Spanish, British holiday-makers wilt as largely docile 8-foot blue shark swims through lineup, thrashes in shallows; British, Spanish mothers vow to not let their babies grow up to be surfers!

Thanks for the laughs, friends.

Sharks have, I think, very recently jumped themselves and I also think you can take that to the bank if you happen to be invested in shark or shark-adjacent properties. Discovery, television channel, has been airing its famed “Shark Week” since 1988, a 33-year run for those not inclined to pull out phone calculators. The world’s most anti-depressive surf website rounding the bend toward its 1,988 shark or shark-adjacent story here here here here here here here here etc.

A hot, unprecedentedly hot, slam but all things, both good and bad, come to an end.

Like pumpkin spice flavor, and burnt vanilla scent before it, sharks really and truly cornered the market. Nothing more captivating, nothing more watchable, nothing more guaranteed to stir than sharks.

Except now, outside the rare and proper surf tragedy, we have largely docile blues flopping around in Spanish lineups while British holiday-makers lose their minds, set to dramatic music, august newspapers like The Daily Mail declaring “It’s NOT safe to go into the water.”

Per on-the-sand reportage:

Holidaymakers relaxing on a beach in Benidorm were forced to flee after an eight-foot long blue shark was spotted in the shallow waters.

Horrified swimmers rushed to the shore after the huge shark appeared in the sea by Poniente Beach, just yards away from them.

Video footage shows terrified beachgoers watching on as the blue shark swam in the shallow waters, with its fin clearly visible.

The creature was then seen thrashing wildly from side to side and its body was almost entirely out of the water as it touched the sand.

Police officers who were called to the scene on Thursday can be heard telling the beachgoers to stand back, before the shark eventually swam back into the shallow waters.

Mothers, don’t let your babies grow up to be surfers etc.

But how can anyone care anymore about these sharks what with viruses gone wild, wildfires burning the world over out of control, broken governments, breaking institutions.

More investment advice?

Pandemic Week.

Go long.

Sharks now a sweet, sweet relief so maybe still long?