"Defiant, smart, abusive."
When the whole entire world is put under lock and key, it is extremely difficult to police properly. There are simply not enough jackbooted law enforcement officers, state park rangers, lifeguards to make certain that seven billion people are shuddering inside their homes, hiding from the Coronavirus with curtains drawn etc. Not going outside, to the park or, even worse, the beach.
Thankfully, and if we have learned anything from Hitler’s Germany, Stalin’s Russia, Pol Pot’s Cambodia, it is that many people are more than happy to papier-mâché little swastika badges at home and play collaborator.
But shall we hurry to New Zealand’s Hot Water Beach where one lone volunteer sturmabteilung is being abused by surfers for his brave work on behalf of the state?
A Hot Water Beach resident abused whilst trying to stop lockdown flouting surfers says he won’t give-up on his mission to keep the waters clear.
The man, who wanted to remain anonymous so he could remain unrecognisable to the law breaking surfers, says despite his best efforts, the Coromandel surf beach remained a popular spot.
On Saturday, April 4, police released updated guidelines around Alert Level 4 rules and provided clarity around what was acceptable bubble behaviour – that included a ban on swimming or water-based activities such as surfing or boating.
But just days later, the Hot Water Beach local counted around 20 surfers in the ocean. As Easter weekend rolled in, there continued to be a steady stream.
When he confronted them, he was abused.
“Since lockdown started I’ve been trying to educate the people of Hot Water Beach, but I’m not getting very far,” he says.
“They’re very defiant and have been very smart and abusive and they’re making a lot of noise to be noticed.”
He says he’s well-aware that being a “squeaky wheel” wouldn’t do him any favours with the surfing community, but his priority was keeping the community safe.
Should “Defiant, Smart, Abusive” be BeachGrit’s new tagline?
Also, could it be possible that this anonymous man is, in fact, Ken “Skindog” Collins?
More as the story develops.
Thanks, brother. It’s nice to rekindle down here in the dregs of the interweb. I just can’t take this ill-informed goose posting his daily opinions on the coronavirus lockdowns.
Surf? I haven’t surfed in a month!
This however is the nicest thing anyone has ever said about me. You’re bringing a tear to my jaded, digital eye.
How many died from the recent snapper swells? Any reports of any surfers going into hospital with covid after surfing the super bank? That would have to be ultimate test. My reading of the scientific evidence is there is none. There is good evidence that jogging spreads it heavily, as does cycling. Why no bans there?
Hey, lay off Chas, he can take a misplaced and weak-wristed slap/punch on the not quite jaw as good as the best of em…
My old mate Donald called.
He’d heard that NZ had a different approach to the Coruba Virus and he wanted to know what the deal was.
What’s up Donny? – He only ever rings me when there’s a problem.
Well, I’ve been watching Fox hoping there’d be a documentary on this Chinese virus thing. You know, come up with an answer how to deal with it. Someone said you guys in NZ had found a way of getting rid of this Chinese virus.
Not yet man, Sun Tzu in the Art of War said ‘know the enemy’. I’m taking it from there.
Chinese is he? He auta know. So wadda we got so far on this Chinese virus?
Fuck all! I started working on a vaccine, but I’m having trouble getting enough mercury. Can you get me any?
Mercury eh, no, what about a substitute?
Er… OK, something radio-active should do. So what’s your plan Don?
Well at first I figured it was a hoax, you know, the Fake News Media again, but then I realized some people are actually dying you know, and if it wasn’t for me, many, many, many more people would’ve died. The USA needs to get working again.
Sorry, can’t help ya buddy.
It’s OK, I heard Chinese doctors have had a lotta success lately with a new treatment – ground tiger bone. I’ve got a good feeling, a really good feeling about this one
Fuck, that’s all of us if we can’t go surfing soon
Available over the counter in Utopia.
You’re a realist, have you seen the future? It’s going to take Europe, the UK and US months to get this disease down to a manageable level.
The virus will keep coming back, wiping out rest homes’ populations, getting into hospitals via a cleaner – killing the weak. There’ll be sporadic outbreaks in communities requiring local lockdowns. Govt’s will have tracing teams tracking down all contacts immediately when an outbreak appears. In a year or so we will have a vaccine, but it’ll take much longer to produce in the quantities needed, and let’s hope it’s not rushed and is safe.
Fuck, and I’m not going to go into the chaos that’s going to ensue in the Middle East – Iraq and Syria.
Compared to that, trying to eliminate the virus doesn’t sound so stupid
Well, in a week or 2 we’ll most likely be down to 0. Life almost normal. How’s it panning out for you?
We used to start fires
Now we just burn economies
I’m the virus killa!!
They overestimated how popular they are
It’s a disgrace that more guys aren’t out surfing everyday and telling the law to get fucked.
Sounds like a few sneaking out for a quiet one but most I know are now old and law abiding, bloody disgraceful…
In the smaller surf towns its more about community derision, most dont care about the fuzz. The opinions and judgement are just so strongs it’s not worth it
Since when should hard core nonconforming surfers, like the blokes who I’m referring to used to (apparently) be, give a shit about community derision or opinions and judgement.
I live 45 mins from the surf these days but find it pretty hard to believe that beachfront adjacent guys have become sheeople so easily when they should be publicly standing up against the stupid rule cos all that stuff about how they’re all gonna get hurt and divert important emergency resources is just crap considering almost every death in NZ has been in an old folks home.
A bit disappointing is all, a bit disappointing…
Cant be fucked with the argument but I guess I poked the bear
I dont necessarily agree with the “law” to not surf, but surfers trying to all claim they “only surf alone” “will stay 2m apart” “won’t drive to the beach” are full of shit most of the time.
As soon as the surf got good where I am, the local peak got crowded with every surfer that stays close enough to walk and some that don’t. Natural small takeoff zone behaviour was reverted back to and everyone got selfish as per usual
It looked like a fuckin joke from the beach, 20+ cunts crammed on a lully takeoff
Now the “core” surf community will resent any cunt that thinks he or she deserves to surf more than them
We obviously can’t police ourselves
Personally I don’t care about the overall community, just when this is over, I’m not keen to share a lineup with 20 people that have watched me surf while they havent
The old folks got sick from young folks who weren’t careful enough
This whole rebellion shit is fuckn lame. Way more “squares” surf than these corelords you’re on about.
And there are enough self described rebels to crowd out a peak at most spots anyway, therefore risking even something as simple as a collision or a fin stab
Better to find out we went too hard for two weeks, than end up like New York, totally fucked
When it’s over the variables that nailed NYC, UK, will become apparent.
I think what I’m saying is.
Don’t be an unfit unhealthy, person
I don’t think anyones ever sat within 2m of me in 40 yrs of surfing…never encouraged it…do you always sit and chat within kissing distance ?
It takes a lot more than having surfboards and riding waves to actually be a surfer…
Tough Geezer Alert ; )
Hahaha
No, just strategic paddling…
“so he could remain unrecognisable to the law breaking surfers” .. ahh yeah.. Also, the definition Law Breaking Surfers is a screamer- into the band name pile it goes.
Oh yay, another article baiting us to vomit out our stupid opinions on pandemic control.
I think we should all stay home and suck our thumbs until they find a cure for life.
Or just stay at home sucking at life.
Some of us do better at that than others
I’m upping my sucking at life game daily, at a rate not dissimilar to, say, the exponential spread of a virus during a pandemic.
If you ain’t suckin you ain’t tryin
That’s not hard to do
Amen, Jordy. Id rather go disturb the giant beehive in the tree next to our house!
Feels like the mid 80’s – mid 90’s punk/ hardcore music scene I reckon.
Junky, Pedo
Right on…
The book “Junkie” is pretty good though. Didn’t realize he was a Pell type.
His bio is better.
The media is the virus.
It might make you feel like necking yourself, but it’s behind in the numbers game.
I’ll take that as a compliment.
And countries with heaviest lock downs are the hardest hit.
The tagline is fine… https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Beaker!
DO NOT QUESTION
Accept or die, or maybe just a slight cough.
I had the nasty cough back in February. Luckily I had some Percocets to stop that bitch in its tracks
Burroughs style, if you take enough. We have a little gift from the Opioid god called Panadeine Forte over here that I believe is the same as a perc
Percs are 10 mg oxycodone/ 325mg acetaminophen. My old family doc was an old timer that rejected bullshit with a passion. Never pushed weird big pharma crap like the new breed does. He told me opiates actually block the signal from your brain that tells you to cough. Years ago I had a cough that went on for weeks and tried mass quantities of every over the counter remedy they had. Finally went to Dr and he explained how bad a lot of those cough remedies were and they didn’t work anyway. Wrote me a script for Tussionex (extended release hydrocodone based cough syrup, way stronger than codeine)along with a warning “DO NOT take more than the exact amount prescribed, this medicine is very strong”. Got it filled and of course took double the dose. Fucken eh the cough was gone and I was whacked out for a solid 24 hours straight off the initial dose. Nodded out for hours listening to massive attack’s mezzanine album on repeat. I like a mellow opiate buzz as much as anyone, but was actually glad and relieved when the Tussionex wore off. Definitely a bummer when the old doc retired.
Tussinex was the shit! You’re dating yourself though, with Massive Attack. During my Tussinex days (daze?) I was listening to Black Sabbath. LOL
Haha, dated and faded or should I say fated? If I hadn’t nodded off I mightve got around to putting on the Sabbath!
I know those feels. I’d been thinking about Velvet Underground, before consciousness deserted me!