John John like Rommel's juggernaut, Slater rides the bleak highway out of town…
Shrill winds buffeted the Margaret River rights today, first offshore, later crosshore, flogging the imperfect sets.
You might’ve turned your browser on early for the Slater-Andino-Pupo show this morning, not so much for the pleasure of seeing a master at work on his highly sophisticated surfboards but to see if… this is it… has the most beautiful surfer that’s ever lived suddenly become old and funky and ugly?
And so you wonder, you hope, for a little post-Easter miracle. What if Slater sucks in the south-west’s wonderful autumn air and his muscles quiver back to life?
Yeah, he was outsurfed by Brother, in round one, but you could see Slater rising on his elbows. Round two would be a jab in the arm.
Watch an abbreviated version of that round one heat here.
Y’couldn’t imagine Slater booking two lasts and a second-last from the first three events. But Italy’s Leo Fioravanti waltzed his step-daddy’s charge straight into last place.
Watch that here.
Explaining the loss(es), Kelly said, “I really can’t get in a pussy mood” or thereabouts.
John John Florence? Don’t tell me his eyes don’t bulge out monster style when he gets a little juice under his fins. He looks tranquillised on the Gold Coast, in Rio, Portugal. But WA? Big France? Tahiti? Fiji? John John Florence is a blue flame. For all the “surfing for sevens” here, John John jerks his hips for eights, nines and tens. You like this?
Do a little highlight catchup here.
Drug Aware Margaret River Pro Men’s Remaining Round 1 Results:
Heat 10: Kolohe Andino (USA) 15.70, Kelly Slater (USA) 12.16, Miguel Pupo (BRA) 5.10
Heat 11: Josh Kerr (AUS) 14.93, Wiggolly Dantas (BRA) 14.50, Jay Davis (AUS) 9.50
Heat 12: John John Florence (HAW) 18.87, Adrian Buchan (AUS) 15.27, Sebastian Zietz (HAW) 13.20
Drug Aware Margaret River Pro Men’s Round 2 Results:
Heat 1: Jeremy Flores (13.00) 14.80 def. Jay Davies (AUS) 14.60
Heat 2: Jordy Smith (ZAF) 15.94 def. Jacob Willcox (AUS) 13.73
Heat 3: Leonardo Fioravanti (ITA) 16.60 def. Kelly Slater (USA) 13.43
Heat 4: Wiggolly Dantas (BRA) 18.06 def. Jack Robinson (AUS) 14.37
Heat 5: Adrian Buchan (AUS) 18.00 def. Dusty Payne (HAW) 17.93
Heat 6: Adam Melling (AUS) 13.84 def. Conner Coffin (USA) 12.63
Heat 7: Caio Ibelli (BRA) 14.74 def. Alex Ribeiro (BRA) 12.83
Heat 8: Alejo Muniz (BRA)12.23 def. Kai Otton (AUS) 10.57
Heat 9: Matt Banting (AUS) 14.90 def. Stuart Kennedy (AUS) 13.30
Heat 10: Kanoa Igarashi (USA) 14.23 def. Ryan Callinan (AUS) 13.64
Heat 11: Miguel Pupo (BRA) 14.50 def. Davey Cathels (AUS) 13.33
Heat 12: Sebastian Zietz (HAW) 15.40 def. Keanu Asing (HAW) 13.00
Drug Aware Margaret River Pro Men’s Round 3 Match-Ups:
Heat 1: Matt Wilkinson (AUS) vs. Matt Banting (AUS)
Heat 2: Joel Parkinson (AUS) vs. Michel Bourez (PYF)
Heat 3: Julian Wilson (AUS) vs. Miguel Pupo (BRA)
Heat 4: Nat Young (USA) vs. Taj Burrow (AUS)
Heat 5: Josh Kerr (AUS) vs. Adrian Buchan (AUS)
Heat 6: Adriano de Souza (BRA) vs. Leonardo Fioravanti (ITA)
Heat 7: Gabriel Medina (BRA) vs. Adam Melling (AUS)
Heat 8: Wiggolly Dantas (BRA) vs. Kolohe Andino (USA)
Heat 9: Jordy Smith (ZAF) vs. Kanoa Igarashi (USA)
Heat 10: Jeremy Flores (FRA) vs. Sebastian Zietz (HAW)
Heat 11: John John Florence (HAW) vs. Caio Ibelli (BRA)
Heat 12: Italo Ferreira (BRA) vs. Alejo Muniz (BRA)