For “inspirational people” and “great creators” on a “mission”.
Have you ever seen that movie Elysium?
Nice idea. Bad execution. A slice of mass-market Hollywood mediocrity.
Elysium is set in a future in which the rich live on a floating, verdant utopia, where citizens’ needs, wants and whims are served by all the amenities the more optimistic social speculators have predicted may one day exist, lots of glass, white curves, access to the latest innovations in healthcare etc.
Meanwhile back on earth, things have continued along their current trajectory. Everyone works their ass off in a dog-eat-dog hellscape to sustain a life of miserable poverty lest they slip into an existence of slightly more miserable absolute destitution.
It’s the kind of subtle, inciteful metaphor that would go over the heads of normal everyday schmoes who haven’t even won a single world title.
Kelly Slater’s Elysium won’t float, he hasn’t levelled up to those kind of powers yet, but it probably will eventually.
Some might call this kind of venture elitist or classist – a sanctuary for the approved of the species to live out the impending apocalypse. But it’s not, because it’s for surfing, and surfing’s not elitist, surfing’s cool, surfing’s spiritual, surfing’s nature, surfing’s pure, surfing isn’t golf; surfing’s immune to your criticism.
Some might call this kind of venture elitist or classist – a sanctuary for the approved of the species to live out the impending apocalypse. But it’s not, because it’s for surfing, and surfing’s not elitist, surfing’s cool, surfing’s spiritual, surfing’s nature, surfing’s pure, surfing isn’t golf; surfing’s immune to your criticism.
But not completely immune.
A certain amount of lip-service is still required. The selfishness of the endeavour must be veneered over with self-aggrandising bullshit rhetoric no one in their heart of hearts believes but serves the purpose of soothing the shame of living their lives not in the virtuous way they purport to do, but in accordance with the most vulgar excesses of consumer-capitalism.
Hence this resort (sorry “community”) isn’t designed for that “wrong” type of rich like, for example, golfers, but the “right” kind of rich, those who enrich our lives and show us how we might save our paltry and wasted existences “through lived and learned experiences”.
They’re “inspirational people” and “great creators” on a “mission”.
This isn’t play, this is a project. It’s not designed for self-indulgence, but self-betterment. It will “educate” through experiences that you can live and learn by paying for them with money.
So why not take advantage of the direct flights from Palm Springs International and witness for yourself our “focus on sustainability”?
Maybe after a long session of living and learning in the wave-pool take in a different kind of “set” at Coachella festival.
They’re our neighbours. Maybe Grimes is playing.
Hey, we know her husband. He’s alright.
Ignore the malcontents and cynics bleating on about wetlands and poverty and the one percent and taxes and embrace progress.
Embrace this haven, this Eden, this oasis we have bestowed unto this dry and arid desert.
We are the creators of the new world.
We are god.
Worship us.
Join us.
Escape with us.
Unless you’re poor, in which case carry my boards.
I haven’t surfed for about 50 years, but I thought the point was to harness the power of nature for an exhilarating ride to the shore that was lined with pretty girls watching.
The head line here is hilarious! Look in the mirror Beach Grit, you’re a blatantly obvious by-product of the ‘Vulgar Excesses of Consumer-Capitalism!”
The name “Logan” translates to “small hollow” so.
Right idea, wrong pool!
Will you need to quarantine for 2 weeks before going in ? or is it a virus free zone,,,,
Let me tell you about the very rich. I always thought they were a different species or something.
But I’ve met a bunch of billionaires in M_____ and they tend to be pretty good sorts.
The very rich are different from you: they tend to be sophisticated, and I’ll take sophistos over dunderheaded proles any day.
And what most of them say is the best thing that money buys is freedom.
How does one become that rich?
For example if you had bought a million shares of Tesla at the 2010 IPO for $17 million, those million shares in just around 10 years would now be worth 1,000,000 X $730 x 5 = *more than enough to live in an artificial surf community in the desert.
Or even finance and build the whole damned thing – easily.
In 10 years. Just for hitting SEND.
Zero effort other than being patient and watching the clock.
The population of California has increased 1100 people a day every day for the last 60 years. The rate of growth is slowing but the population is still increasing. Got to put them somewhere.
Might as well build all that out there on the Sun’s Anvil: There’s plenty of it.
And after watching that video of Kelly and Mason and Coco Ho taking apart Velzyland I emailed Kelly’s people and suggested that’s the wave they need to replicate in a box. If you could put a wave as random and fun and doubled up and barreling and challenging and artistic
as Velzyland out in the desert – and even improve in it – well that would be something wouldn’t it?
People would buy that for $10,000,000 dollars.
Chas with money would be just as insufferable but in different ways.
*$3,650,000,000
got any useful stock tips? something affordable and preferably not hindsight.
Well Tesla is getting expensive again.
It hit $744 yesterday and at 5/1 that means the stock is worth more than $3,700 a share.
(And that my friend who bought 3,000 shares at $370 in March just made 10 million dollars in nine months. Just by hitting SEND. Righteous bucks!)
But if Apple hadn’t split 7 times, one share of Apple would be worth $28,000.
And I believe Tesla is just as important and evolutionary a company as Apple or Amazon.
If not more so. Apple and Amazon merely changed the world. Tesla is saving it. No shit.
Musk is the first tree-hugging techno Greenie to get filthy stinking rich and that’s a major major shift.
Tesla sold half a million cars in four models from one factory in Fremont last year. They are now building factories in China, Germany and Texas and when the demand for EVs really hits they are going to sell every car they can produce x ????.
Stinkpots are history and the rate of changeand demand for EV cars is just going to get faster and faster.
So Tesla is still a good long-term value even at $744. It will probably split again at some point.
But if that’s too expensive look at other EV stocks. I bought NIO yesterday at around $53 and there’s lots of others.
Remember, the people who got rich during the Gold Rush weren’t the prospectors but the people who supplied the prospectors.
So look at companies supplying batteries and minerals and other necessaries for electric cars.
They are going to ride along with Tesla but maybe not rocket up as fast.
Aren’t there some Australian companies that mine and supply lithium? Keep an eye on them. This is all going to blow up over the next 10 to 30 years. It’s already blowing up.
As I probably said before as I have a tendency to repeat myself: Tesla is in a volatility class all its own.
Any stock that regularly bounces $20 to $50 to $100 a day and by the week is a huge opportunity. for day traders and long-term.
Tesla has bounced $20+ in the last couple of hours but the trajectory is always UP!!!
Sure things are rare but Tesla seems to be one of them.
Sheesh I made $400 on TSLA before I woke up and $800 by the end of the day. For doing Bupkiss. And it’s just gonna keep going up and out, believe it or not.
How many over 35 are truly living? Have you ever been to Vegas and seen all the 60 year olds smoking their retirement away in obscurity at the slot machines? But you keep your cities…
Elysium had an epic needle drop of one of my favourite heavy old school dubstep artists Kryptic Minds. My mind was blown when the weird little corner of the music universe I inhabit was put in a major movie ….
https://youtu.be/J5raE3wCAHs
“surfing” has been sold out since the late 50s. the capacity of self-delusion of most surfers is quite astonishing
You know with the average age of white anglosaxon male in the USA being what it is Slater is actually now closer to death than birth , so why even bother making cash he is going to be a dead cunt sooner rather than later.
It will “educate” through experiences that you can live and learn by paying for them with money.
Is this based on the university model where high fees charged to international students subsidises the costs for locals who thank them by burning them repeatedly?
Yeah, but does he still have a Chinese girlfriend?
Kellysium?
From the first sentence i was wondering how far I would get before I saw that written
Skimmed the whole article and every comment and didnt see it…so I felt it was needed
Carry on dear friends
Well the one thing we can feel good about; they won’t be building it on wetlands.
I quote, “Surfing is Gay!” JW aka Quest.
Slater’s the ‘front’ man, and Dirk Ziff is the ‘money’ man behind the scenes. Ziff owns the rights to the wave tank now.
“These few Wall Street flesh merchants seek to unify surfing–only to extract the wealth”…
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
I think Kelly sold his surfing soul long before that.
Surfing still is all of those things, when you’re doing it in nature and for the right reasons.
Which leads me to my next thought.
Will these guys even come close to getting out of surfing what we have have gotten from it??
The stoke you feel when a new swell shows up, watching the sun set into the ‘real ocean’ after a long day of surfing, the satisfaction you get when you put all the pieces together and head out to that one place that was firing for the day with no one around, the adventure of being in the real ocean, where things can and do go wrong, the accomplishment and stoke you feel when you paddle out on a big day and survive— the list goes on and on…….
Don’t think you’re going to get any of these in a wave tank.
Just maybe a nod from the ‘towel boy’, when he gives you a fresh towel to dry off with, after your chlorinated session.
I’ve been eyeing blue water sailboats. Not pulling trigger anytime soon. I’m all but done with the rat race. I’m surfing way less than last decade. Love to go full feral for a year or two!
Better have 2 or 3 mil in the bank for this. The main obstacle against living feral on a yacht are the tens of thousands of bits and pieces that can and will break on a boat. Blue water sailing is more about being an allround craftsman than a good sailor. Drinking water is also a concern: if there is none avaiable on land like in a lot of the atolls you have to bring a watermaker that will need fuel etc. And a lot of the other blue water sailors are dicks.
If you really think about this, try out crewing on a pacific passage first
Who do they plan on marketing this to? Palm Springs is home to geezers and pool boys who don’t surf. Are people dropping half a million + to have a guest house at a wave pool?
It will all sell to LA people. That is who is buying everything everywhere around Southern California. Can’t live in that abhorrent city but the money is good so they try to own a house that is driving distance from hell even if its just a vacation home.
A majority of the properties in Southern California are not being bought up by individuals, but by hedge funds and corporations both foreign and domestic. Renting is big business.