Question: Did Oprah Winfrey’s right hand just swindle our dear pro surfing like “Professor” Harold Hill swindled the “Iowa Stubborn” people of River City?

We have trouble.

Big promises, no? Big, big promises of understanding, love, passion, pasión and knowledge. Smiles, SUPing, success.Wild, wild, success and has a metaphor ever rang so true as Erik “ELo” Logan swinging into Santa Monica in order to save professional surfing from itself as the old-timey musical The Music Man where a swindler swang into a small midwestern town with a shiny suit and million dollar smile?

The Music Man.

The Music Man "Ya Got Trouble"

You’ve seen, or are at least aware, and is Erik “ELo” Logan not he?

Not a modern-ish version of “Professor” Harold Hill promising to change fortunes while being clueless?

To whit, I’ve been covering professional surfing, as a lifestyle, for fifteen years.

Fifteen years.

Never in any one of those have I seen such an absolute dearth of content as I have in the past year plus.

Crickets for days. For weeks.

Years?

Not one bit one content outside the surf contest worth clicking on. Worth investing in.

It is exactly what Harold Logan was brought in to do. Exactly what he promised.

A whole universe of coverage. Learned from the lap of Oprah Winfrey herself.

Except… crickets.

No content. No fun. No stories. No nothing.

Silence.

Silence even though wall-to-wall fun was promised.

Mr. Plate Lunch Ashton Goggans, we turn our lonely eyes to you.

Here we are now. Entertain us.

(Also, dear Ash, try the poke bowl! We need you and I worry about cholesterol etc.)

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DavidC
DavidC
6 years ago

https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Conan O’Brien wrote this for the Simpsons based on the Pool song from the Music Man.

Dim Sim
Dim Sim
6 years ago

Why do middle aged men in media/advertising wear bangles? It is definitely a thing and it’s fucking awful.

longtom
longtom
6 years ago

is it on?

shootsthen
shootsthen
6 years ago

I’ve seen a few complete tools become quite “succesful,” simply by kissing asses. Elo’s slimy smile fits the profile. He’ll snort a pig turd if it’ll gain points with anyone he thinks can help him along in his journey to toolery. Still can’t believe these knuckleheads take control of everything (the USA, Hawaii, the World, Surfing, and now even Space. WTF. The world is run by a bunch of frat kooks.)

michelspatisserie
michelspatisserie
6 years ago

Coupla Funk’n Televangelists

Kook Kahanamoku
Kook Kahanamoku
6 years ago

You mean you don’t watch their daily surf breaks segment?

Neither.

ILikeSurf
ILikeSurf
6 years ago

I now purposely try to avoid WSL content its that in-your-face these days

Shroom
Shroom
6 years ago

Couldn’t have you just flipped the image for continuity sake?

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
6 years ago
Reply to  Shroom

That’s the part that made me chuckle most! My damned dumb sense of humor…

Shroom
Shroom
6 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

The pawsy grip she has on him is telling..

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago

America is getting swindled from the very top all the way down to the WSL.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

Never fear
Mr T is on the case
He Pittys the damn fools in that dummocrat party.

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago

Is Kanye West the Mr T for the 20’s?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

Na
He’s a softcok

bruddah
bruddah
6 years ago

For real though it seems like Red Bull has upped their content game lately.

bruddah
bruddah
6 years ago

What about the new series WSL Big Wave At Large!?!

MASSIVE BARRELS, INSANE WIPEOUTS!!

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Kook Kahanamoku
Kook Kahanamoku
6 years ago
Reply to  bruddah

Following the lead of our very own BeachGrit with the clickbaity titles, albeit lacking the self-awareness that makes this place fun instead of cringeworthy.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

This may satisfy all 3 of your wettest dreams.
https://youtu.be/zEnAFQ7rkD4

Mads Naeraa
Mads Naeraa
6 years ago

Holy fcuk, that was beyond awful.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Mads Naeraa

Chas will enjoy.

bruddah
bruddah
6 years ago

This was our warning.

Ando
Ando
6 years ago

That was nauseating in a way only Americans can be.

SSD
SSD
6 years ago
Reply to  Ando

I agree. Next level douchery

ricmatic
ricmatic
6 years ago

*They’re talking about clothes. Sounds like heroism.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

Superheroes all have special outfits?

Jim Fu
Jim Fu
6 years ago

Is Rory one of “The Living Kennedys”?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Jim Fu

Only familiar with the dead ones
Jello ,Claus East bay ray.

samwaters
samwaters
6 years ago

Don’t worry Chas, its still February–I think Elo and the Wsl will be rolling out some surprises March April May– leading right up into the Olympics–I think they’re just, ‘fine tuning’ their strategy and schemes right now– this could just be the ‘calm before the storm’……….

samwaters
samwaters
6 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

P.S.—On the bright side though–maybe surfing will fall off the mainstream’s radar and maybe they will leave us alone………….

Shroom
Shroom
6 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

Do you ever just think of dropping off the radar, dear Sam?
Asking for a (all of us) friend.

samwaters
samwaters
6 years ago
Reply to  Shroom

You rag on the Wsl but you seem like you enjoy having surfing in the news and mainstream. Seems like a pattern here.


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