Griff v VAL | Photo: @snaketales

Blood Feud: Griffin Colapinto vs Manly’s VAL army!

World number sixteen gives vulnerable adult learner a little wet-rub during pre-contest warm-up.

Depending upon which side of the fence you occupy, surfer or VAL, this clip will fill you either with horror or energetically nodding your head in agreement.

The background, if necessary.

Griffin Colapinto, twenty-one, from San Clemente, the world number sixteen, is freesurfing at Manly beach, in Australia, in prep for the qualifying event there. Races down the line, second hit, spins, sees a VAL attempting to takeoff as he comes around, lightens his feet, gently takes him out.

Pretty standard fare for a city beachbreak, armies of VALS all of whom appear to’ve been struck blind and deaf.

Who knows where they’ll appear next?

Taking off down the line? Ejecting above your head?

https://www.instagram.com/p/B9kFTUMnRpQ/

Griffin wasn’t thrilled and dressed his IG post with a Dane Reynolds quote, taken from an excellent Stab magazine interview. 

“Do you ever feel like people who paddle around you cluelessly aren’t good at surfing and can’t possibly be intelligent?”

The response was mixed.

From the VAL army,

franmerurqui It has nothing to do with intelligence and I don’t think it’s right to make fun of a learner’s mistake. We’re all having fun!

bcolapinto
Some surfing stupidity…. So, what you are saying is that you were not intelligent when you were learning? In fact, because you are the pro, I believe you should have the control, avoid that clash and explain to him what he did wrong … I don’t know what is happening with surfing nowadays… A lot of idiots in the water..

bbilro
Stupidest Person Award for the dumbest and riskiest acts. Griffin Colapinto

joelchapman
Pro surfer says “people who aren’t good at surfing can’t possibly be intelligent”. 🤔 If anything is @kookoftheday worthy, it’s this post. Not the surfer who you ran over.

Then a bunch of hits from pro groupies, and a few who don’t buy the pro surfer entitlement thing.

taz0.2
Not everyone dropped out of school, lived in a beachside mansion, and had daddy buy him surfboards. Odds are that most people in the lineup are just doing their best to have fun. Don’t get upset when someone can’t levitate out of the water to get out of the way because Griffin Colapinto decided that he wanted to speed down the line and air rev over someone. You’re a good kid, Griff. Don’t be a prick.

(One clever follower wrote, “You mean the Coffin brothers.”)

The most prescient, of course, was this.

sigg1980
Is it just me.. or.. are there a lack of pros on here responding? Lmao.. Dane layin low on this one.. “sorry this is your potential PR nightmare not mine”.. prob did agree with Cola in private though. Lmao

How do you play this?

PR diz or VAL got his just desserts?

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Kook Dahanamoku
Kook Dahanamoku
6 years ago

What IS the brightest tool in the shed? A blow torch?

Jim Fu
Jim Fu
6 years ago

Exactly what I was wondering?
A mixed metaphor perhaps?
Best to have sharp tools…..unless it’s a roller or a sledgehammer!

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago

Crikey, you’re generous with your deliberation time.
About 24 seconds is all it took to me to come to the same conclusion based on his attempt to make a quote that doubted someone elses intelligence. (Though perhaps someone else did that for him…)

Chad Jones
Chad Jones
6 years ago

just a step above mentally handicapped

nyc surfing golden boy
nyc surfing golden boy
6 years ago

please share link to the snaketales video in said comment above, thanks!

Doobalachy
Doobalachy
6 years ago

so was he meant to do the ol sorry for dropping in I didn’t see you, if she is any good she should drop in back on him

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
6 years ago
Reply to  Doobalachy

By the sounds of it she did, and a hundred of her mates did too…

Durban Poison
Durban Poison
6 years ago

Totally agree with Dane about kooks appearing to be stupid when they deliberately paddle on the inside of someone like him who rips. But this is different. The kook here doesn’t have a fucking clue whats going on and the dumb one is Colapinto for confusing Dane’s point

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

Surfs always better at queeny
https://youtu.be/uqKhGKy8gbU

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
6 years ago

kong is the very proof of the ‘duh, they must score on style’ whining bullshit, boy talk ’bout ugly…

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  toofattosurf

Agreed

Otto
Otto
6 years ago

VAL you ad’d

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
6 years ago

I don’t know about the desserts. All I know is that it is impossible to defeat the Manly VAL Army.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
6 years ago
Reply to  Nick Carroll

The immediate question is, how would this sorta VAL-foonery go down at Newport?

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago

Is there a Bondi VAL Army too?

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

The Bondi Battalion? Imagine how fucked we’d all be if they coordinated up Australia wide?

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
6 years ago

Newport’s a bit self editing.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
6 years ago

Have we reached peak Instagram for pro surfers? And by that I mean will the sponsors continue to allow the pros to post comments/posts which aren’t pre approved by the company. I’m always shocked that soccer players such as Raheem Sterling are allowed anywhere near their official accounts considering how stupid they are. Griff should have apologized, whether he thinks he’s wrong or not!

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago

He’s on 15 mill
That’s pretty smart!

bruddah
bruddah
6 years ago

Griff should’ve recognized the potential danger with that VAL and just kicked/straightened out. Colliding with a VAL when you’re the experienced surfer (if not the best in the lineup!) looks bad on your part.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
6 years ago
Reply to  bruddah

Looks like he saw him for the first time as he was coming out of the spin, no?

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago

Spinning in Australia:
https://www.youtube.com/wat…

bruddah
bruddah
6 years ago

Nah, guy was already turned toward the beach, paddling awkwardly, so Griff must have noticed that before going into the spin, or at the latest right as he began it. So the question is why would Griff commit to a maneuver that puts his back towards a guy paddling like that?
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  bruddah

And he’s also got no arms
Which makes it hard to get outta the way

FelipesFrontFoot
FelipesFrontFoot
6 years ago

My ol mate bob

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
6 years ago
Reply to  bruddah

I like your dedication to solving the riddle.

Billy Hunt
Billy Hunt
6 years ago
Reply to  bruddah

A harsh lesson life but justified IMO

Goodbye Horses
Goodbye Horses
6 years ago

Gabby is probably psyching on this clip.

Shore pound
Shore pound
6 years ago
Reply to  Goodbye Horses

Is it against the rules to mow your competitor down?

Goodbye Horses
Goodbye Horses
6 years ago
Reply to  Shore pound

No. Mowing down your competitor is considered “gamesmanship”. Gabby gets a lot of practice at this during the free surfs, now Griff does too. It’s basically cross training.

frank
frank
6 years ago

I think avoiding the Clash is a lame move, but if he meant avoiding the Clap, then, yes I concur

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago

Is it me or does Griffy look like he’s bulked up a bit?
Camera putting pounds on?

Johnny Spiteri
Johnny Spiteri
6 years ago

Pro surfer judges person on IQ level… irony.

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
ricmatic
ricmatic
6 years ago

“Do you ever feel like people who paddle around you cluelessly aren’t good at surfing and can’t possibly be intelligent?”

A BG T shirt if there ever was one.

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

That phrase will be at least a 5 fonter (maybe up to 6 fonts possible) which will go down well with the BG powers that be.

Doobalachy
Doobalachy
6 years ago

#heranmeoverto

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

Didn’t griff have a run in with the locals in Brazil too?

He might have the Manly Backpacker Mafia (MBM) after him now.

Edit: also did you see the French guy have a free surfer come into the comp area on a wave and give him a nudge?

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Too late, they’ve already left for Byron Bay.

EDIT: added the word Bay to comment

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

Michael Bay?

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Leaf

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

for blood?

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Rob Bayn

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

Obayn the law?

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
6 years ago
Reply to  Party Pete

watch?

Justin Housman
Justin Housman
6 years ago

I’ve met maybe ten surfers who rip and can put two thoughts together in anything remotely resembling a coherent fashion.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Housman

Then you must name and honour.

janeausten
janeausten
6 years ago

ok, I’ll put a vote in for Mitch Thorson. Who’s next?

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Jack the Ripper.

janeausten
janeausten
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Jake Pato

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

I don’t think he was on the current list of proposed suspects, that I could see.

janeausten
janeausten
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

He’s surprisingly articulate and extremely knowledgeable in real life.

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Yeah but I thought we were talking about Jack the Ripper.

janeausten
janeausten
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Ahh, no I was starting then adding to the list of Justin Houseman’s “remotely… coherent” pro surfers.

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Well Jack the Ripper was a ripper, and intelligent enough to avoid getting caught by the police.

janeausten
janeausten
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

..you’re ahead of me, as usual.

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

just over-caffeinated, and extremely bored.

Justin Housman
Justin Housman
6 years ago

They know who they are.

Billy Hunt
Billy Hunt
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Housman

Oh, there’s thousands of them

Choc
Choc
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Housman

Thanks cunt

Otto
Otto
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Housman

No wonder Stance is so successful. Good thing they make their socks right/left interchangeable.

ricmatic
ricmatic
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Housman

Number seems high

Shroom
Shroom
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Housman

Sober thoughts? Anything heard on the sesh dont count


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