Listen: Shane Beschen on new orgasms-and-cocktails-tittys-and-honeybuns Arizona wavepool, “Shock waves of pleasure!”

Entire "human ecosystems" built around blue-water wedges…

In this episode of Dirty Water, number twenty-five, you’ll note the terrible absence of verbal histrionics and the laughing outright into people’s faces.

Charlie Smith, who just celebrated a birthday, disappeared for two days on a sailing adventure and, therefore, the forty-five minutes is constrained by my introversion and inability to carry a conversation without volumes of paper notes.

Today’s guest on Dirty Water, Shane Beschen, has been described as a “loner and a malcontent” and with a face that has the pitiful expression of a cruelly beaten child. 

Although a recent guest on Dirty Water, the forty-eight-year-old former world number two returns with important news concerning his tank in Mesa, Arizona, using engineering and tech made in Minnesota; the rapidly evolving world of wavepools; we later veer into the possibility that the sled-driven pool, as fabulous as it is, may already be obsolete.

Beschen also pokes a timely fork into the eye of Surfrider Europe.

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party of common sense
party of common sense
6 years ago

This is perfect, put a fake environmentalist, eco warrior like Gerry, in a fake wave, make him wear his organic wool patagonia uniform, made by a fake eco warrior Yvon “let my people surf, just not where I surf, because I live at the Ranch , and we are suing the state of CA to keep you out” Chouniard, then make him ride his Chinese made foam board straight out of costco, and drink a virgin margarita because he doesnt like tequilla. This is the spirit of surfing, and oh yeah, put him in a man made wave pool in a place that gets about 2″ of rain per year. WSL, you are something great. Oh wait……we have to have mandatory yoga class and yoga mat signing……but….you will have to pay him for that.

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
6 years ago

If Nick Carroll was a wave pool would he be a left a right or just a crumbling end section

party of common sense
party of common sense
6 years ago
Reply to  Capt Sensible

he would be a left and right point that wrapped around his chin

Capt Sensible
Capt Sensible
6 years ago

Its ironic the only cunts that champion wave pools in the media , are cunts anyway , you cunts.

Dead Beat
Dead Beat
6 years ago

I did say “fuck wave pools” in an earlier comment and I still mean that, but i agree those floating pollution palaces called cruise ships are fucked up, and should fuck right off. Bill burr was right when he said we should sink them for population control, only problem is the act of sinking a cruise ship is detrimental to the environment. Other than that it’s a great idea. It’s 6 a.m and I’m about to go to work, I’ll regret this comment in a few hours once I cheer up

Party Pete
Party Pete
6 years ago

I’ll listen to it later

Dead Beat
Dead Beat
6 years ago

Wave pools are shit, get fucked

Gino
Gino
6 years ago

Um..Devon Howard.
Something you want to tell Chas?

Urchin Sepsis
Urchin Sepsis
6 years ago

When Shane was comparing the pools to ski resorts he said that pools wouldn’t be dependent on snow, but they will for both water and power.

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  Urchin Sepsis

No no no. It’s all disconnected. Nothing effects anything else.
/s

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
6 years ago

john wayne bobbitt freeman needs to be guest on dirty water

Yomar
Yomar
6 years ago
Reply to  dickie toledo

or The Grit! you choose @chas

Jordy's pout
Jordy's pout
6 years ago

I think at this point it’s going to be easier to make a list of ex pros who aren’t partnering in a new wavepool development.

Firelipe Torpedo
Firelipe Torpedo
6 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

It’s wild watching them scramble to create new revenue streams now that the pro surf dream is stalled and dying. In my opinion the guys who made millions as sponsored surfers were vastly overpayed anyways but I have never purchased a product based on which pro was pushing the product. The surf industry is so insulated and incestual it was always basically bros helping out their bros while the getting was good. It will be interesting to watch what it becomes now that the old model shit the bed. “The world needs ditch diggers too” -judge smails

Jordy's pout
Jordy's pout
6 years ago

When I was a grom QS warriors would make a smooth transition to former-sponsor brand reps

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

Or real estate suited sales gimps

Christian S. Molnar
Christian S. Molnar
6 years ago

Did you intend to say something?

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

Hurluley is developing cutting-edge wavepoo technology to assist surfers in dropping their weaponised hi-perf payloads whilst navigating kook-infested lineups, worldwide. Fresh water or Traditional Salt. Hurluley boardshitsshorts have your backside covered.

Jordy's pout
Jordy's pout
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Will your wave poo technology help me to get into a regular cycle? Or needn’t I look any further than oat bran?

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
6 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

Go new school. All the cool kids are scoffing down psyllium husk.

Not to be confused with psilocybin husk.

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

Oatbran X Pitted Prunes is where all the kids are at right now.
Pinch of salt and some water (milk is too MySpace) and you’re in for a ride.

Christian S. Molnar
Christian S. Molnar
6 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Oh, CB, stop the cancellation cultural leanings already.

channelbottom
channelbottom
6 years ago

Apologies to all the milky crew out there.

I’m deeply sorry for the trauma and distress my thoughtless words may have caused.


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