Your coked up, Red Bull-fueled-hysterical-trampoline-park surfing-attempts stage is long over, thank God.
Consider Kelly Slater’s famous quote : “I don’t consider my age, I ignore it”.
And so, inspired by this quote and the great man himself, here are 25 good reasons why the ages between 50 and 60 years old are the best time to be alive as a surfer.
- At this age, you know better.
- Your surfing dreams have been realized. They no longer define you, they are you.
- You have the money to go on annual boat trips with your best mates.
- During that boat trip, your wife is stoked to be rid of you.
- During that boat trip, if you are divorced, your new hot, much younger girlfriend is stoked to be rid of you.
- During that boat trip, you can surf when you want and how you want and with whom you want and drink as much beer as want.
- During that boat trip, your friends and you are all grown-up enough to not drop in on each other.
- Your kids are old enough to surf the kind of waves you like with you.
- You are now a gentleman surfer who has proved his point and now surfs the wave, not just his board.
- And speaking of boards, with today’s tailor-made designs, you can now ride age-appropriate surfboards with guiltless style and aplomb.
- Your coked up, Red Bull-fueled-hysterical-trampoline-park surfing-attempts stage is long over, thank God.
- You can scare the hell out of any youths in the line-up if you choose to do so.
- You can afford to surf any wave pool you want. Some of you can build your own.
- You don’t need to have any photos or videos of you surfing anymore. It’s the last thing you need, and you know it.
- You have already filled your life’s allotment of waves. Any good ride from here on is cream.
- You can close down your own social media feed. Nobody is interested anymore.
- If you stay fit, your surfing can contribute to a new energized approach to the bedroom. (Will the Silver fox please report to the boudoir).
- If married, women are no longer a distraction. You only have to deal with one.
- You are now a wise man in the line-up, not a wise ass.
- You can draw surfing inspiration from mythical heroes and nobody will give you any shit about it.
- As a matter of fact, at this age, the only person that need give a shit about your surfing is you.
- You have reached an age of maturity and it shows in your more meaningful, reflective approach.
- Your wetsuits and booties are clean and dry and easier to get into in the morning.
- You have a dependable car to get you to your local. (Both the surf spot and the bar.)
- And finally, finally, you are allowed to relate to Kelly Slater.