Deceptively fragile big-wave legend Russell Bierke and “why I love honeymoon dick!”

Meet the man who's nearly been ushered into heaven several times and he's only twenty three!

Russell Bierke, twenty-three, is the diminutive and deceptively fragile looking son of noted Californian-born shaper Kirk Bierke whose boards are sold under the label KB Surf and made in Ulladulla, three hours south of Sydney.

This four-minute short attempts, and with reasonable success I think, to document the trajectory of Russell’s surfing life.

He has nearly been ushered into heaven several times (read about the time he was “blue as a Smurf and all fours spewing” after a wipeout in Victoria) and Russell was the protagonist in the highly cited film Flow State, which was released one-and-half years ago.

Russell: A brief introduction was made by Andrew Kaineder, a filmmaker of quite some note.

 


See John John Florence apply a hitherto unseen level of mastery of Backdoor and Pipe crowd, “I want to emphasise how gnarly this clinic was, you get one crazy wave at Backdoor, you don’t get eight in a row!” says bro Nathan.

"Eight psycho waves in a row."

Nathan Florence, twenty-six or thereabouts and with reddish brown eyes like dried blood, is the most interesting of the Florence pack.

Although only worth between an estimated five thousand and thirty-two thousand dollars, somewhat short of big-brother John’s ten or so mill, he carries his YouTube vlog with a personality that is pleasingly off-centre, whimsical and cheesy like synth-laden music.

In this episode, filmed a few days ago, day two of a North Shore swell, Nathan GoPros from the water at Backdoor, Pipe, while his hired filmer points camera from beach.

You’ll want to miss the first twelve minutes of what might generously be called B-roll but do examine, first, the drainer Michael Ho threads followed by the surfing of his older brother who picked the joint apart for four hours.

Says Nathan of big bro, “I want to emphasise how gnarly this clinic was. You get one or two crazy waves at Backdoor you don’t get eight in a row. The manipulation of the crowd, navigation of the crowd, reading the ocean combined with being the best surfer in the world…eight psycho waves in one session…”


POV: See the incredible moment Pipeline heavyweights Jamie O’Brien and Mason Ho ride famous tube together; watch as JOB confronts John John Florence after unexpected drop-in!

Many narratives on display during Pipe swell… 

The ease with which Jamie O’Brien rides the Pipeline catwalk is a source, to me at least, of ongoing amazement.

It’s not unexpected, of course, he’s lived there his entire life, but for a man of almost forty years who looks like a hamburger on a griddle, an overgrown Annie doll, it does continue to delight.

In this episode of his weekly vlog, Jamie humps Pipe on one of his Catch Surf softboards, the crowd seeming to part in the refracted light of his fame.

Two men don’t, however.

There is John John Florence, whom Jamie swiftly confronts on camera. The moment is light but in the superficial jocularity there is a back-story one might call strange, and then there is Mason Ho, whom one could never be even slightly mad at.

The pair’s double tube ride is like a first kiss, tender, shock waves of pleasure, the thrill of the mind turning off, blind to any ambition other than the tactile etc.

A very good edit.


Life at the bottom: Ain’t That Swell’s Vaughan Blakey and Jed Smith redefine Burleigh Heads Single Fin Classic!

Like white linen with a fine dusting of cat hair… 

It’s important, I think, to present this comedic episode alongside the oppressive guidelines Vaughan Blakey and Jedaum Smith were forced to operate under.

The pair were told,

No shots with appearance of pain or degradation.

No facials (bodyshots are OK if shot is not nasty).

No bukakke.

No spitting or saliva mouth to mouth.

No food used as sex object.

No peeing unless in a natural setting. eg. field, roadside.

No coffins.

No blindfolds.

No wax dripping.

No two dicks in/near one mouth.

No shot of stretching pussy.

No fisting.

No squirting.

Toys are OK if shot is not nasty.

No degrading dialogue, eg, “Suck this cock, bitch” etc.

And so on.


Watch: Harry Bryant in “Drama and attitude and then the cock shot!”

A rock-and-cock movie!

If you didn’t know, Harry Bryant is a twenty-four-year-old Australian with a bushy hairdo and albino moustache that twinkle like glitter on a burlesque dancer’s corset.

This film, Bio Haz, shows little Harry flying like a hummingbird, deftly and delicately. It was shot over the course of one year as Harry travelled with girl Kayla and dog Baz along the surfable Australian coastline.

Shit got rigorous, as they say, in the north-west.

There is recklessness, too, and drama and attitude.

Like being rimmed by a trannie who might be your uncle.