Clapping hands emoji.
There is a scourge in the lineup, these days. A great and upsetting evil. Namely, men paddling up to women and giving unsolicited surfing advice. The ugliness was pushed to the forefront of the conversation two-ish weeks ago when Jana Barrett, a fitness and movement coach who boasts 85k followers on Instagram, took to the platform to share, “A man I’d never met shouted ‘paddle harder’ at me in the surf last week. And it made me furious! I didn’t ask for his advice. I don’t know him and he doesn’t know me… what’s happening in my body or what I’m recovering from. But he felt completely entitled to tell me how to surf.“
Barrett went on to describe, in detail, why the act was so egregious and received much support, via Instagram comments, though some thick-skulled neanderthals failed to understand and posited the unsolicited-advice-giver was just trying to be helpful etc.
Enter Tommy Pierucki. The noted longboard photographer decided to help the foolish by providing a can’t-misunderstand guide for the proper way to give a woman unsolicited surfing advice via an Instagram carousel. The first image depicted a pansexual surfboard, eyes closed, fist raised. The second slide was…. blank as were the third, fourth and fifth.
The message dawning on even the densest of men toward the end. There is never an occasion, or proper way, to give a woman unsolicited surfing advice.
Support, in the comments, was robust but there were still a few men attempting to justify unsolicited advice giving. The Longboardarian, for example, sharing, “Now here’s the thing, some people, men and women are down with some level of advice bc they are eager to get better. I’ve found. Then there’s that lady that gave me a stink eye because I suggested she move her body back a few inches when she was paddling, as I could see that she was gonna pearl on her next wave.”
He was quickly slapped down by others, including Pierucki, who offered, “Maybe we don’t give advice to anyone that doesn’t ask for it?”
Straight to jail with unsolicited advice to women givers, I say.
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That’s why Jonah Hill left Sara Brady…. to much mansplaining about surfing… he’s the best after all!
Radical solution. Start off by initiating a friendly conversation, non-patronising, platonic, encouraging. Are they getting a few? How long have they been surfing? We’re you out last week when it was x? Treat them like an equal.
Then you ask – ask, mind you – would you like a tip? At this point they will probably say yes because you’ve established yourself as a friendly human being who doesn’t look down on them. If they don’t, you probably screwed up the first part and came off as a patronising creep, so you don’t get to give them advice. Or they will refuse a tip and then feel obliged to explain why they are refusing, because that’s only fair when a friendly person offers you something worthwhile and you refuse.
Crazy, no?
I’d rather move to Thailand and sand Firewires.
I think the term they are looking for is ‘free mentoring’.
A pansexual surfboard, wtf lol ok then. In that case, a 2 plus 1 seems like the equivalent of a bisexual surfboard, and a thruster (pun) is a heterosexual surfboard with a twin (2 of same fins) being a homosexual surfboard. Although a mid seems quite gay too so my assessment could be off.
Oh! Spelling lessons too. It’s a twofer.
One of john shitstain cockinhands mates…or the only one.
Don’t get all ELO with me cunt!!
Clearly, the relations between the sexes have never been better. Same goes for race relations.
Sometimes ya just gotta stop and smell the fartblossoms
Scrunter has his preconceived notions on lock down
rico suave
Dirt bike chase through LA over, but some fun moments.
The kid filmed the entire event that went on for 30 minutes.
Used his phone to pay Apple pay….. HE STOPPED FOR GAS!!!! Looked like he could have gotten a few gallons in too…. very efficient pit stop
Then he coordinated another gas pit stop…… lost the cops going through a park and found a Crystal Geyers bottle filled with petrol… dude was coordinating his movements with his buddies for gas!
Another kid rode with him a while too and the suspect never stopped filming himself
He wrecked on a right turn, hurt himself bad, but never dropped the precious phone
His 15 minutes of fame
I meant 30 minutes…
Haha I can’t help it, I’ve never met a man who attends dance classes on a Friday evening. I’m fascinated haha
Neither has Bograil, because they must be all women
He is the first man to ever do it
One small step for Bograil, one Giant leap for single old men….
In a few months it will likely become a sausage fest once the news is out
Sounds like something a serial killer or sex pest would get up to ay. Like those fellas who turn up for a yoga class and act all surprised when they’re told it’s the all female one hahaha
Hahahahahahahahahaha!
Hahahahahahahaha fucking hell. And don’t lie Bog we all know your dance partner is some big hairy cunt covered in tats!!!
haha Sofa called you out and Bogs has provided. Now your turn.
you need to learn how to blur your face in your pics hahah
I’m not falling for that shit again, you fucked me laptop screen last time!!
Sorry man.
haha I prob still have the pic somewhere, I could email it to ya with your face fully covered, and you can decide to post if ya want.
Photoshopped with a Batman face or Joe Turpel, or anything ya want..
I bet all the other cunts here would LOVE to see it, and Bogs already threw down…
What do ya reckon Beachgritters? Make him Post IT!
Don’t be ashamed of your massive beer gut in the pic mate, it happens when you drink too much beer.
Sick wave though! You should post it as a one off. I found it and will send it to ya. Still totally anonymous.
Just put toothpaste over your face on the screen and post it and your face will be blurred out. Cheers cunt me screen is still smeared and stinks of Colgate haha
Not my fault you probably woulda failed Homeschooling like Griff and Crosby
but can surf well
If you remember I got that card out of my cereal box that told me I have an IQ of 137 so get that up ya hahaha
it fukn worked mate
I reckon I’ll just post it with a Batman mask
Nobody even knows who Batman is when he has the mask on.
Or do you want just a pair of Glasses, like Superman
Same thing
Tell me to delete if not cool, but I will wait till closer to the comp to even post it…
Who wants to see a fat beer gutz Strayn Cunt at Cloudies in a Batman mask?
I think it is time
Walk the talk…
What do ya r4eckon Cunt?
When can I release the photo with your Batman mask on…
Is it the one where I’m actually ripped back in 30s? Hide the six pack cuz I ain’t no claimer!!! Or do mean the bottom turn shot on a solid one?
Full on fat Beergut. Drunk the whole 6 pack. Permission to post it with a Batman mask?
Considering you can’t even fuckn work out your avatar
I might let ya post it down here for a halfa at a set time for Bog and Sofa to see then I want it off. Not into claiming haha
Haha, It reckon it can wait till just before the comp.
Same Wave…. Also you might need to explain what your “Steez” is to others
Sounds fuckn gross
Na don’t post I like being anon and learned my lesson. Plus it might get Bog too horny
Haha fair enough, but….
you wont be ANON when you do commentry for the next Snapper event though,
Share it one day cunt
Horny enough to attend Friday night Salsa and moving onto Tango Dances?
Talk about pig tits.
BANNED
Waiting…
And these 2 reckon Gwens a tease!
You will be waiting some time Sofa, or at least until I’m next pissed so probably tonight if Crayfish sees this haha
So it’s Food Review Time with Hippy Portnoy, everyone knows the drill
Today we are reviewing a nationwide burger stand called Shake Shack. My first look see was at La Guardia Airport two weeks ago, but as a card carrying recluse there was no way I was waiting in line for a burger.
Took the Mrs shopping yesterday and there it was, Oxnard adjacent…. might as well give it a spin.
Now, the hard part. Figuring out how people with money invested in such a terrible product to the tune of nationwide stand alone stores?
One and done, no need to return, ever, except for the hot as fuck Mexican girls manning the dining room which I will give a 8.4.
Delta Airlines is “proudly” serving Shake Shack on some of their flights. Blech.
Maybe we could work out an exchange where you post video of you at tango and SC posts a surfing clip? I lose nothing in this exchange, and we all have something to gain.
Are you a tiny dancer SS?
Blue jean baby, LA lady, seamstress for the band
Ballerina, you must have seen her
Dancing the sand
Only vicariously – my daughter was a ballet dancer.
I love the song. It was a fun addition to the movie Almost Famous.
Padang cup on – cheeky live chat?
That ain’t that swell fuckwit on the mike unfortunately
The Jed to Cali influencer transition is jarring
Yay!
Xox
who is this grom in the booth moaning about getting cold out there? fucks sake
And what a fucked Australian accent, gosh he has even travelled and it’s still fucked.
Xox
Hahahahaha
How’s the waves bruz?
Washing into the channel, couple of end bowls, might do some work.
Xox
Sounds like he’s got a dick up each nostril
And two in each bumhole!
Xox
Fun looking with only 4 guys out
Aint no Chopes or Fiji
But fun as fuck
Still no update from our dear CB and I’m starting to fear for his welfare. Please check in and let us no you’re ok mate but mainly just check in and give us all the deets haha
I’m good! I’m more than good. I’m next level good.
Not actually pressed flesh but the online exchanges have been fricken wild to this old man’s boggled brain.
First meet up tonight for ice cream in a public place to ascertain that I am not a dangerous looney.
Been reassessing my old fashioned instinct to monogamy to ensure comliance with contemporary mores.
I promise a post-comp report
She’s not Russian or Ukrainian, is she?
Ukrainian chicks dress poorly, but man…
Hahahaha coupla rungs down from kmart or the op shop
Nope, white Aussie chick.
Just be yourself and finger your bumhole, bless you dear Channelbottom !
Xox
Live chat?
holy shit hahah
Hopefully post-romp report CB.
Hahaha I fucking love it when they tell me what to do when we’re rooting. Not like that scunt haha