"It has his fingerprints all over it, no?"
Wow, what a difference a month or two makes.
Elo looks fabulous again, tanned and terrific, million watt smile back on full beam. and has dropped an epic roadmap to get pro surfing back on track.
Of course, it’s one thing to say you are going to do something and quite another to actually do it but if ELO can even get close to the implementation of the New Era roadmap then he may well go down in history as the sports saviour, not the chump holding the baby when it sighed it’s last breath.
A quick analysis is in order.
2020 CT and Q’ey are consigned to the dustbin of history but pro surfing will still take place this year. A novelty series called WSL Countdown is scheduled for August through November with events in the Lemoore Tub and Australia on the books.
Who will actually be able to compete in those events given travel restrictions is an unknown, but a moot point as the events seemed designed to both get the machine running again and generate some eyeballs back to live WSL surfing.
2021 CT officially starts with the Pipe Masters in its normal pre-Christmas time-slot.
That will be the weirdest part of the New Era. Starting with Pipe, instead of ending, then breaking for the new year, coming back three months later for an event in cold, wintry Portugal. Which will feel like an entirely different year and start to the Tour, even though it’s not.
From there it rumbles back into familiar form.
An Aussie leg, Brazil, the Tub, then a “grand slam” trio of G-Land, J-Bay and Tahiti to get a top five men and women. A single day surf-off imaginatively titled WSL Finals gets Dirk Ziff’s wish of a Title decided in the water
World Number One going into the Finals goes straight into the Final, which is a best of three heat deal. I think, a very epic and fair way to decide.
Does the WSL maintain their most valuable asset, a credible World Champ?
Very much so.
Especially if the as yet announced Finals day takes place in, say, pumping Cloudy or ten foot No-Kanduis.
September is still prime time for southern-hemi reefs.
The online presser delivered peak Elo: he claimed with a perfectly straight face that the changes in the New Era were “designed to harmonise with wholistic evolutions to multiple parts of the sport”.
No, I can’t decipher either.
I think it was something about the lower tiers of the sport, which are now split into the Q’ey proper and a Challenger Series. The relationship between the two feeder Tours and the CT itself remains confusing to me.
The aim is for QS surfers to be able to qualify for the Tour in a single year, but I can’t see how that would happen.
The gals are back in Teahupoo. A brave, bold move. Which will likely deliver copious laydays, zero-point heat totals and a Caroline Marks dynasty into the forseeable future. Also, many back-to-the-future wildcards for Keala Kennelly.
More pertinently, starting in 2022, there will be a mid-season roster cut with the mens numbers cut from 36 to 24 and gals from 18 to 12. That may end up being the single most significant advance in the sport for decades.
Giving us a Grand Slam leg with a streamlined roster that can fit into swell events without major contortions.
The gals are back in Teahupoo. A brave, bold move. Which will likely deliver copious laydays, zero-point heat totals and a Caroline Marks dynasty into the forseeable future. Also, many back-to-the-future wildcards for Keala Kennelly.
Elo has good reason to be chuffed.
The sport needed change and he’s delivered the roadmap. How much he can actually deliver on will be out of his hands to a large extent so he’s accumulated a large bank of goodwill to exist on whilst the post-covid global landscape becomes clear.
One more tiny thing.
Taking Pipe as the start, and assuming a Fiji finish, with the Tub and the G-land/J-Bay/Teahupoo Grand Slam as the “home straight” of the Tour.
Does that, or does that not, especially with Slater’s Kryponite the closeout beachbreaks of the European leg gone, seem tailor-made to keep Slater on Tour ad infinitum?
Even possibly deliver a 12 World Title?
It has his fingerprints all over it, no?
A very, very good thing.
The thing that gets me is that yeah cool we get the best guy in big heaving pits and good quality waves BUT…the qual series will be in shitful beach breaks.
How does the best young tube rail grom get on tour v the light air rev grom in crappola?
Those little lightweights dont generally ride the big barrells that well, the system is still broken.
Of all the countless hours of shit childrens movies I watched when my kids were young…Jim carey playing lemony snicket must have been my favourite. Him impersonating a t Rex never gets old
So best of 3 heats and 5th needs to beat 4th, 3rd, 2nd and 1st to win? Wouldn’t that require him/her to surf up to
812 heats in a single day?Doesn’t top seed go direct to final and other 4 compete for last spot?
Yep that’s what I heard/understood, seeding according to your end of year rating. So to get to the final #5 needs to beat #4 to get a chance to surf against #3, then beat #3 to surf against #2, then beat #2 to surf against #1 (final). If every round is best out of 3, #5 will have to surf between 8-12 heats to become world champion.
Is perhaps like tennis draw:
5 vs 2
4 vs 3
Winner vs winner
Winner vs 1
Would def make more sense. Let’s see how it plays out. I’m less optimistic than LT that the roadmap will be implemented half decent, even if they’ll manage to kick off in Dec.
you mean Chas is a trophy wife?
4th place finisher
The only thing that could ruin the grand slam will be the commentary – I do NOT want to be living vicariously through the current team (Maybe BL as an exception with his mweoowww and line drawings)
https://i.imgur.com/RJpbqA9…
In my bias opinion there is a lot of positives to be taken from this. It appears world champs will need to handle themselves in waves of consequence, which is the way it should be. Every 40kg grom at your local European closeout beachie can get their fins out and into a reverse with relative style. It’s getting old. But what doesn’t get old is style in solid surf… Watching a pro tear into a 10ft backside pit with ease and comfortability is priceless. The other positive, no france = no hundreds of english and german surfers and general tourists with their 900 euro Merrick’s crowding the lineups in sept and October in the hope of spraying their heroes with a poorly timed, ugly cutback. Yeah La Nord is usually closeing out with that messed up NW direction in October, but, a lot of the other banks at Graviere and Capbreton have really good surf, so it will be delightful to surf them with warm water and no sharks and less tourists this year and to eternity until 9pm followed by 10 pints on the beach. The danish groupies will be missed though, thats true.
Excellent comment, you should type for this joint.
100% agreement.
I rather enjoyed the contests although the traffic from our home in Orx was abysmal. The hospitality industry will miss this stop.
Our thoughts and prayers to all the rich yuppies who bought million euros homes in Hossegor hoping their kids would live in Europe’s surfing epicenter and cross path with the world’s surfing elite….I’m doubting this will stop the tourist flow in the water though…
Yuppies, interesting choice of word isn’t it? Shall we dissect not the word but the human that uses it? It’s not really a word ever used by anyone under 40 these days, so I’m placing you in the middle of your life. Yuppies ‘was’ often used to describe those with money, those who dressed nice, those who….. face it, they were the haves and lesser the have nots, like yourself. So tell me Carbon 14, what bitter regrets to you have festering inside of you and from what mistakes do they derive from that resulted you in being a carbon copy of your father?.. A middle aged bitter and twisted have not who uses the same language in front of their own son to describes the haves…. a son who is forever burdened with a life of living while thinking the world owes him something, like you?…. P.s. Before you jump to conclusions. I don’t live in Hossegor and certainly do not have a million euros. However, I see the very people you may be enveloping with your chosen vocabulary and I think, yes, nice life you have there…. but then again, a lot of them probably worked very hard, or rather, their parents or grandparents did and now they enjoy the spoils. Good for them, it looks fun.
Projection
Wow, interesting judgement on who I am and how bitter I sounded…Seems though that I’m not the one who jumps to conclusions…I thought this was the place for irony, wasn’t aware I would be analyzed by a virtual shrink…you’ll tell me how much I ow you for the therapy…
Can I send you a bill? Half price for a half-decent analysis?
I’m your “obligé” dear hero…
ok but next time I’ll need to at least swipe that carte vitale a few times…. come by my clinic, it’s all white and minimal, a few danish mid century new modern pieces, kind of yuppy, hossegor centre ville.
Will do…hope you’ll have a treatment for my bruised ego as well…
Trust me it ain’t bruised compared to mine, it doesn’t exist anymore, every patient makes me feel a weaker version of myself with every visit.
A few observations/questions:
I don´t see too much of a change. To appeal to a larger audience they would have needed to mix big waves like Jaws and Shipsterns and Waco for airs (never gonna happen, I know) into the schedule
Ziff seems to have opened his wallet again. I was expecting a handover to Red Bull. ELo seems to have a silver tongue to talk Ziff into this. I really did not expect JBay post-Corona
Why is Corona beer sponsoring two events? are they not broke yet?
Is Outerknown actually making enough money to sponsor an event or does Kelly just want to surf Chopes with one other guy and is willing to pay for this?
Quik let go of France and the sponsorship of Snapper, instead they pick up G-Land? They preferred bums on beaches until now. Does anyone expect the major clothing brands to make a recovery after the Corona crisis?
The tourism/government partners: Was France let go because their swell window does not fit into the schedule or because the local government does not cough up the same money as Aus/Por/Bra?
Supertubos in February is actually a decent proposition, no lack of swell. 4mil and booties in the morning and few people on the beach though.
I love seeing comps in cold water, personally
me as well. We have not seen proper Supertubos in a few years
Just put Jackson on tour – fucking ripping
https://magicseaweed.com/ne…
Visits?!? He’s the creepy Uncle thats shifted into the lounge and it’s so comfortable he’s never going to leave!
Good name for his next book!
Unless the field number is a power of 2 we have to sit through non-elimination rounds. So if they’re making the post-cut field 24 surfers they might as well keep it at 32 all year (incl. wildcards) and they can run 2-day events with all elimination rounds. Better still, cut down to 16 at mid-year and they can start running each event in one day.
Eliminating non-elimination rounds is the easiest and least complicated change they can make for maximum improvement.
So it’s probably gonna be Kelly in the booth next to Pottz after the mid year cut off. I’d rather listen to DLS
Well, thanks for that Daves’ mum.
With the midseason cut margaret river will become an important event for the bottom half of the tour
Never imagined LT sucking the WSL cock. Unimaginable.
Lick lick
fucK
Who sucks a submissive cock?
Suck suck.
ooops, cum
no communication
But I laughed.
WAit, I think I typed a double Haiku…. fuck you eddie.
Oh, fuck you Hippy!
I’m not sure we’ve even met
Fuckyouanyway!
Yeah buddy, FUck!!!!!!
The finals sound epic! if someone can come from number 5 and beat everyone to win the title it would be one of most amazing achievements in the sports history
Christ. If there’s one thing that will continue to out pro surfing as a dead duck it’s more Kelly Slater.
Any way we can get it without letting him speak between or during events?
The older he gets, I love him more and more.
Mental picture in my head of Kelly these days on tour is an guy with the biggest smile, laughing, hands on each cheek, arse spread wide and just shitting into the mouth of the tour.
Next level Slater love, Negs !
Truly disgusting.
Hey, I was such a Slater hater in the 2000’s. Guess these days as a man of his age trying to find my place in the universe I identify with his struggles. Luckily for me I just have to go to work and pay the ex some coin not spend my days posting on instagram surrounded by yes men/back slappers and trying to find validation from whacking three to the beach in surf contests.
You’ll get through it mate.
Kelly will likely go full Hare Krishna when the cunt retires … if only.
I’m with Chazz – surfing don’t need any more Kelly.
Young blokes and blokettes need peers to look up to not some egomaniacal old cunt.
Ke11y’s struggles Nega?
Not being able to find ripe Acai?
Is that why he doesn’t go to the Ments anymore?
Well the young blokes need to knock the old cunt off his perch. But most of them aren’t up to it.
So until then open wide, it’s Shit sandwiches all round!
Tell me something – quality or skill – Kelly’s got that Gabby doesn’t?
The timely skill of quality shade throwing.
Totally agree, Slater is still easily in top 10 on tour in anything over 6ft.
Like him or hate him, that 48yr old still smokes half the young guys on tour.
If they want him to retire, then beat him or stop your whining.
The fact we’re even talking about tour schedule where a 48yr old could win a world title and not about at least 20 other guys on tour even having a chance, is pretty incredible. Nobody would of thought that even 10yrs ago when he was 38. A lot happens in 10yrs.
Just check out my divorce, one year feels like ten!
🤯🤣🤣
Paraphrasing Sam Kenison, talking to the Devil, “You can’t scare me with Hell, I was married 4 years …”
haha,
hell is empty, all the devils are up here.
My lawyers bill could take him on 6 Ments trips….so far !!
And thats for me to get a 35/65 split FFS.
Adulting is fun.
Damn nicky sorry bout’ all that, being in Cali sure cost me too when I had my time at the courthouse so I have mucho sympathies …
Exactly!
A 20 year old that isn’t an idealist has no heart. A 40 year old that isn’t a realist has no brain.
Throw something about liking Kelly into the mix too.
I’m not a Slater hater, and I don’t hate his surfing. I’m just bored to death of his persona and shit chat.
Lets deal, the article says Kelly can’t deal with beach-break anymore, and it is true … bad news groms it is your first thing to tackle and also the first to go … with Slater it has more than a bit of irony as the Cocoa Beach close-outs he learned on propelled him to title after title in the old days of crappy contests in crappier waves … BUT NO LONGER … anyways, when you get old forget about closed out beach-break, except at Puerto Escondido, go for those … go down and out with glory, never to be seen or heard from again …
or with a life coach, struggling to appear human. passive aggressively bullying people….so, yeah…biggest smile.
Albert Speer had some great plans for Berlin post ‘45, if only Steiner’s offensive had managed to break through.
I think Slater dropping to the QS mid cut is a more realistic scenario.
It is very possible, as the venues don’t ramp up till the last half.
I wonder whether CT’ers cut mid tour can be elgible for wild cards for remaining legs. Could Kelly get gifted a wildcard to surf any of the last 3 if he gets bumped then possibly requalify that way for next year?
Mmmmm interesting. Hasn’t been much talk of how wildcards will fit into the equation.
Get a haircut and get a real job