The World Surf League’s website has had no update since Friday, December 11th when the public was notified that CEO Erik Logan and four others had tested positive for Covid-19 forcing “suspension” of the Billabong Pipe Masters in memory of Andy Irons presented by Hydro Flask.
But what would you say the is world’s most picturesque wave? Mundaka with that ancient church overlooking the reeling left? Nazare? Teahupoo, site of the 2024 Olympic Games? That one place in Australia with super blue water? Oh we surfers suffer an embarrassment of riches but I would argue that the world’s most picturesque wave is Fort Point, the wave that breaks underneath the famed Golden Gate Bridge.
And it is here that we lay our scene. California’s north has received a fine run of swell and a handful of hearty souls were out at Fort Point when one of them, a bodyboarder, smashed his head into a rock and became unconscious. Remember when we, as a group, used to make fun of bodyboarders? Silly that we didn’t recognize greatness. That bodyboarders are, generally, very brave and ply their trade out of pure weird desire.
In any case, the bodyboarder smashed his head and would have drowned if not for the quick action of two surfers, one of them an off-duty paramedic, who spotted the body, rushed over and began performing CPR while bringing him to shore where CPR continued before he was transported to a local trauma center.
The story was told, and told well, in the San Francisco Chronicle but there was some disbelief in the comment section where one reader declared, “A ‘good job’ to the rescuers. Technical point: It is unlikely that they were performing CPR while pulling the victim to shore, as chest compressions require that the victim be on a solid surface.”
Pretty rude to put “good job” in quotes, no?
Also haven’t the chest compression part of CPR gone out of vogue? Or was that the breathing in mouth part?
Is Pipe going to run today?
Mystery over WSL’s patient zero intensifies: Covid-19 positive surfer Yago Dora says, “I’m no typhoid Mary!”
A helluva lot of speculation, much of it unkind, about “patient zero” after the Pipeline Masters was indefinitely suspended following WSL CEO Erik Logan and four other WSL staff members’ positive tests for the COVID-19 virus.
The question moistening lips: Who was surfing’s Typhoid Mary? Erik Logan? Maybe Pat O’Connell?
Typhoid Mary aka Mary Mallon was a wild thing, oowee. Carried typhoid but didn’t get it (asymptomatic), worked as a cook, left a trail of dead kids and had to be locked up, on two separate stretches, for twenty six years.
Earlier today, Yago Dora, the Brazilian who was released from quarantine in Texas after ten days despite his COVID-19 test remaining positive, has announced he ain’t surfing’s Typhoid Mary.
Those are strict protocols i had to follow on my case, just like everybody else does as recommended by cdc and Hawaiian state government, if you have been tested positive and went into isolation,once 10 days have passed and you haven’t shown any symptoms, you’re no longer considered contagious and can leave isolation after being seen and cleared by a specialized doctor, and this are the health protocols for these kind of cases as recommended by cdc. Dead cells of the virus can be found on your test samples for more than a month even if after 10 days of no symptoms you’re no longer contagious. I have so much love and respect for the Hawaiian people and every year that i come here i receive so much love and respect back, i would never in my wildest dreams want to put anyone at risk of contamination, covid is no joke and i’ve been following it very closely and trying to learn the most i can about it. I emailed Hawaiis safe travels program myself to know what kind of protocols i had to follow and what my options were, i followed every single detail very strictly and only on the 12th day of isolation i got cleared up to get on a plane. If i meant any risk to anyone i wouldn’t even be allowed into Hawaii and neither into the contest. All i did and will continue doing is following strict safety protocols and i hope everyone else is also doing it. If you still feel offended by my actions i sincerely apologize, but i can assure you that i never put anybody at risk at any time. Appreciate it Much love.
If it ain’t Yago, is it Erik, currently propped up on satin pillows in his canopied emperor bed, hair a snowy heap piled atop his ruined doll’s face?
Or Pat O’Connell, whose condition remains unknown but who is still a stunner, even at forty-nine?
Breaking: In updated document sent to Australian television partners, the World Surf League points to “productive conversations” with Hawaiian officials, but given no green light as of yet!
But it did not start yesterday, nor did it start today, and a new internal message, sent to Australian television subscribers, suggests that the WSL maybe painted a rosier-than-accurate picture to its own employees.
Here is what Australian television subscribers received:
We continue to work with the State of Hawaii officials on lifting the event suspension. These conversations are productive, but we do not have confirmation yet.
With the swell declining further over the next several hours, we will not be looking at running competition tomorrow (yesterday).
Official call: NO Competition for Tomorrow, Tuesday December 15th
We will provide more updates as soon as they become available.
But what does it all mean?
Oh. I guess it’s fairly self-explanatory.
As of this moment, there are four more days left in the waiting period plus the women.
Is it possible to slot it all in?
Stab magazines goes to subscription model, kicks BeachGrit in lower spine before closing door: “For those left it will be a race to the bottom, and speaking from experience, when you’re chasing clicks, you get lost in the outrageous and contagious.”
"Think graphic shark attacks and Ellie-Jean Coffey nudes."
Stab magazine announced today that Covid-19 has forced the hand and it will be going behind a paywall. Per the lengthy missive from Sam McIntosh:
Stab going to a subscription is something we’ve talked about for some time, but when Covid rolled into town, 10 years happened in 10 months and our hand was forced. Google and Facebook take 60 to 70 percent of all digital marketing spend and we expect that percentage to grow. The sun has passed midday for ad-supported media. For those left it will be a race to the bottom, and speaking from experience, when you’re chasing clicks, you get lost in the outrageous and contagious. Think graphic shark attacks and Ellie-Jean Coffey nudes.
Outrageous and contagious.
The new anti-depressive.
But back to the news at hand. How does it make you feel? What does it make you think? A bold move or ill-advised? Apparently there will be some news etc. accessible for free but all films, longer journalism pieces, will be OnlyFans. Will you crack your wallet for the best of Ashton Goggans or take your business to Unboxing with Koa Smith?
I’ve so enjoyed trying to re-create the yellow journalism wars between Joseph Pulitzer and William Randolph Hearst, with Stab as foil, over these past years. I think the Stab crew did not have the same historical perspective and, therefore, did not have fun but glory days nonetheless.