Go John John go!
And did you happen to catch John John Florence’s round 4 heat vs. Adriano de Souza and Michel Bourez in the early/late hours (depending on where you live)?
Did you?
John John crushed his competition! Decapitated them and early by dragging his bulbous bottom into a tube and across ADS and Michel’s outstretched necks. Pottz declared, “He’s on fire!” with that trademark growl that has been missing as of late.
He loves John John very much as does the rest of our surfing world and hopes for a first of many grand championship.
Even Brazil stands and cheers the Blonde Ambition. “Ir Jon Jon ir!” The country shouts in unison! Vanquish us! Destroy us please!
There will be wonderful analysis from our dear Rory Parker later in the day but just watch this heat right here in full and without distraction.
History is nigh.
Go John! Please save the vicarious Anglo-Saxon ego. I pray please Semite-Jew-come-blued-eyed-WASP-Jesus-Christ reinstate the Anglo-Saxon-blonde supremacy. Thy Kingdom Come. I turned to see One like the Son of Man, dressed in a long robe, with a golden sash around His chest. The hair of His head was white like wool, as white as snow, and His eyes were like a blazing fire. His feet were like polished bronze refined in a furnace, and His voice was like the roar of many waters. Revelation 1:12
The whole surfing world except for Brazil loves JJF. The reason is because he’s the best surfer in the world and is also humble and decent. Maybe Brazil should question their anti-JJF sentiment? For a country that has experienced its fair share of oppression, I would think they would be more enlightened than to hate someone for the sole reason they are not from Brazil.
***Note: JJF being the best surfer in the world does not mean he’s the best competitive surfer in the world, so calm down. Gabby can still have that title if you want, irrespective of who wins this year.
Oh dear. The British colonialist class-system-subservience-obedience thing again about “humble & decent”. Let us bow down the Her Majesty the Queen. God save the Queen. (Btw, why does John look constipated each time he does the same passive-aggressive turns; the way he squeezes those butt cheeks together, like Steph Gilmore does? When John becomes world champ, will he do one of those G-string butt shot thingos with Malia Manual? ). At least for me, the tour is so boring without Gabriel Medina. Already I miss him. He & Felipe bring the “unpredictable untelegraphed” higher energy factor into surfing. While John is certainly elegant & a tube freak, his turns are often rather contrived.
Stop using big words in an attempt to sound smart. Your second sentence is unintelligible. As for JJF’s turns being contrived, what a load of crap. His style is so unique on tour. When he does a cutback, he often looks away from where he is turning. No one else on tour does that as the customary technique is the opposite. And the fact that you claim Felipe is unpredictable shows how overcome by bias you are. Filipe is undoubtedly one of, (if not ‘the’) most talented aerialists on tour, but he reverts back to his safety air reverses every second wave. How about you stop squeezing Brazilians into “what I like about surfers” and just support the surfers who are actually worth supporting. Gabe is a phenomenal surfer, but as a person, he is a piece of shit and a little bitch.
His style is certainly very unique & rather androgynous, having an effeminate quality about it; what I previously described as “passive-aggressive”. The safe & careful way he sets up a bottom turn before unleashing into a vicious but ‘tweeked’ turn, has a Step Gilmore quality, as I said: “effeminate passive-aggressive”. I struggle to describe my perceptions here given John’s ‘uniqueness’. As for Gabe, as I said, he is exciting & unpredictible. Gabe & Felipe light up the tour where as John occasionally does freakish tube riding. Unlike you, I focus more on the surfing style & attitude rather than the media personality. Gabriel has lit up the tour, like Andy Irons, which is why the old guard like Kelly are scared of & respect him. Gabriel epitomizes what competitive surfing is about while John is the common white person’s hero. John is not “humble”. John actually loves the adoration & lime light. John has a natural shyness, slight social retardation & at times struggle to express himself, which makes him appear “humble”. You like him because he probably doesn’t threaten you.
Ahhhh, now it makes sense – you love assholes. So I’m guessing you love Jeremy Flores, Sunny Garcia and Bruce Irons too. As for the common white person’s hero, Brazilians are the only people who bring race into surfing. Surfing should not be about where you are from, but who you are and how you surf. I continually hear Brazilians criticise JJF, Dane, Kelly, Parko, Mick etc, all because you hate anyone who beats (in competition or free-surfing) your precious countrymen. And as for being safe, you couldn’t be more of a hypocrite. Gabe won his title on the back of being safe. he didn’t take off behind the rocks at Snapper. He caught all the smaller waves at Tahiti. JJF is only just learning how to compete, so you label him safe? You’re an absolute moron.
I guess right about your British colonialist class-system-subservience-obedience belief system. I actually never did like Jeremy Flores, Sunny Garcia and Bruce Irons because they are just undisciplined bad boys. Like Andy Irons, Kelly Slater, Tom Curren, Mark Richards, in particular, Gabriel Medina has the mental attitude of a professional competitive athlete. His mind functions many times faster than the average competitive surfer. He is a star athlete and would be a star at any sport. He epitomizes the attitude that is professional surfing (where as John is a little like sleepy Dane Reynolds). OK. That’s it. I am just supporting variety & diversity. John is awesome. But when he wins the title this year, it will not be as convincing as when DOMINANT Gabriel won in 2014. That is why everyone will repeatedly say John is the best surfer in the world rather than the one that dominated the world title race.
I’ve never heard anyone suggest Gabe is not a phenomenal competitive surfer, just that he is a piece of shit of a person. I won’t claim all aussies/yanks/etc are unbiased, but generally speaking, surfers are unbiased. It is not a patriotic sport outside of Brazil. Brazilians on the other hand have to manufacture problems with all non-Brazilian surfers when they just don’t exist. Yeah, JJF is a bit sleepy as you say, but you then say you support variety? There have been many surfers with the competitiveness and competitive intelligence of Gabe, but name one world champ with the nonchalance of JJF? Dane was similar, but he sucked on tour, despite being one of the best surfers in the world. JJF is the definition of uniqueness and variety.
Gabriel is actually a great person, with a loving affectionate family. Only a piece of shit person would call Gabriel a “piece of shit person”. That is why your ‘decency’ & ‘humility’ rhetoric has zero credibility. I am Australian and I know right wing boorishness when I see it…..For example, although Gabriel was ripped-off against Julian Wilson, when Julian was struggling to re-qualify back in 2014 (whenever) and when Julian beat Gabriel at his home break in Brazil in a QS event, Gabriel said straight to the camera that: “Julian is a great surfer that I want to see on the WCT”. When Gabriel won the world title at Pipe, that was an exciting day. All of Gabriel’s decency & purity of endevour was reflected in his pure joy & thankfulness. We all celebrated with him.
hahaha, you are a delusional pice of shit, just like you boy Gabby. Of course he’s a phenomenal surfer, I just focused on the competitive aspect, because he is in my opinion the best competitive surfer, but not the best surfer outright. Still top three maybe, but not the best. As for you being Australian, nice try…. You can see your comment history by clicking on your name. And as for Australians being racists, I generally would agree with you, but when it comes to surfing, there is only one typically racist country, and that is Brazil. You little bitches have complete meltdowns every time you think one of your surfers is ripped off. How about floater-gate or when Medina beat Parko at Snapper? Sure, we complained about that for a bit, but ADS and Gabe weren’t getting death threats on social media and it there wasn’t mainstream news coverage of it. We’re enlightened enough to accept that you win some and you lose some. You just hope that it evens out.
You see, you keep focusing on Gabriel is a “phenomenal competitive surfer”. Actually, he is a a phenomenal surfer but you can’t see that. My two favourite all time surfers are two Aussies: Michael Peterson & Cheyne Horan. Both these surfers were unpredictable; they surfed using a 50:50 stance where they radically shifted their weight, stance & placement on the board between legs. Joel also does that but occasionally. They were both masters of the lightening fast snap-tube-stall. They were both the most radical, unpredictable & fastest surfers of their eras. To me, Gabriel surfs the same as them. That is why I like Gabriel; only for his surfing (and only to stir up the Anglophile bogan racists).
to me “sleepy” is more like surfing is so much a part of him that he’s just in a natural state rather than some amped up craze spot (which results in swimming back and forth and laughing and clapping at the judges for instance).
“Surfing should not be about where you are from, but who you are and how you surf.” – that nails it !! Could not have said it better.
I am sick of race or nationalistic pride – at least until the Olympics!!!
yes and the eddie was hardly “safe”.
Medina is nothing like Andy Irons. Irons had every emotion bared raw and searing. Medina is more like a machine. Have you watched John’s movie? He is raw power in much of it–you seem to be using “effiminate” and “passive aggressive” because you can’t distinguish something elegant and artful from someone who is more of a machine, without denigrating the first.
Medina is an incredible athlete but has feel of a machine or computer (until lately when some kind of strange warmth is emerging). JJF is like an organic part of the ocean that is just totally following what the best move is at any given moment. Doesn’t even realize he’s doing it half the time, is in a zone. About as uncontrived as you can get. And I agree about Filipe. He’s like a force of nature.
Bulbous bottom??? Are we talking physiology here or trying to placate the Brazo viewers to say he has a slight poo stance in the barrel??
is jealousy 🙂
If John wins the title Brazil is going to have a meltdown. WSL conspiracy passion. A missing person report will be filed for James B. Dear white baby jesus, that’d be years of entertainment
Unless this gets settled by who does the best air at 2ft Pipe
JJF could do a 20 ft air, sprout wings and soar around in circles over Pipe and there’d still be a meltdown.