Let's imagine a Slater presidency!
How much do love politics? It is the best dance! A most wonderful tableau! And who would you like to see as President of the United States?
What about Robert Kelly Slater? Yesterday, the very good Instagram account @thesurfinghobo posited the question: Right, so who would vote for this dude in less than two weeks time if they could?
“He was born in Syria!” you shout.
“Birther!” I shout back. “Our Robert was born in Cocoa Beach!”
And what would a President Slater administration look like?
Super passive aggressive! World leaders would get smiled in the face then stabbed in the back. “Just met with #angelamerkel she was almost as pretty as #queenanne but #notquite.”
Very healthy! Massive chia subsidies would allow for that magical seed to be served in inner-city lunches. Minorities would soar on vitamin rich wings!
Paranoid! There are massive conspiracies out there too vast to talk about here. Know what I mean? But yeah. President Kelly would get to the bottom-ish.
Winning! America would become Amer1ca again.
Ageless! Because of the chia subsidies!
It sure would be grand. Vote Robert K Slater as a write-in and never go hungry again! (Chia!)