"One hyphenated word: Stem-cells."
How is it going with your aging process? Have the years made you not only wiser but better? Jawline toned from decades of biting tongue? Skin thick and tan? Hair just beginning to turn silver gifting the aura of a halo? Well, congratulations to you. Others, however, feel the perpetual need to supplement theirselves, keeping young and fit looking with the aid of modernity.
And let us examine surf legend Shane Dorian. The big wave stud, who hails from Hawaii and counts Kelly Slater amongst his very best of friends, has always captivated, physically. From the dewy “In God’s Hands” years through today’s Mr. Clean, Dorian has carried himself with a certain fashionable je ne sais quoi.
Handsome and mysterious.
But is the allure fading?
Possibly.
Dorian, overnight, announced to his nearly 500,000 that he was traveling to Tijuana, Mexico for stem-cell treatments to cure “a few nagging injuries.
He will be south of the border for one week receiving the magic beans and offered to take the aging gracefully-curious along on the ride.
Support was universal from snowboard legend Jeremy Jones to surf champion CJ Hobgood and so many had questions, Dorian was forced to release another video wherein he provided additional information. Both shoulders, both knees, upper back and neck will all be filled with stem-cells. His first day involved getting IVs of vitamins and nutrients, having all his blood taken out and re-oxygenated and visiting doctors, preparing his body to accept the life giving noodles.
Nathan Florence, the smartest man in surfing, was sold, responding, “I need to start this now our necks are already tweakoooos.” Mark Matthews, no stranger to wave beatings, couldn’t wait to hear how the neck goes.
You are encouraged to follow the journey here. Until the next update, though, have you ever read Oscar Wilde’s novella The Picture of Dorian Gray wherein a vain young man makes a naughty deal allowing him to live completely amorally yet not take any of the stain, all of that, the liver spots and yellow teeth and wrinkles, being applied to a portrait.
Maybe our Shane can read it whilst recuperating.
More as the story develops.
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anyone see that Shane is starting to look like jo rogan?
✔︎
drinking bong water laced with Boone’s Farm Strawberry Wine while spraying Round-Up in my yard, after nailing 2X overhead El Porto with a gun brought back from winter Maui.
“There’s this treatment, and it’s going to be massive”
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Kiddie juice is much easier to come by south of the border
This sounds like expensive woo and quackery.
The old embryo juice. Let’s hope it works and more importantly that his god(s) doesn’t believe that live begins at conception.
In Stem-cells Hands
👏
Seed and stem, leaf and tip..
Fucking nuts going to Mexico for medical treatment, especially TJ.
Two hyphenated Coffey words – Them-sells Only-fans.
One dehyphenated Coffey
Advanced hair, yeah yeah!
Doug the rug!
Uh. I told you to just get a regular hair-hat like Mo!
You never see a bald mexican !
Stem cells
But who’s buying?
Americans going to Mexico for healthcare, greatest country on Earth!
They extract them from the bone marrow in your pelvic bone. You receive injections of a drug such as filgrastim (Neupogen®) or plerixifor (Mozobil®) over a four to five day period. These drugs move stem cells out of the bone marrow into the bloodstream.
Much like blood banks, in the near future you’ll see more and more parents saving umbilical blood from their newborn for treatment if needed .
Is stem cell therapy allowed among Olympic athletes?
I’ll wait to hear about it on Joe Rogan
So pickling yourself with alcohol doesn’t work?!?
The beauty of his trip to Mehico involves the knowledge that his pickled blood will be cleansed and ready for more hard partying.
Depends. If it worked for your grandpa, you might just have the right genetics to run with that theory.
Keeps you out of the water, preventing injuries. Also seems to ward off cold and flu.
Expensive snake oil, and no proof that it’s effective in the way it’s being used here for pain therapy.
There is a German guy I used to know who developed MS, he went to Russia and got treated with Stem cells. I think it cost in the region of €50,000, but apparently it worked! Others who went with him didn’t see any improvement unfortunately however
He could have flown a little further and gone to Kellys auyawhasca camp instead
Purps bone broth flavor….fix all