"Stopping trainers from treating dolphins like surfboards..."
Killjoys really know how to kill joy and how frustrating, in this day and age when Coronavirus is chewing through thousands, the Maldives has turned into terror epicenter, Mick Fanning’s stalker loves him or being a pedophile and our World Surf League is being broken apart on the shoals of Hawaiian bureaucracy for anyone to snatch smiles from children’s faces but that is exactly what PETA, the People for Ethical Treatment of Animals has done and let’s head straight to the organization’s press release while our bile builds.
Orlando, Fla. – Following a months-long PETA campaign that included a damning veterinary report, a shareholder question asked by Alec Baldwin, numerous local ads, and more, SeaWorld admits in response to PETA’s latest shareholder proposal that it has stopped making trainers ride on dolphins’ backs and will soon end their practice of standing on dolphins’ faces in abhorrent circus-style shows. In response, PETA has withdrawn its shareholder proposal calling for an end to these cruel practices.
“Stopping trainers from treating dolphins like surfboards means less abuse at SeaWorld, but orcas and other dolphins continue to suffer in tiny concrete tanks,” says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. “The company seems intent on being dragged, kicking and screaming, into ultimately releasing these animals to seaside sanctuaries. PETA is calling on it to put a plan in place now.”
Stopping trainers from treating dolphins like surfboards?
A surfboard is the very height of human development, thruster, twin, quad and for dolphins to be treated like surfboards is to honor them deeply.
Rage.
Unbridled rage.
Children weeping, asking why no more fun.
Dolphins weeping, having no more fun and also not playing progressive rocker/volume games.
Send letters of rage to Alec Baldwin.
More as the story develops.
But, quickly, what shape is a dolphin?
Definitely not a fish so what?
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Paddle Elo Tits Ahoy?
I don’t get this dolphin nonsense. I thought Alec Baldwin only cared about thoughtless little pigs.
Even if they hurt the creatures I’m sure they weren’t doing it on porpoise
i’d like to see them ride sharks
Only if there’s a pod of Orcas around.
Dolphin shapes employ unconventional, yet practical design features. A reverse rocker with a rounded nose, an odd switcheroo swallow tail, single finned with two stabilizer wings that help with planeing speed over flat sections and really bite when burying the rails into a turn. A stealthy all over gunmetal grey spray on all models with a blowhole perfectly placed to mount a gopro. Dolphin shapes were quite ahead of tech advancements with that nifty feature. As an added bonus, they have built in shark repellent powers that shark banz could only dream of. No current emitted, they just fuck off quick smart as soon as they sense the toothy cunt fish approaching, rider attached!
https://www.dailytelegraph….
Oh yeah?
Oh fuck! I forgot about the infamous Burwood chomped Dolphino. I think that was one of the cheap Chinese knock off’s with a faulty shark detector from memory..
What does this mean for the venerable company Wave Riding Vehicles? https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
I’ve always been slightly concerned about that claw, and wondered who it belonged to.
Looks like one of those totally consensual water mammal sex parties I’ve heard of..
It would look great tattooed on the small of my back
In 1986/87 I would do the rounds of various skate shops of a Saturday.
WRV on the corner of Waialae / Kokohead was always a friendly stop on the way out to my closest skateable ditch.
#oldmanrambling
Yeah I just noticed that claw, and also just finished watching the newer-ish Nightmare on Elm Street. Coincidence?
Cory Lopez raves about his dolphin boards from sponsor WaveJet, claiming they help him to catch waves more efficiently (no paddle) and distract people from focusing too much attention on his eyebleedingly fugly surf style…