Stab magazine is hiring(ish)! Do you have what it takes?
Here you are, somewhere near middle-age, driving a sensible car to your sensible job. Life is pretty ok. You get to meet the boyz at Buffalo Wild Wings when your team makes the playoffs, sometimes. You surf after work if the wind isn’t on it. Saturday night is Spaghetti Night. Usually.
All in all you can’t complain but some mornings, when brushing your teeth, looking in the mirror, you see something in your eyes. Some misty recollection of… something you can’t quite put your finger on.
Would you like to know what it is?
Your childhood dream of being a free fashion photographer for Stab Magazine is what!
Oh the life you would have lived! Just you, your camera, very attractive females and a bank account full of photo creds! You would have been unstoppable (as long as you could get wherever you were going on foot). Rich (with photo creds). A door wide open for future opportunities (non-paying). Respected (j/k).
Well guess what? Your childhood dream is knocking once again. Let’s read the job announcement from new Stab hire Jake Tellkamp’s Facebook page!
Any photographers in Byron Bay want to shoot a very attractive female for Stab Mag? Budget on this piece means that it would be for photo creds and not for pay, but could open a door for future opportunities. Serious Inquiries Only Please! Message me if you know of anyone who could pull it off, (and not be a creeper in the process). Cheers!
You’re not a creeper, just a somewhere-near-middle-aged man with a dream of taking free photos of attractive females for Stab Mag.
Don’t delay! This opportunity is going to be snatched up by one of these two if you don’t hurry!
You might be buying kid some Outerknown stuff… In the mid-2000s, I glassed plenty of double stringers, all in the 7′-10′ range. Clark Foam used to have several double-stringer blanks, at least four, if I recall. Now with carbon and different weaves of cloth, you can get the same strength with less weight, so the need for double stringers basically died with Clark Foam’s back stock. A used board hunt in Hawai’i, Lima, Spain, or NorCal can still yield a double-stringer, even if it’s as old as MC or JT.
As for my comment: Mikey doesn’t get that he doesn’t have to try to justify everything to everyone or be right all the time. From clip, kid surfs pretty good, but that doesn’t compensate for being defensive, righteous, annoying, or genuinely uninteresting. Surprised that he also says he wouldn’t go some of those waves from his HI clip now…the size and tube games get better with age.
By “attractive female in Byron Bay”, do you mean she uses patchouli as a deodorant?
In Southern California? Even if he has one, he don’t use it (or if he does, ain’t need it).
Jake spent the winter living in OB, SF. Also, Blacks 2017: https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Sigh. You just don’t get it.
This is why I despair of the surf “industry”. Jeff Hornbaker would be rolling in his grave if he were dead. He’s not dead is he? Also says a lot for Stab’s financial position. Hilariously sad.
Jesus, pray some empathy for the Milleniuals and their fate!
I get how ex-CTers can fool themselves into believing they’re still living the dream when they get a gig with the Hurley coaching crew for kooks, but it would take unimaginable levels of optimism to convince yourself that taking photos for free is a path to glory.
Stab seem to be taking advantage of people here. I’ve heard that BG writers, for example, can support a whole hive of bees on their salary.
Fake Jake The Snake Loserkamp
Speaking of Terry Richardson…when will we finally get to see the pictures of him and Anastasia Ashley?
Brilliance!
Lucky receding hairlines can find a payday these days.
Amen!
Thats right! If being a fashion photographer can’t pay the bills, you can always be a professional receding hairline.
Hey Jake, looks like Chas didn’t spot your “Chas Smith is the Regina George of surf writers” FB post… this is far too nice.
shit. jake blocked me but I’d really love to see. could you maybe repost?
Facebook comments on the STAB article “Inciting Racial Hatred – A New Low For Stab”
he blocked you? really? ]
Why?
How much time you got?
If this site wasn’t made to tell that tale, then I don’t know what is.
Millennial “turf war” please since, you know, you don’t blood feud.
as long as you don’t podcast it, as long as it takes.
Maybe one day, but I feel Jake and I have many more hills and valleys to cross before I completely throw him under the bus. You’ll be the first to know if/when it happens.
Jacked Toecramp, might I suggest Adam Herron aka A Damn Herring. The begrudgingly The Inertia lover apologist. That guy will do anything for free.
Police surveillance of Rory’s Nica trip! How’d you get hold of that footage?
Poor Telly,willingly diving into the quagmire known as the Stab. Godspeed young man
He knew what he was getting into.