World’s two most high-profile surfboard shapers and bandmate of Kelly Slater mount unified attack on World Surf League following innocuous hotel chain promo, “You continue to fulfil Bobby Martinez’s premonition. This is painfully awful!”

“Every shot of the place looks like a crime scene that’s been cleaned up…”

Four days ago, the WSL’s four million Instagram followers were gifted an innocuous promo spot for the Best and Western in Huntington Beach, California.

The Bee-Dubs HB ain’t the Raffles or the Four seasons, but what is? The hotel’s only hot tub gets a little crowded and the water suspiciously cloudy at times and the breakfast buffet is gonna cost y’fifty a head with a tip, but you’re on the beach, the beds are clean and the rooms are three times the size of their equivalent in Paris.

In the paid advertisement, San Clemente’s Anastasia Ashley, Queen Bitch on ABC’s The Ultimate Surfer and who appeared in a Sport’s Illustrated Swimsuit Issue alongside Kate Upton and Chrissy Teigen, gives a little PG POV action in the hotel, wake up, guzzle the coffee, go surf with pals.

 

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It’s a a lovely spot from the noted influencer whose face is as sharp, as pointed as the beak of a stork and who has the mysterious beauty of things seasoned by storms.

The response from surf fans, however, has shocked even hardened media pundits.

First, from the world’s two most high-profile surfboard shapers.

Carissa Moore’s shaper Matt Biolos, “What is this garbage?”

Jon Pyzel, maker of John John Florence’s fleet, “Pro surfing 2022?”

From the maker of Tour Notes and Kelly Slater bandmate Peter King,
“Every shot of the place looks like a crime scene that’s been cleaned up.”

Others,

“Well if everyone didn’t already think the WSL was a joke I’m pretty sure this sealed the deal.”

“wsl what have you become.”

“Good to see you didn’t fire the creative geniuses that thought “The Ultimate Surfer” was a good idea.”

“I heard this is the new format for the WSL final 5…whomever checks into the most Mid West Best Western Hotels, with speed, power flow and waffles to go will be determined the undisputed world champion of the discounted parking, by Chris Cote…”

“HB police dept always hits up that @bestwestern for crack and hookers.”

“Eric Logan needs to go.”

“Jeesus christttt. You continue to fulfil Bobby Martinez’s premonition. This is painfully awful. If this has anything to do with surfing please let me know.”

“F*ck ELO and the WSL. What the heck happened to the world’s best surfers, in the world’s best waves ???”

“Corporate whores.”

Anastasia’s response to the furore was typically classy, “If anyone is hating on a free breakfast, with inflation I’ll eat all the waffles I can.”

Why the passionate response, y’think?

Is there racism in there that I can’t see?

Or too white?

An intersectional void?

Too sexless given hotness of cast?

As dear Charlie is fond of saying, more questions than answers at this time.