"I kept asking myself, 'Is this real life?'"
Well, ain’t this just what you’ve all been waiting for, Kelly “Liberace” Slater thumping the keyboard of his battered piano at the BSR cable-park in Waco, Texas.
Kelly, of course, is the maestro behind Surf Ranch in Lemoore, Central California, now majority owned by the World Surf League whose CEO in 2016, Paul Speaker, predicted, “that all stakeholders – athletes, fans, broadcast and corporate partners – will be super energised by the advent of Championship Tour-level competition with man-made waves.”
Not as energised, I think, as from watching Kelly ride, for two days, with pal Shane Dorian and his kid Jackson, at the American Wave Machines-powered pool that has become ground zero for air practice.
Here’s a little taste, with “more heavy clips coming soon” according to a spectator.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CCwbq51jlYR/
Sometimes they don’t return. Things evolve… other voices arise in void created.
Bex on timeout and Otto must’ve just got sick of arguing and put himself in timeout??
Can’t remember how long I set Bex’s freedom sentence at.
Being morbidly addicted to posting here aint a healthy place to be so I’ll let it roll out to whatever it is. Also I know stage 3 of internet addiction is still reading every comment and I don’t want to give him any false hope.
So wouldn’t this apply to all top 10 surfers? Are they all able to pull this shit at 50 or is Kelly a special kind of pampered? And he probably was physically put out trying to keep super models happy. Maybe?
I’m sure Bill Gates uses an iPad
Is this real life?
Is this a fantasy?
…
No escape from reality
Where’s Bexgrit?
My takeaway from this is some dude named Tom named his son Beach. How lazy!
Bu (Malibu), Rinny (Rincon), Pper (snapper), Gla (gland), Poo (teahupoo), or even Eline (pipeline) would’ve been a lot better. Be better Tom!
I don’t want to rag on the kid but sheeeeee-iit.. his olds need a slap..
Top comment WP. I just read on Ashole Goobers website Derek Ho is in a coma and critical.
Really? whoa what happened to him
Dunno, there’s an article on stab.
Whenever I see that a kid has been given any lame as fuck ‘surf oriented’ name by wannabe fuckwit parents a part of me hopes the kid doesn’t want anything to do with it and bails to inland anywhere and becomes a ballet dancer etc…
haha I like it. and it made me think about a hypothetical against the odds Russian kid surfer whose parents are dancers. His name, Baryshnikov!
Every town with even the smallest surf community seems to have an 8-12 year old named Taj now. Poor fucking kids.
…or becoming the ultimate bum
Beach? Someone half named their kid after BG. Beach “Grit” Taylor has a nice ring to it. Poor grom.. His oldies really screwed him out of a nice surf parental Hawaiian name. Kahakai “Grit” Taylor has a better ring.
If I was choosing to name myself half after beachgrit…i would go with Grit for sure. That’s a sick name
Maybe for a Cowboys son.
Hey if Matt hoy can call his son Tex, I am proudly taking Grit
And he ended up being good at footy.. starter for the Knights!
I think of it only in terms of my ability to pick up chick’s, as any measure of success
My surname shares a word with the coolest predatory animal on the planet…put them together, and I cant fail
This has changed my fucking life…thanks beachgrit! Can’t believe its taken me so long
Grit White Sharkey – Anti depressive. Slayer of pussy. Seal eating winner at life!
Hahahaha, Perfect. I’m employing you as my PR man…you can put up a bunch of fake photos of me on dating sites
Dude needs to share who supplies him with his supply of surf viagra pills. Unreal shit for being 50.
We can laugh at Kelly all we want (given we have enough time in the day between wankings) but his jus de vivre is genetics + diet + lifestylez. Give me a frothing cup of guano cafeve and store enough nuts in my poon pouch to last me 9-10 North County winters and I’ll be launching front grip mid length floaters at Beacons with exceptional vigor til the last of you turds succumbs to death by face mask.
Disappointed, Drek.
I thought this was Kelly’s coming out after being reprogrammed by Charlie.
Nup – just shitty old pool surfing again …
Pump, pump – whhheeeeeeeee
Wouldn’t it be great for surfing if he came out. Also disappointed (again). And the surf is shit this morning. Day drinking planned followed by listening to BG pdcasts. They better be fucken funny.
It would be perfect.
is this his tryout for ‘ultimate surfer’? don’t think for a second he doesn’t want to be on that show.
More “Heavy” clips coming soon?
Does it go 10ft plus, does he face plant into the concrete bottom sending his jaw into his skull, does a great white jump from the spectator region and take him out??
Or does he fight Iron Mike that be heavy