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Jetski terrorist
Sex Lord on eighties ski gives hell to foil surfers.

Masked Man on Jet-Ski Terrorises Foil Surfers in Sleepy Aussie Town

Tyres deflated, sinister notes left on windshields and jetski theatre!

A weekend foil contest in that prettiest of Australian surf towns, South West Rocks, also notable for hosting the country club where surf star Chris Davidson was killed in a one-punch assault, has turned the joint upside down after locals went on a bit of a heater, deflating competitors’ tyres, leaving threatening notes and, in a wonderful piece of theatre, launching a balaclava-wearing man on a jet-ski to deliver warnings to competitors mid-heat.

Last weekend, y’see, 100 competitors in the fast-growing sport of foiling, where men and woman glide god-like above the waves, descended on this small coastal town on New South Wales’ Mid North Coast for three days of competition.

The event, held May 8 through May 10, called Foilfest 2026, brought foilers and their families to the sheltered waters of Trial Bay.

“The conditions that lack the pulse needed for surfing are perfect for foiling,” one organiser explained to the Macleay Argus, describing the site selection as a deliberate effort to avoid conflict with local shredders.

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Then someone drained the tyres.

While competitors’ vehicles were parked at Gap Beach, several returned to find their tyres deflated and notes left on their windscreens.

The messages were not welcoming.

Then, man on a jet-ski approached competitors wearing a balaclava and issued threats of “ramifications” before accelerating away.

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No one called the cops, which is pretty cool, I think.

“There is always localism, and it is disappointing that some take matters into their own hands,” said one competitor, who asked not to be identified. “It is unnecessary and unpleasant. I doubt it will deter the positive vibe felt by everyone who attended, though. We had a great weekend. Thank you, South West Rocks.”

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NEGATRON

Get the QS on the tourism money and really push that tour then have the CT on the subscription.

NEGATRON

It’s just a wave, not my child.

NEGATRON

Six of one, half dozen of the other.

NEGATRON

I guess we will see no high performance surfing then. Oh well, bring on Rio!

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

same here.
I can watch rec surfers flub turns.

@TheRealJackMeoff

The frustration they feel when they haven’t figured it out makes for great viewing.
plenty opportunity out there, Gabe going to light it up I reckon.

Barrelled

Pomer will do anything for $$.

justiceminister

Foiling and failing has a symbiotic feel to it.

Rocks local

had an interesting convo today w/ a guy who told me he learned to surf at 36 while spending a few weeks on Kauai — then lived a couple months on the big island, then another couple on Maui, found people to take him out at every spot , now looking to get some whenever he can.

unrelated, he played football at an SEC school and then in the NFL. Is 6ft 8inches, played at 270lbs, probably around 260 now.

Did not call him a VAL.

Looking to sign him up for all my future surf trips, never know when you might need some muscle in the lineup , plus he’s pretty stoked on it all so won’t be nearly as whiny as this crowd

NEGATRON

It’s the only way we might get a tour in all a+ waves. Unless of course Surfing trends again and the industry goes ballistic. (which I don’t really want to happen}

@TheRealJackMeoff

Everyone crying about Manu but it looks like a good challenge.
I enjoy watching the pros navigate difficult shit.

NEGATRON

It’s a super “fun” high performance wave. Some sick barrels yesterday too.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c… Yesterday.

Barrelled

Is that Manu, Whale Bay, or Indies?

NEGATRON

Manu.

Hippy

Indies is real

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

looks like that initial ledge section stands up then it goes to a slopey, sectiony shoulder with weird fat sections that make even pro surfers look like they are stuck in second gear.

Which is why the judges will be so important.

They might pay 1 or 2 big turns on the outside on basically close-outs.

If that is the case, we will hardly see the entire wave ridden.

NEGATRON

Surf for the contest will be completely different than what we’re seeing currently. (Which is akin to a fresh junky south swell at Lennox) It certainly ain’t going to be flash start, but small Manu is fun as to surf.
Surfers will sent a text from the Head Judge on the morning or eve of the contest, but there’ll be nothing new or of interest to report. Whoever exceeds the imagination of whats about to happen on a wave will get good scores. It’s not like they say “we will be rewarding round house cut backs because it’s fat” then punish those that don’t do roundhouses.

longtomssecondcuztwiceremoved

You’ve missed my point.
Not to worry, I may be wrong anyway.

We’ll see what transpires.

90% of all the footage of Manu Bay so far that I’ve seen looks similar.

I’m yet to see one of these small, super rippable days.

BograilCutback

I have a funny feeling that Luana Silva might not be leading after this event

Beef & Beer

Homo-chariots is what we called jetskiers about 20 yrs ago when I was forced to bottle at least one for speeding past too close while I was dinghy fishing.
And homo-chariots is what I call them today (unless they’re being used for a life/community saving purpose in an emergency, obviously).

Am yet to meet a foiler (without substances and a lighter) in real life, though can imagine they’re similar or worse…

P.S.
Maybe it was Willem Powerfish, or a FIFO bogan with an LV ski-mask tattoo.

Sean Connery

Homo-chariots. Lmao. I am under the assumption that 99% of foilers do it because thats the only way they can get a wave.

Gil Gunderson

You’ll be back.

They always come back.

Barrelled

Didn’t even last an hour.

Gil Gunderson

That’s what she said

Occy's Nostril
deeks

is this from Diehard 2 ?

Occy's Nostril

Where is Strider????? Concern for welfare. Whos gunna sit in the shallow end of the wave pool and commentate.?

Sellme fitzgobbins

Range rovers tyres let down easily enough

deeks

Most of those dumb cunts wouldn’t know they’re driving on 3 flats

I am a Crayfish Popsicle

Thank fuck you have not commissioned a Graphic Novel

Occy's Nostril

We need the ASP 90’s Novel. Unsensored would be a best seller. Sarge, Herring, Occy, any cunt know how to write a book???

Occy's Nostril

We will prevail. God bless WSL & Joey Turdpel. This next comps gunna be an absolute shit show. Hopefully heat losers have to do one round in the the ring from some cunt from the Mongrel Mob. ” look that up Joe”

deeks

Cage fight with Tyler and 14 inchers. I’m the bookie

Occy's Nostril

Yes!!!! Double dong hammers. Think Pyzel is shaping her a thick 8 incher. Shapers challenge might get interesting

Occy's Nostril

Ar yes my fine cunt. We did a trip through Mexico in the 90’s. 5 guys a fucked up van we bought in the States much fun and mayhem. We what would now be called bullied, harrassment and possibly sexually assualted each other the entire trip to much fun & delight. Non of us have PTSD or court cases pending. Life long mates. And very few photos to prove it. NO LIKES. The worlds gone to the soft cunts…


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