“I don’t think any human should be in the ocean” Bethany Hamilton quits surfing after second shark attack

“I don’t think any human being should be in the ocean, in the shark’s territory. It's their space."

Despite the confusion of multiple time zones, April Fools Day was well celebrated by multiple surfing accounts these past two days with very good efforts from Matt Biolos, Empire Ave and shark attack survivor turned anti-trans-gals-in-sports campaigner Bethany Hamilton. 

Matt Biolos aka Bear Jew aka world’s most popular shaper although that title has been threatened by the ambidextrous Firewire wizard Dan Mann, fooled many with his Lost x Hermes collaboration. 

Lost Surfboards is incredibly proud to present a pinnacle pairing with Parisian purveyors of exquisite elegance…@hermes.
Explore The Art Of Living Beautifully——
Embrace Luxury Through Unique Designs That Stand The Test OfTime——
Experience Bespoke Surfboard Design With This Carefully Curated Collection Of Custom Made @lostsurfboards Featuring Hand Printed Silk Scarves Skillfully Laminated Into The Deck Of The Iconic Puddle Jumper

Hand Shaped By Master Surfboard Craftsman, Mayhem
-Tantalizing Transparent Emerald Tinted Resin Fiberglass
-Skillfully Adorned With Glittering 14 Carrot Gold Leaf Logo Embellishments———Meticulously Made Virgin Leather Leg-ropes, with Hand Stamped, Gold Plated Hardware.
One Of One Flawlessly Crafted Leather Carrying Case Emblazoned With Embossed Branding And Secured For Travel By 14 Carrot Gold Old World Buckle Hardware.
DM To Enter Lottery Of Eligibility
Serious Inquiries Only Please.

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Industry news page Empire Ave also used Lost Surfboards except with a clever Lego twist. 

…Lost Surfboards x LEGO® – Snap n’ Wrap

Shape your own surfboard? Now you can simply snap one together! The new …Lost x LEGO® Snap n’ Wrap is based off of Mayhem’s popular Driver 3.0 model and comes in a full-scale size you can actually surf on.

This unique design is made from specially-developed, high-density foam blocks which click together just like regular LEGO®. Once assembled, you then take it to your closest …Lost Surfboards location to be PU wrapped and sealed. The result is a fully rideable weapon you can tell everyone you made yourself.

“This collab was so much fun to put together… if you’ll pardon the pun,” says Matt ‘Mayhem’ Biolos about the release. “I’ve loved LEGO® forever, so to work with them on something was a dream come true. We used technology from our Lib Tech collection and brought it across into this for a fully functional design. If only they could have done the same for the Millenium Falcon set I got as a kid. Imagine.”

Full interview, article and imagery available on the site.

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All very good, but nothing on trad mom Bethany Hamilton telling fans she’d been attacked by a shark for a second time and was therefore quitting the sport for good, and leaving it all for the ocean’s rightful owners, sharks.

“This is a hard decision but after having a second shark, thankfully I didn’t lose a leg I’m still here, but I am going to put my surfboards away. I’m quitting surfing. I don’t think any human being should be in the ocean, in the shark’s territory. 

“It’s their home. We should be giving them space. 

“So I think y’all should consider staying out of the ocean. Sharks are dangerous and you know, I of all people should know.” 

Many important and empathetic ie retarded comments followed. 

It sounds like you’ve made a wonderful decision for yourself and you’re giving people very good advice. God bless you, keep you safe and healthy for the rest of your life. You have a beautiful family and you can enjoy all your time and so many many many many many things with them!

GLAD U ARE SAFE!!! GLAD YOU ARE MAKING THIS DECISION. I BELIEVE THE SAME AS YIU… ITS THEIR ENVIRONMENT NOT OURS

Your incredibly strong Bethany Amazing Race,I mean those are like Fear Factor challenges! I don’t know when we were younger (Oceanside,California never seen sharks. Once in awhile there was green fluorescent color they was shark repellent.? I remember hearing  Kelly S. Saying sharks just take a bite and go away but alligators is a different story! Yeah they are and now so many sharks time for something because we gotta respect every thing but we’re on da earth it’s ours to. So I don’t know?

etc. 

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A post shared by Bethany Hamilton (@bethanyhamilton)

What’s the dumbest April Fool you’ve been stung by?