A wonderful snowboarder tells us how we look!
(This story first appeared on LodgeGrit. Are you like Matt Biolos? Do you like snowboarding better than surfing? Then LodgeGrit is the place for you too! It’s also anti-depressive!)
People talk shit on snowboarding. It’s an unfortunate truth, but it is the truth. But why? Sure we wear silly outfits when we snowboard but, like, it’s to keep us warm and dry (for the most part, some though are just bad and deserved to get made fun of…) and sure we are attached to the board, but you know what, who cares? It’s the best.
One thing though is that if you work in snowboarding, you probably live in SoCal. And if you live in SoCal, you probably have to deal with surfers. Now snowboarding might get made fun of, but holy shit are surfers the worst.
And here’s why:
Surfers are a bunch of Christopher Columbuses!
The bastards think they’re the shit because they’re the “original” board sport*… Well you know what bleach blond bro from San Clemente?
You didn’t invent shit! You’re just a cultural appropriator!
We as snowboarders know that we didn’t invent shit. We’re just doing our thing and love it. And if you’re down you’re down.
*If you’re Hawaiian you get a pass on this one…
Surfers just wear neoprene or shorts. Running around the beach with your bros in a skin-tight suit!
Sick lol. Sure we may not wear the coolest outfits when we are snowboarding but at least we can wear it to the store to buy some beers when we are done.
Surfers are fucking assholes!
Have you ever met a group of surfers? Well, prepared to get vibed out harder than you have ever been vibed in your life. Since we, as snowboarders, have been getting ragged on for years we are a pretty nice bunch. Granted, if you’re a kook you will get vibed out. But, like, it’s easy, just don’t be a kook.
They think they can do whatever they want cause they’re surfers!
“Oooooooo I surf and know a lot about surfing so let me start a snowboard site cause if I know about surfing I must know about snowboarding oooooooooooooo…”
They’re all so tan and buff and get chicks!
Ok I guess that part is pretty cool, but seriously fuck them.
Fuck them all.
Its true, everyone should stop immediately.
Hondo – you are obviously an appropriator of Chas, and not even a good one. Please get fucked.
Just in case there was any doubt: look what those fuckers over at the Inertia have been doing! This from the Guardian:
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Motherfuckers
Personally, I’m waiting for SUPGrit.
Watching a surf clip after watching any skate clip on Thrasher’s site really puts how lame we are into perspective, especially in the music curation.
Fuck off idiot as soon as you wrote ” if you work in snowboarding, you probably live in SoCal”
Learn a bit of geography you fucking muppet – ever heard of Austria, Switzerland, France, NZ, Japan Australia even – there is people there that “work in” Snowboarding – I’m sure they don’t live in SoCal.
Let’s revise for dear Hondo: “if you work at the corporate headquarters of a major Western U.S.-based snowboarding apparel brand, you probably live between Long Beach and La Jolla, are white, had a childhood median household income of $200k+, and spend more time driving to the mountain than you do at the mountain.”
Hahaha someone’s on the blob…
Also, on the fuck SoCal note: http://yobeat.com/2010/04/1…
you were in the same room as inertia?
“People talk shit on snowboarding. It’s an unfortunate truth, but it is the truth.” Unfortunate?? Why? That was the most fortunate thing to happen to snowboarding. Gave it some street cred.
Then there’s “The bastards think they’re the shit because they’re the “original” board sport*… *If you’re Hawaiian you get a pass on this one…” A pass on the bastard part or “original” part or both??
Don’t get me started on these 1989 mag covers
More in common than you think
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I googled BitchGrit and it came up with Beach Grit – Is google ever wrong?
Surfers arm’t idiots, snowboards aren’t idiots, EVERYBODY is an idiot!!! You’re all idiots. Castrate yourself.
The inertia called – they want their article back!
The Inertia doesn’t fuck.
They make love. Sweet, sweet love.
Ain’t that the truth
And the video of a guy leaping from tall buildings..
LodgeGrit is gonna be bigger than big. But me, I’m holding out till PingpongGrit hits…
Hondo is that kid who couldn’t progess from a boogie board to surfboard so he decided to hang with the kids who accepted all retards and strap his feet to a board so he’d never fall off
also you can surf all year around vs waiting for snow
And as winters continue to warm due to anthropogenic climate change your favorite activity becomes even more esoteric. Hooray!
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What is this snowboarding you talk of?
snowboarding is super fun but you have to pay to play…everytime. so surfing wins
You guys are struggling for content.. #captainobvious
Strugglegrit.
Would you edit StruggleGrit?
It would be my honour… I’ll start assembling a crack team of the worst commentators I can muster.
*raises hand
We finally beat you guys! Long time coming!
Nah, they’ve got endless JJF World Champ content ready to upload
more Kellygrit.
We are pretty fucking lame
Fuck everyone.