"Critical information" from "big cliffs."
Well, it appears that surf fans have finally had enough of the World Surf League’s alternate universe where down is up, success is measured in ladders and THE MOMENTUM IS REAL. For yesterday, chief of executives Erik Logan took to Instagram, as he often does, in order to pat himself on the back, again, for the Apple Watch partnership which was rolled out at the beginning of this 2023 Championship Tour season.
Logan declared, in an interview with Australia’s Channel 9 news, that the technology “really solved a big problem” allowing surfers to get “critical information” from “big cliffs.”
Ostensibly, the device has a heat timer, shows priority and doesn’t work.
Leonardo Fioravanti, and a host of other professional surfers, have criticized the watch, copping fines. Universally beloved Carissa Moore refuses to wear one. Caio Ibelli almost missed his heat because he assumed the thing would tell time.
Etc.
But losing is winning in the aforementioned alternate universe.
Multiple vectors of success.
Except surf fans have finally had enough.
Logan’s Instagram was exploded by truth insisters.
Keith Grace penned, “This is without a doubt the best example of the pathetic word salad dishonest propaganda you’ve spewed since the start of your and the other front-office VAL’s takeover of the CT Tour. It’s truly sad. You and your crew will find the next shiny object to invest in and soon enough leave professional surfing competition in the dust. Only when your group does this, and the rest of us actual lifelong surf dirtbags are left with the charred remains of what you millionaires have done, will there be an outside shot of the CT Tour having a chance to be revived to respectability.”
Hollis Turner added, “Less surfers, better waves please. Can Apple fix that possibly?”
Michael McGann chimed, “Is that why we see the competitors asking for info during heats? Lol. They don’t work.”
And on and on it went.
Things did not go much better on Facebook where Logan decided to write, “We’ve been professional surfing for about 50 years now…” in praise of himself.
We?
We’ve been professional surfing?
Hmmmm.
Well, if I can join in on the self back patting, I think we, together, have three World Surf League scalps hanging off our belts. Paul Speaker, “Backward Fin” Beth and Soph Goldschmidt.
Logan’s is gonna be a real sweet addition.
THE MOMENTUM IS REAL.
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on surfline preemie watched the boarders of all sizescruisin down the rincon and gee tin bithinmain bowl rides,,,aggressive bunch~AND THE LOWER BAXK!
Yeah, also known as the “thats ELO’s job” clause
The watch might have some bugs to work out, but it’s a great addition to the sport – anything that improves the competition is good for pro surfing. If you hate pro surfing, everything becomes a target. I like it. I surf with an Apple Watch – I like knowing when high and low tide is, water and air temp. Some people don’t. Okay.
You’re a clown mate ,… you 💯 did not grow up in surf culture and came into surfing late in life
“Look, the information ecosystem on the field of play is more synergistic than ever before, we’re talking paradigm shifts, growth hacking. I gotta run, but we’ll circle back to this asap.”
– Erik, probably, talking to his kids over cereal
They say never hit a man wearing glasses, but…
It’s tech like we’ve never seen – it works in the wind!
we have no effect/
salad with blue cheese…
Fuck me dead, between this website and the podcast, how many hours a week do you waste whining about the WSL.
You know there’s actual surfing happening on the your and elsewhere. Can we hear about that??
Stop whinging about the admin, IDGAF about ELO or any other sports admins. I want to know about the athletes and the events.
Isn’t this whole relationship just because Apple wants Joe’s voice for new Siri?
You interviewed the guy and got seduced by his Vallish Botox face dyed-hair saccarhin sweet bullshit!
They’ve started putting the comp scaffolding up at Margs.
Can confirm – they’re running Gorilla ladders. Not a single Bailey ladder in sight. Someone call Cal Robbo and sort this shit out!!
here come the onshores
Where’s the live comment thread, cunt
they missed gold already!! as JMD is now chief of sport – all sport apparently
I liked her jacket made out of lemon meringue…she can tear off a piece when she gets peckish. It’ll be gone by the end of heat one.
Comp starts in 10 minutes!
forecast looked fucked but appears offshore for moment
what do you reckon elimination rds goes onshore and they wait till wed and maybe the watches work??
Can’t wait to hear Turps’s descritpion of the current swell offerings…
can I borrow your penmanship? credit where credit is due…oil & vinegar; as in us vs them!
ELo phone home
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Urgently…
stay on telegraph. stop/
You dont hear the pro,s on tour making a buck complaining about Elo , only the Bgritter ,s so who is in step the pro’s or the fans 🤔
how could the pros upset their gravy train?? they couldnt say shit about any of it – i bet in a contract!
No athletes no WSL , if they are real professionals and its not a gigantic reality TV show , then the Pros should have power of united voice via a atheletes union of sorts , why are they not united ? To many adult questions that the kids on tour can not answer , how come those dropping off the tour or missing the cut do not have a voice 🤔 except those that are chosen , common it’s so transparent.
im with ya – they supposedly have a surfers body but cant say shit apparently.
we know a joke
They get fined for speaking out. So nice try, WSL’s Brazil staffer!
Dang!!! Shot across the bow, or arco as Ramjet would say.
All is criticism is welcome at the Wozzle, for as long as it praises Elo and JMD.
Holy shit bravo Keith Grace
I try…
Are you related to phil?
Can we get Pauly or one of the photoshop geniuses on here to do a mock up of ELO’s face superimposed on top of Tom Cruise’s whilst jumping up and down on Oprah’s couch with the tagline “The Momentum is Real!”?
Goddamn Erik Logan, what a Simple Hack who thinks he’s Les Grossman.
Tftfy, ‘Andy https://uploads.disquscdn.c…