"Where have all our celebrities gone?"
This is, let us not forget, almost surfing’s grandest ever moment. The Paris Olympics are mere weeks away, now, and our Pastime of Kings™ will certainly be front and center. Oh sure, the City of Light boasts more beauty than almost anywhere on earth what with the Tour Eiffel, Cathedral Notre Dame, Arc de Triomphe, Louvre and Oscar Niemeyer’s Communist Party HQ but do any of them actually beat the Cave of Skulls?
Yes, the surfing portion of the Games will be conducted halfway across the world at Teahupoo and the second most picturesque wave in the world (after Mundaka) just so happens to be running the Tahiti Pro right now with swell theoretically on the way.
The World Surf League Public Relations Chiefs must certainly have been frothing at the mouth, bringing celebrities not named Kaipo Guerrero to the End of the Road in order to tease the lusciousness just ahead of Paris ’24 in order to sell organized professional surfing to the Saudis.
Alas.
News, today, is that every celebrity, save the aforementioned Guerrero, is in Monaco for the Grand Prix.
Per the BeachGrit of popular culture TMZ:
The 2024 Monaco Grand Prix got some of Hollywood’s biggest and brightest revving their engines … with actors, models and more rushing to Europe to watch the action.
Joe Jonas and Anya Taylor-Joy both put on their Sunday best for race day … while Academy Award winner Jared Leto looked downright tranquil with a peace sign up and his sheer shirt on.
Supermodel Emily Ratajkowski left little to the imagination in a barely there bra underneath a leather racing jacket … ready to model for the Formula 1 circuit any day now it seems.
Even littler could have been left to the imagination had Ratajkowski been bobbing in the Teahupoo channel.
Dirk Ziff, WSL owner and a billionaire, certainly angry.
Will he be able to position his holding for Saudi sale in time?
Can Joe Jonas bob?
More as the story develops.
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Whoever wrote this is sad, but not as sad as the comments lol. Humanity has hit rock bottom & the news, class of people, & even talk topics prove my point.
I think when human beings can get back to caring about survival was a thing, we can start contributing to the gene pool again…
This proves beyond any shadow of a doubt that beach grit and the WSL have no real value to the surf community, they have no care or concern for the art, the sport, the symbolism, the ecology, the representation that surfing actually holds. The fact an article was written, poorly I would add, on the soul matter of “celebrities” attending one event over another … in the 90s …. Dorian, Slater, Reynolds, Occhilupo, Machado, Curren, Irons, Hamilton, are all legends of surfing quite literally, and there were no concerns of crowds, celebs, billionaire affiliates, etc… financial concerns were of concern I’m sure, but never took priority over the sport .. now in the shadow of Logan, and the loquatious lividity within poor conceptual writing of Beachgrit, Surfing is lost … no more an afterthought of commercial industrialism. They can’t seem to stop themselves.
Just go for a surf buddy.
Only an internet surfer knows the feeling
The best sarcasm is when you don’t know it’s sarcasm.
This ain’t Literal Grit, man
Good!
Fun Fact: Dirk Ziff is the owner of over 100 1958-1960 sunburst Gibson Les Paul Standards, of the 1,500 made. Each guitar is worth between $300,000.00- $650,000.00 in today’s market. Dirk can play the guitar even better than he surfs!
I have a big mansion, forget the price—ain’t never been there, they tell me it’s nice.
I bought a doomed surf league, they tell me it’s nice.
It keeps my wife happy, and nice.
They say I’m crazy, but I have a good time.
(great tax write off and Natasha’s happy too—win win)
Life’s been good to me so far.
Dirk Ziff
You could of at least mentioned that F1’s Ryan Callinan got second FFs !
Clearly F1’s Heeewwwwwwwing.
Cunt.
Xox
F1’s Owen Wright continuing to blame everything other than himself whilst the flame slowly burns out, having not won the premier event since pre-covid years.
This Tahiti forecast keeps getting better. I’d normally be chode red with anticipation, but she’s going to try finish it before it arrives, isn’t she? Her. Your one.
What Tahiti needs right now is a decent uprising.
Those kanaks know how to be cunty.
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I care about emily ratatouille about as much as I care about griffin pinocolada
I care deeply for Emily, but for reasons cropped-out of the above pic.
She used to be my#1. I find her great up until the point she is asked to smile. I have moved onto Dua Lipa.
She’s hot in an 8•5 sorta way
The way she speaks with that accent of hers.. Oohh lordy…gives her an extra point for me.
Biden was at the Las Vegas GP.
BINGO!!
God bless petrochemicals
this story’s not developing, chas.
it’s best to say your goodbyes to it now, like Charlie did with the mouse in Flowers for Algernon