestone (AUS) 4.73
SF 2: Italo Ferreira (BRA) 11.60 def. Leonardo Fioravanti (ITA)
10.83
Quiksilver Pro France Quarterfinal Results:
QF 1: Jeremy Flores (FRA) 14.40 def. Ryan Callinan (AUS) 13.17
QF 2: Jack Freestone (AUS) 13.00 def. Marc Lacomare (FRA) 12.84
QF 3: Leonardo Fioravanti (ITA) 13.30 def. Adrian Buchan (AUS)
13.00
QF 4: Italo Ferreira (BRA) 13.93 def. Kolohe Andino (USA) 11.36
Quiksilver Pro France Round of 16 (Round 4)
Match-Ups:
HEAT 1: Jeremy Flores (FRA) 15.50 def. Jordy Smith (ZAF) 6.67
HEAT 2: Ryan Callinan (AUS) 14.17 def. Ezekiel Lau (HAW) 12.83
HEAT 3: Marc Lacomare (FRA) 8.87 def. Wade Carmichael (AUS)
8.63
HEAT 4: Jack Freestone (AUS) 12.33 def. Julian Wilson (AUS)
10.33
HEAT 5: Adrian Buchan (AUS) 10.00 def. Gabriel Medina (BRA)
9.50
HEAT 6: Leonardo Fioravanti (ITA) 11.77 def. Seth Moniz (HAW)
8.83
HEAT 7: Kolohe Andino (USA) 10.33 def. Yago Dora (BRA) 6.00
HEAT 8: Italo Ferreira (BRA) 13.84 def. Michel Bourez (FRA)
8.06
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Scholastic: World Surf League announces its
“Official Higher Education Partner” in Australia!
By Chas Smith
"Benefits of the tie-up will include industry
placements and internships for students with the WSL across a range
of disciplines."
Brilliant. Just brilliant and I couldn’t be
happier to report that our World Surf League finally has an
“Official higher education partner in Australia” because it needs
one now more than ever. Just yesterday we learned that scheming,
big-brain’d Ivy Leaguers are looking into the nefariousness of
“nationality
bias” in World Surf League judging. How to counter the
potential damning that might come from a report? Well, to
officially partner with a private not-for-profit university on
Australia’s Gold Coast, obviously.
Australia’s Gold Coast is known for many things: Snapper Rocks,
Mick Fanning. Also it is known as a hub of smarts n stuff. Bond,
private and not-for-profit since 1989, will be the perfect bulwark
against Stanford, Harvard, Oxford etc. and let’s head straight to
the press
release to learn what lucky students will be getting n
stuff.
The two-year deal beginning in 2020 will see Bond become the
Official Higher Education Partner of the World Surf League
Australia.
Benefits of the tie-up will include industry placements and
internships for students with the WSL across a range of
disciplines.
Bond University student Rachael Tilly became the youngest
world champion in the history of professional surfing when she won
the 2015 longboard title at the age of 17.
From San Clemente in California, she is studying a Bachelor
of Sports Management while still competing on the women’s longboard
world tour.
“I’d love to use my degree to make an impact in the surfing
industry,” Ms Tilly said.
“My lecturer at Bond set me up with an internship at a WSL
event earlier this year and I learned so much.
“This is a huge opportunity for students, even ones who
aren’t specifically into surfing.
Yes.
I’m excited for more potential employees to dawn the WSL’s Santa
Monica door who “aren’t specifically into surfing.” They can join
WSL CEO Sophie Goldschmidt and a host of others who know nothing
about the stuff n stuff.
My fingers are crossed for a similar partnership right here in
America.
What institution would make the best fit?
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Comment live, Quiksilver Pro, Hossegor, Day
Five!
By Derek Rielly
Don't be passive and dumb. Raise some noise!
Did you know you can order French wine in four
sizes:demi (half a litre), distingué
(one litre), formidable (three litres) and
catastrophe (five litres)?
A fitting entrée, one might say, to tonight’s broadcast of the
Quiksilver Pro where Surfline calls six-to-eight-foot faces early,
easing. Offshores in the morn.
Pour yourself a drink. Yes?
Mine is champagne and barley water or, if friends arrive, which
is unlikely, a turkey cocktail: to one large turkey add one gallon
of vermouth and a demijohn of angostura bitters. Shake.
Watch here, comment
you know where and wait for Longtom’s hot volume analysis
tomorrow.
Quiksilver Pro France Round of 16 (Round 4)
Match-Ups:
HEAT 1: Jordy Smith (ZAF) vs. Jeremy Flores (FRA)
HEAT 2: Ezekiel Lau (HAW) vs. Ryan Callinan (AUS)
HEAT 3: Marc Lacomare (FRA) vs. Wade Carmichael (AUS)
HEAT 4: Julian Wilson (AUS) vs. Jack Freestone (AUS)
HEAT 5: Gabriel Medina (BRA) vs. Adrian Buchan (AUS)
HEAT 6: Seth Moniz (HAW) vs. Leonardo Fioravanti (ITA)
HEAT 7: Kolohe Andino (USA) vs. Yago Dora (BRA)
HEAT 8: Michel Bourez (FRA) vs. Italo Ferreira (BRA)