Maybe that magical wetsuit of armor has one more trick...
Oh to be the CEO of professional surfing, locked alone in your room in the very middle of the Pacific Ocean, streaming Real Housewives of Atlanta over a glitchy WiFi connection, having Spam Musubis slid under your door, by gloved hands, all mashed and misshapen, nearly single-handedly derailing the Billabong Pipe Masters in Memory of Andy Irons presented by Hydro Flask.
A pariah in the truest sense of the word.
Then salt gets rubbed directly into the wound as love-of-life hometown Manhattan Beach, California posts a boast so hard about how chill everything is there.
Your Manhattan Beach where you made a name for yourself stand up paddling into straight-hander after straight-hander bedecked in your magical suit of armor.
Per the local news:
Beachside Manhattan Beach is bustling today as folks get out to enjoy fresh air, sunshine, scenic ocean views, and all that Manhattan Beach is! Just this morning, a socially distanced line wound down the sidewalk near Becker’s Bakery and diners were out enjoying meals at Uncle Bill’s Pancake House, Homie, The Kettle, Simmzy’s, Manhattan Pizzeria, Ercoles, Sloopy’s Beach Cafe, North End Caffe, OBs Pub & Grill, Wild Cafe and Pancho’s.
Grotesque-looking Spam Musubis and Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.
Do you remember how funny that wetsuit of armor business was?
I almost forgot.