Shield the children's eyes.
Mere days ago, the world was stunned when Patagonia founder and chief Yvon Chouinard transferred his family’s ownership of the company into a trust and no-for-profit, “created to preserve the company’s independence and ensure that all of its profits — some $100 million a year — are used to combat climate change and protect undeveloped land around the globe.”
Patagonia, a multi-billion dollar darling, could have been sold, transferred to a child, taken public all generating hundreds of millions for Chouinard or his kin but he has always been vocally against the hoarding of riches and put his money where his mouth was.
Pressure immediately built on sustainability activist and iconic surfer Kelly Slater who, himself, owns and operates the environmentally-conscious label Outerknown. Would he, too, put his money where his mouth is and gift the brand to causes near and dear his heart?
Maybe.
Though, just today, Outerknown’s mass-mailed catalogue landed in the mailboxes of those who asked for it and also those who didn’t. Flipping through images of light green flannels, sustainable denim, home, small business and apartment owners were assaulted with the shocking words, “The coziest damn shirt ever made. 100% organic cotton and buttons made from nuts.” laid over the image of a man named “Andy” with pronounced Adam’s apple turning away from the camera.
I’d imagine many horrified that children were near enough to read both “damn” and “nuts.” Parents and guardians scrambling to pretend they were not looking at that page and/or breaking down in tears. Others attempting to have too-early conversations about naughty words and/or anatomy.
Marketing is, of course, a rough gig in an ever-saturated landscape. How to draw attention? How to make the otherwise inundated stop and look?
Swearing and crude language one way but the proper one?
Furthermore, will buttons made from testicles, however sustainable, actually hold?
Currently more questions than answers.
Why doesn’t he design something worthy like boardshorts with a nut poach. No fun playing the nut cracker when on the board.
Damn … maybe crude but “nuts”? Seriously, thats adult only language?
I am sporting said shirt and can confirm that it is as soft as your nuts
Troubling times
who’s fooling who?
https://www.zerohedge.com/s…
Oops!
And to make matters worse, the
move was also structured in a way that allows Chouinard and his family
keep control of the company while they protect it from tax bills that
“could have totaled hundreds of millions of dollars,” the report says.
“Chouinard seems
to have structured his Patagonia transfer with at least a few purposes
in mind,” Bloomberg writes, noting that the receiving company is
a 501(c)(4), which allows it to make “unlimited political donations”
unlike a 501 (c)(3).
The moves also mean that “Chouinard won’t
have to pay the federal capital gains taxes he would have owed had
he sold the company”, the report says. That would have been about $700
million on a $3 billion company sale. Additionally, he also avoids the
U.S. estate and gift tax, which would have been a 40% chunk of change
when his company was transferred to its heirs.
Felipe’s nuts wouldn’t be big enough for even those tiny buttons they put on the collar
T-shirts made from nuts? What happens if your allergic to them? Any label warning?
Zoomed in on the small print … Superocean Hertitage II Chronograph Outerknown (i.e. watch??) $7100 … more than the annual income of billions … that’s damn nuts plus a fook of a lot more, absolutely mental, who even has a watch these days?
pistaschios need water…so does the central chlorinated wave spool!
stay low! Elmore Leonard and Quentin Tataurntino//
https://scontent-sjc3-1.xx….
follow their fashion lead>
https://youtu.be/JDt_2UP_g6o
If the testicles were dried out hard enough they might work as buttons, otherwise they’d be like dried apricots which are still soft and bendy…
Probably satisfying to chew on though eh?
Esp if you like a salty meaty mouthful.
Sarge liked them apparently.
Biltong testicles?
Sounds a rather steep accusation.
peach pie and/or fruit pie …no haggas! no spam! lamb cabobs and a quarterhorse!
Possibly these:
Corozo nuts fall naturally from Tagua palm trees, mainly in the Ecuadorian Amazon Rainforest. Once a Tagua palm has reached maturity, it continuously produces about 15 ‘mococha’ a year, each of which contains 20 different compartments, which in turn contain about 6 nuts – a total of around 1800 nuts a year. This means that each of these palm trees naturally produces enough fruit to create thousands of Corozo nut buttons every year.
The nuts fall naturally from the tree, and no harvesting process is involved.
https://www.newtlondon.com/…
So , to paraphrase, Kelly is using slave labourers from illegal camps his set up to house them deep in the Amazon rainforest to steal the nuts from the national park thus preventing the Tayua Palm from its natural reproductive cycle and then via fossil fuel transportation sent out of the rainforest to China where child slave labourers then turn the nuts into buttons before fossil fuel transport the now plastic packaged shirts to distributors in western cities where we can drive to a shop and purchase a shirt and feel great about protecting the environment?
Exactly. Get onboard and save the world!
Blossoming the souls of the deep south, providing purpose to the poor, and made with nothing but kindness and bliss. Educating the city dwellers about tropical fauna. Supporting the struggling youth shippers of the far east, who get a boost from naturally curated dinosaur souls, slow-morphed into black droplets of western love. Mmmmmm. Cozy.
$5999
BG has been bashing Surfline forecasts lately, deservedly so in my experience. Most weather forecasts (U.S. National Weather Service, Accuweather, etc.) are bad too. And the New York Times predicted every day on top of its web site for months that Hillary would beat Trump. The odds of that happening varied between 80 and 90 percent, according to “the world’s best newspaper” (quoting or paraphrasing none other than the Times) right up until the day Trump won.
Back to Patagonia, I’m genuinely curious how their $100 mill will be spent and how they can ensure “that all of its profits — some $100 million a year — are used to combat climate change and protect undeveloped land around the globe.”
Like seriously, who they gonna give that $100 mill to? And how will they objectively measure their combatting and protecting?
Like sponsoring a kid back in the day. My mum and I used to get some pic of a kid washing his hands in a sandpit somewhere. Fu k knows if it was the same kid in the brochure. And fuck knows how my money made it from my bank account to the sponsor’s bank account to the village’s bank account to that kid’s sandpit and onto his hands.
A dollar a day would’ve barely covered all the transaction fees at the bank I’d imagine, looking back at it all.
How’s Patagonia gonna put protocols in place to combat and protect yada yada? And how will it measure its efficacy year on year in the combat protecting war?
More questions as they develop
Effective altruism.
There are actually ‘some’ very good charities that you can sponsor a child through, you can get their picture, correspond with them, send them small packages and receive letters from them.
You can even visit them.
You can even help them start a business to become self-supporting
A can’t think of a much better way to spend some of your money– than to help change a young person’s life.
Sounds like a pedo paradise
Belive it or not, there are actually some people out there that are trying to change the world for the better. and actually doing it.
You should try.
Laws vary by country (obvs) but here in Oz, last time I looked (2017) a ‘charity’ only needs to donate some tiny % of its income to legally count as a charity.
This may have been changed.
Also:
“under NSW law, third parties collecting for charities are entitled to retain 50% of gross proceedings without any requirement to disclose to donors their commercial status. “
That’s why there’s so many of them.
Create a charity in ( insert public figures name) sit back watch donations reach ten million a year.
Give half away and keep the other five tax free.
Sucker born every minute is their mantra.
Yeah, for one, I highly doubt it’s pure altruism, and two, as I said, there are so many layers of grubby, greedy fingers to get through before anything barely gets to the grass roots of the cause they’re trying to help.
Unless you’ve set it all up in advance to ensure that you manage each layer all the way through, there ain’t no hope in hell your $100 mill will do diddly fucking squat for climate change.
Somehow I reckon Patagonia ain’t bothered too much about number two coz, see number one. And your info.
written ’em off…neighbor/ tennis player~
If anyone’s endured his self-aggrandizing book (let my people go surfing), they might remember the passage where the accountant says “youre mad, just put it all in a not for profit and live off a directors fee and pay no tax”. Naturally the eco conscious divorcee said no.
Looks like he finally changed his mind!
Haha awesome info. I wonder if a big publication will publish that… See what I did there?
I recently abstained for ten weeks and I tell you what I could have glued the Hindenburg back together.
😂 Dear 8 pounds 6 ounces… newborn infant Jesus
The juxtaposition of butts to nuts? Has to be.
“Andy” has a.serious case of neck crust. I guess they’re aiming for the elephant man demographic.