"Hit them with a good amount of speed."
Men’s Journal, which must be on the verge of cancellation with its gender exclusive title, just released its coveted “10 Best Surfboards on Amazon Under $600” guide doubling down on erasure. Amazon, the consumerist behemoth, is, theoretically, on the block too what with slave wages and slave hours for hundreds of thousands of employees but bedfellows etc. and let us examine the 10 Best Surfboards on Amazon Under $600 guide in depth.
Wavestorm, a Costco sensation, is obviously near the top with Men’s Journal raving about the 8′ model, “This is a classic surfboard to learn how to get started on. A durable design makes this a good pickup for the newbs out there.”
“Newbs” an internet version of “VALs.”
The “classic” is followed up by Wavestorm’s 15th anniversary edition, also 8′ and also in landfill ready foam. It has “a fun new design to make you stand out from the pack when you’re out there putting the work in.”
The Catch Surf Odysea 54″ special tri-fin is for those ready to take the next step. “The more comfortable you get, the more you’re gonna want to challenge those waves. Hit them with a good amount of speed.”
But the clear winner of the whole shootin’ match is one Benjamin Franklin Graeff better known to you and me as Ben Gravy.
Gravy’s Wave Bandit gets highest praise of all based on the fact that it is his board. Star power. The distinctive pineapple skull head with sunglasses soft top swings in at $350 on Amazon and have you ever seen one in the wild?
I did just yesterday. Its owner seemed to enjoy paddling in place very near shore.
Fun.
But back to Men’s Journal. What will its name be when forced to abandon “Men?”
Birthing Person Journal?
Them Journal?
Sports Illustrated?
Help.
“landfill ready foam” lol
Guys rocking up at Gland this week with Oddessy softboards goes to show the sad state of surfing these days . Thanks both to the likes of Mr gravey and the wsl,s efforts to make a buck from surfing at the expense of everyone else .
As for good looking ….. If you say so
“Is this the Monkey trees section dude ? Where do I get my photos ?”
Yeah but the Gerry Lopez Wavestorm has three wood stringers, a traction pad and a Fin System for three fins! All for $199.99!! Here he is, definitely riding one back in the 70’s:
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
basketball jone’s trunks…
That’s fucked. I have of $600 to spend. What do I do now? FFS 🤦🏻♂️
Sascha’s Urinal
Looks like Gravy married that Jersey girl…. sexy cute, get on it before she eats too much pasta.
Jersey sexy and cute is only average most other places.
gidget, stickman!
‘Dickhead’s Journal’
Underwear review this month SA!!!!
I’ll see what I can rustle up. Got some surflit coming out in the other Dickhead’s Journal next issue too!
drop to link por favor, looking forward to a good read.
send a journeyman to grab her drier lint…pick it up for burt reynolds, then, have Demi striptease (nutflixs)
Gravy is “Movie Star Handsome”?
I wonder what pronoun’s Men’s Journal identifies with?
*LIKE*
ANTI-DRESSIVE 007
Maybe typo?
Meant to say handjobby
1. Privileged Oppressive Patriarchy Journal.
2. Penis Oriented Person Journal
3. Possible Birthing Person With the Right Procedure and Magical Thinking Journal
Hopefully it’s not an “assault penis.”
I once borrowed a soft top without the owners knowledge at a beachfront house I was working on.
Caught a few waist high peelers, then took a slightly bigger closeout.
The board snapped but was held together by the deck skin.
I snuck it back under the house and finished the job before they got home.
Success…
I did not know you could snap those things.
This was about 15 yrs ago so an early type that, on closer inspection after the incident, was an unstringered polystyrene blank with sponge foam glued to the deck and plastic sheet glued to the bottom
Dunno the brand, from Aussie I think…
My parents had a beach house in Oceanside…. was excellent place to surf, no longer like many. Next door neighbor was Tom Morey.
He wanted my mom, so he tried to make friends with me. I was riding long pin tails, 7′ range at the time. Tom said his new invention (boogey board) would change the way surfing was done forever. I had no interest in riding his foamie.
In those days, 30% of guys were kneeboarders, another 10% were body surfers, people had open minds, but all I wanted was an Aipa Stinger.
Dude begs me to ride his board. Hollow day, I was accomplished body surfer and you could use the boogie when they lifted the black ball flag despite there being no crowds in the water or on the beach. Every day at 11, no matter what.
Surf all morning, body surf all day type deal. I took the boogey and it rode well for what it was, but one day the swell was pumping and I hugged mid face to get tubed, got smashed and the boogie board ripped apart under my body into two pieces.
He wasn’t pissed, but I felt like I had done him a favor, leave me alone. He gives my mom and new prototype trying to curry favor I guess. Dude, you had to glue the boogie board together, it came as a kit. ?!?!!
Never touched a foam board again. Gave him the kit back and swam out with just fins, happy as a clam.
I tried out a lime green Morey Doyle at the Carlsbad Campgrounds back in the early 80’s. Fun at high tide when you couldn’t really catch the slow rolling waves with a short board…..plus it wasn’t a total zoo of idiots back in the 80’s…..and the music was decent.
I had one of those . They came out in 78.
You’re right they were fun and rode ok
I think i had that model too. the M32 or something. completely folded it on a big south, north of balboa pier
fun surf around that area on high tides.
Not all hero’s wear capes
I BROKE TWO BOARDS AT FRIEGHTTRAINS THAT DAY! non-reno…i’ll watch it later!
The only time I get happy when I see a wavestorm is when its broken in half sitting in the trash.
I will go to a newsstand today and buy a copy of Men’s Journal, just to show my support for gender exclusivity. “Woke” can eat shit and die.
Where are you going to find a “newstand” other than a large airport?
“Journal For People Who Present As Male” will be the woke-approved new name for Men’s Journal
Interestingly, I saw an article yesterday (not gonna mention the hated site) about JOB and how he reached out to Gravy (almost called him BG there) regarding how to start a blog/vlog. This guy started as a complete joke but I’d venture to guess that they are killing it financially now. Guy can actually surf pretty good if he wasn’t riding those shitty boards (as someone mentioned here before).
Granted, they are throwing surfing in the sewer in the process but probably figure someone was bound to do it these days. Hats off to them except it adds to the whole reason I more or less stopped surfing and resorted to commenting on this time wasting site to get my fix, sort of.
If you quit surfing because of soft tops, the soft tops have won.
Let me clarify, I could give a shit about soft tops, ride what you want. I was thinking of the overall crowd situation in the ocean these days, it’s just too much for my old ass to handle. Tried many ways to avoid that once I permanently moved back to this world but it didn’t work.
The alley gets dark regardless at some point, you don’t have to rush.
One thing I notice is, the softies never make an effort to surf alone, very easy to avoid.
The avoidance was far more related to getting the hell away from everyone and this coastline. Look south.
I surfed alone in very high quality on Monday. I was less than a mile away from a full on scene at the local VAL spot.
You can cross county borders or international, most soft tops want nothing to do with what we enjoy.
Can you clarify “pegged” and your old arse for us Barrelled?
I could if I actually understood your question?
Or he was never really a surfer anyway.
Sounds like justification
Yep, you got me pegged never been in the water before. Just trying to fit in. If only I could have spent my life truly devoted like you.
Gravy has an odd hold on many of us. He’s a decent surfer and good human being. Funny how “the dream is real,” which is basically the financing of his surf addiction, he has turned into a collective cause. Nice trick.
I’m putting together my soft top quiver for the 2022 – 2023 North Shore season. This list was helpful, thanks chas!
What about your exclusive deal with Catch Surf?
https://nypost.com/2022/06/…
“TikTokers are exposing the juicy underground symbol that indicates couples are eager for erotic experimentation — and it appears completely innocuous without insider info.
Here’s the scoop: Randy travelers are pinning posters of upside-down pineapples to their hotel and cruise ship cabin doors to let fellow vacationers know they’re up for swinging. Some are even plopping out welcome mats!”
Duly noted to avoid. Cheers
Sounds like it’s time for a new badge … for Bitchy Crab
eewww