"It was like a weird dream, you know?"

Ten days after retiring from pro surfing and three days after coming out of retirement to surf on the Gold Coast, Fiji and Tahiti and, at a pinch, the Olympics, Kelly Slater has made a bizarre cameo during a Stephanie Gilmore interview on the Gold Coast. 

Gilmore, along with Kelly Slater, Mick Fanning, Joel Parkinson and the almost sixty-year-old Mark Occhilupo, thrilled the biggest crowd seen at a pro surfing event all year at Snapper Rocks, site of the Challenger Series contest, in a World Champs exhibition heat. 

Despite the each and twinge in joints and muscles, the inability to stoop without grunting, feet deformed by bunions, corns and callouses and faces permanently etched haggard by the decades of six hours a day surfing, the five-some, led by Stephanie Gilmore, drew lines that were refined and regal. 

Although the heat wasn’t scored in any official form, in the aftermath it was agreed that Stephanie Gilmore had won the heat.

And, so, on the beach the celebrated surf coach and interviewer Stace Gailbrath cornered the eight-time world champ for a few words, as they say. 

Stephanie Gilmore, who is thirty-six and whose smile glows phosphorescently from a tanned face, knows the play and shaped a crooked grin of embarrassment. 

“That was so much fun. Oh my goodness. Joel gave me that good one that that barrel and and then yeah, I just seemed to be in there… but wow, that was probably the highlight of my, one of my, probably of my whole career, life maybe, to surf empty Snapper with those guys. Yeah, that was really cool.

“I mean, yeah, you’re watching a perfect wall and then Mick rips into one, Joel, Kelly, and then Occy. It’s just like, yeah. It was like a weird dream, you know, you dream about it as a kid and to go out there and experience it in real life is really special.”

While all this was happening, Kelly Slater moved into frame, ostensibly signing autographs for his myriad fans, but as obvious as a child rolling a rusted tricycle squeakily across the floor. 

Gilmore is distracted, the interview abruptly concludes and Kelly steals into frame. 

The next two minutes are a mine of awkwardness despite Gailbrath’s exploring fingers.

He tells Kelly that Stephanie Gilmore is now one-zero head-to-head with him.

“Say what? Love one Stephanie. Correct, yes, yep she got 1-0 against all four of us, all the other four of us… she… she… she… was just totally… it’s funny because Mick, Mick just goes up he’s like she just everywhere she turns is just lining up for and she’s just on, in-sync. It was great but you gave her priority so you know it just was gonna happen.”

On his contest board,

“It’s a really fun board. Yeah, it’s fast. If I lean too much I kind of catch it sometimes but it’s fun. It’s a good fast board.”

Eventually, Gailbrath feels the seismic tremble of frustration in his finger ejected.

Essential.