Light your torch.
Are we there yet? Peak Nanny Culture? Nothing to do but just sit atop the humungous mound of worry, victimization, lost sense of humor, nitpick and warm ourselves in the hot beam of disapproval? To be honest, I’d thought we’d arrived at the tippy-top six months ago when a certain tasteless surf tabloid was slammed by the Committee for Equity in Women’s Surfing for posting an image of an old gal having the best of times.
We were not even close.
For hours ago, surf royalty Chris Hemsworth and his wife, Elsa Patasky, were sent to the stocks for putting their son’s face in a chocolate cake and posting it to social media.
Hemsworth, best known for being Greatest Surf Movie in the Universe star Luke Hemsworth’s brother, wrote:
Happy 9th birthday to my two little men! Only one way to eat cake in this house and that’s to have mum slam your head into it face first!! “Hey mum I don’t like chocolate cake I prefer vanilla” “oh really son, what about now”?
Rage was swift and unrelenting.
“Why people smash their kid’s face in the cake is above my understanding but whatever,” one concerned global citizen, who is clearly childless, wrote.
“Why do people think this is funny?” another lobbed, before a third added, “It’s so violent.”
“In my country this is done, but it’s very poorly looked upon because several accidents have already happened,” a fourth opined.
Please gather at the less famous Hemsworth’s house with torches already lit.
See you there.
(If you don’t know the address, DM Derek Rielly.)