Symbologists (left) in fight over meaning.
Symbologists (left) in fight over meaning.

Symbologists deeply baffled as young goats crash Kelly Slater baby shower

"What can it possibly mean?"

Symbologists, worldwide, were forced to take a break from deciphering Kendrick Lamar and Drake lyrics, yesterday, in order to attempt an understanding of surf great Kelly Slater’s Australian baby shower. The 11x world champion is currently on the Gold Coast with longtime, and pregnant, girlfriend Kalani Miller. The later took to social media with pictures of the event, which took place in gorgeous Byron Bay, writing, “Wow, where do I even begin?! My Australian family threw the most beautiful baby shower for the little one. It was an unforgettable misty rainy day in the hinterland of Byron Bay with the most thoughtful details full of love…”

Hearts full etc.

And gorgeous save one utterly baffling detail.

Baby goats had appeared to invade.

Early speculation centered around someone in the hinterland leaving a paddock gate open allowing for the kids to crash the party though that theory was quickly squashed by local farmers who thought such a potential accident impossible. The conundrum was then kicked to the aforementioned symbologists who pressed pause on “6:16 in LA” and “Meet the Grahams” to puzzle out meaning.

At time of writing, they are all stumped and requesting help.

David Lee Scales and I might have been able to provide some though got derailed with other topics including, but not limited to, leash tugging and homosexuality in professional surfing.

I think you’ll find it very pleasant.

Back to Lamar v. Drake, though. Where are you on that one? Team Compton or Team OVO?


Canadian surf sensation Erin Brooks stuns world with “best barrel by a woman ever.”

“That would have been a ten for the guys! That was insane.”

The Texan-born and newly-minted Canadian Erin Brooks has cemented her place in surfing lore after a ten-point ride at Snapper Rocks that officially ended a forty-year perception that women couldn’t ride tubes on their backhand.

Erin Brooks, who its sixteen, was bred to shred, as they used to say.

She moved from Texas to Hawaii when she was nine, surfed Teahupoo at eleven, was taking off on ten-foot Sunset peaks at thirteen and was the youngest ever competitor invited to surf in the Padang Padang Cup.

And, earlier today at Snapper Rocks, Erin Brooks threaded a legitimate top-to-bottom drainer earning her a unanimous ten-point ride from the judges. Not only did it supersede every backside tube by a woman ever filmed, free surf or contest, but it opened the door to a new era of gal’s surfing.


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Erin Brooks gift-wrapped the day by winning the entire event. She now leads the Challenger Series ratings, a six-event feeder system for the top-rung Championship Tour.

Commentary, naturally, was alive with praise for Ms Brooks.

“Insane!” wrote Nathan Florence.

Rio Wada, “Tbh that’s 20.”

Teahupoo standout Eimeo Czermak, “Best 10 ever for girls.”

Leo Fioravanti, “Most technical barrel I’ve ever see by a girl on their backhand. Erin Brooks, you’re next level.”

Jackson Dorian, “That would have been a ten for the guys! That was insane.”

Kai Lenny, “That was insane.”

Fisher, “EPIC.”

Sky Brown, “Mind blown.”

The last time Erin Brooks was on this pages was in January during the wild imbroglio over her Canadian citizenship.

Following the “cruel and sadistic” rejection of effort to represent Canada at Paris 2024, the country’s immigration minister Marc Miller did a switcharoo and gifted the kid her prized new passport.

Heartbreak as authorities confirm discovery of slain Australian surfers in Mexico

A dark day.

Mexican authorities are now officially confirming that three dead bodies discovered earlier in the day, roughly 130 miles from the United States’ border, belong to two missing Australian surfers and their American friend. Callum and Jake Robinson, originally from Western Australia, and San Diego-based Jack Carter Rhoad had traveled south in order to surf around Ensenada and Rosarito. Concern was first floated when they failed to check into their vacation rental near K38.

While the brothers’ mother took to social media pleading for any help, the story took an ominous turn when the white Chevrolet pick-up the three had been traveling in was found burned. Later, their tents were discovered abandoned.

The bodies were discovered in an isolated area near La Bocana though officials say it is too early to determine cause of death.

Three persons have been arrested in association with the case thus far including a woman who had one of the surfer’s phones.

Baja California Attorney General María Elena Andrade Ramírez declared that authorities lost valuable time because the men were not immediately reported missing. The last word the family had was six days ago though anyone who has traveled, or camped, knows that communication is not always constant.

It is a sad day for the Robinsons and Rhoads, certainly, but also surfers everywhere.


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Truck Australian brothers and American friend were traveling in found burned on a ranch near Ensenada.
Truck Australian brothers and American friend were traveling in found burned on a ranch near Ensenada.

Tents of missing Australian surfers found abandoned on Baja beach

"All lines of investigation are open at this time. We cannot rule anything out until we find them."

The story of two Australian surfers and their American friend who went missing on a surf trip to Baja California took a troublesome turn, today, as authorities have said they have found their tents, abandoned on the beach, along with other “evidence.”

Three people have, thus far, been arrested in connection to the disappearance as answers continue to be sought.

Brothers Jake and Callum Robinson, along with Jack Carter Rhoad, traveled south of the border to enjoy a little swell near Ensenada. After they failed to check in to their Rosarito accomodations, alarm bells were sounded.

Brothers Jake and Callum Robinson
Australian brothers Jake and Callum Robinson

Initially, a woman was arrested who was said to have one of the brother’s phone and drugs. Later, the burnt out shell of the truck was discovered on a ranch near Ensenada leading to the arrests of two men. One of them was “in a relationship” with the woman.

Andrade Ramírez, the state’s chief prosecutor, shared with local news, “A working team (of investigators) is at the site where they were last seen, where tents and other evidence was found that could be linked to these three people we have under investigation. There is a lot of important information that we can’t make public. We do not know what condition they are in,” she added. “All lines of investigation are open at this time. We cannot rule anything out until we find them.”

The unfolding drama continues to highlight growing cartel unrest in the region. Australia’s Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade has issued a stern warning to any foreign nationals in Mexico.