And other important news roiling the Hawaiian islands!
The in-laws are visiting, always a treat. Nice thing about visitors, they see where I live through fresh ideas. It is paradise, kinda. But you can’t help but take stuff for granted. Too many days I find myself driving home in a funk, cursing the universe in general, while forgetting that I live a life better than 99.9% of humanity.
An unfortunate part of visitors is that they always want to do stuff that sounds fun in theory, but sucks in reality. Which is why I’m gonna be dragging a team of non-aquatically inclined boners in kayaks up the Wailua River later today.
I don’t enjoy kayaking. I’ll use them to get somewhere, if I have to. But I don’t find any joy in the act of sitting and paddling. Hard work, too much sun. Boring. But no big deal. I can take time from my “busy” schedule. And they’ve been footing the bill for dinner lately, which I enjoy. Wife’s been pushing to try out some new fancy pants eatery down the road. Damn expensive, even by Hawaii standards.
The food was okay. Overly complicated but unadventurous. The type of place they use top quality fish but slather it in weird foamy sauces. Where the name of every dish is a paragraph. Where they feel the need to tell you exactly which farm they sourced their tomatoes from. Which I think is dumb. I don’t care where my food comes from, so long as it tastes good.
My wife drank two bottles of strong red and a couple glasses of white with dinner. Absolutely hammered. Apparently feeling a tad randy when we got home.
“Heysh bebby, less fuck!” Then passed out snoring on the couch. Very erotic.
Insisted on coming spearfishing with me the following morning. Spent the entire time retching and complaining of “seasickness.”
I’ll admit I wasn’t very polite when she wanted to head in the moment we finally reached the patch of reef we’d spent an hour swimming to.
Speaking of highfalutin Hawaiian eateries, did y’all see they shut down the BeachHouse in Haleiwa?
Place used to be Jameson’s, got bought up and remodeled. Owner, Andy Anderson, played it fast and loose, didn’t bother to get the proper permits.
Put his money into tarting the building up, saved by neglecting the septic system. Now all that shit’s spilling out onto nearby properties.
Anderson was the guy behind the proposed development of a hotel on the same property a few years back. Local residents weren’t into it. Lots of protests, got the idea shut down. Which was probably for the best, since the guy is now almost literally shitting on the local community.
In other totally unrelated Oahu news, divers found some unexploded WWII ordinance a few yards off the beach near Kaena Point. Crazy how much of the stuff is sitting near shore out here. Apparently a hell of a lot more than you’d think. A local Kauai dive spot is notorious for it. Launch was used by the military way back when. They thought it was a good idea to toss unneeded explosives over the side on the way in. Not very forward thinking.
Tyler Kahumoku caught some neat footage of them detonating the device. Definitely did some damage to the reef. But there’s not much more that could’ve been done. You’d have to be a maniac to try and dismantle a bomb that’s been resting on the ocean floor for nearly a century.
