Let's take a quick look back and appreciate!
I’ve had a moment now to cool down from the frenzy of the last few days. And as I sip a chilled Sauvignon Blanc from Negatron’s backyard I wonder, “Was this past week the greatest ever in BeachGrit‘s history?” If you are not feeling the same way, a recap is certain to refresh your memory. A chilled Sauvignon Blanc from Negatron’s backyard almost guaranteed to make you agree. Let us begin with the recap.
Seven(ish) days ago the world was reintroduced to Cocoa Beach’s own Sean Volland. The one-time professional surfer had called Kelly Slater out for the boards he was riding, saying they were impediments to victory. Kelly responded by calling Sean a “kook and wasted talent.” We proceeded to get acquainted Sean and it was only a preview!
Six days ago Michael Ciaramella writes his penultimate bit for BeachGrit about Kelly Slater breaking his foot at J-Bay. What a total bummer and even more a bummer in light of how absolutely divine the surf at J-Bay turned out to be. Best ever over the course of an entire event? I think, without fear of contradiction, yes.
Five days ago Steve “Longtom” Shearer adds another piece to what, in completion, became the greatest contest coverage ever. This particular segment spoke of all the 10s. There were so many 10s! That J-Bay contest made it hard to sleep, to eat but not hard to drink and Mr. Longtom captured the zeitgeist every single moment.
Four days ago the World Surf League announced a new CEO. Oh how we had kicked at the previous master. Kicked him where his balls would be every single day of the week. Did he ever respond? No. He was a giant chicken but there are bright days ahead for Sophie Goldschmidt and the WSL. I can feel it!
Three days ago Derek Rielly compared every 10 point ride at the just concluded J-Bay Open. It was analysis so good that it begged to be repeated. And it was! As Michael Ciaramella’s first piece for Stab! Nobody ever said the handsome little man didn’t appreciated good taste.
Two days ago Rory Parker swung back into our lives. The first time in well over a year! He explained the reasons he left BeachGrit, which mostly involved me being unpleasant and then Facebook messaged me, after I made his comment into a stand alone spot, to take his name off the byline. I responded by saying it would be wonderful if he invited me on his podcast so we could really air it out. He said, “Why would I do that?” I answered, “To get more listeners…” and he countered, “I’m happy with the listeners I have.” And that gave me a good belly laugh.
Yesterday we got to visit with Sean Volland once again. Remember him from seven(ish) days ago? Of course you do! Sean had been on the comment board throughout the week mostly threatening to rape Derek’s dogs and forcing his girl to watch. He went back this morning and deleted all of his comments but the responses are fun enough for a laugh. It was, anyhow, a wonderful conversation and ended with, “I don’t have voodoo dolls. I don’t stick pin in voodoo dolls. I’m not a black magic guru.”
And I literally can’t remember a better week on BeachGrit in my whole life and I’ve been here from the very beginning.
Can you?
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will someone tell me what sean volland said and deleted? i didnt see it. but great article about the weekly summary
Right on Chas being banged up on my back with a bionic hip installed was the best and only way to take this week in
And I thought Menstrual-Free Seas week was the GOAT (grittiest of all time), nay we climb yet higher, to where we daren’t imagine.
What a time to be alive!
“Three days ago Derek Rielly compared every 10 point ride at the just concluded J-Bay Open. It was analysis so good that it begged to be repeated. And it was! As Michael Ciaramella’s first piece for Stab! Nobody ever said the handsome little man didn’t appreciated good taste.”
heheheh, god I shouldn’t laugh.
But Mike, you must have seen Derek’s piece?
And I stole it from The Inertia! An unclean three-way!
Double dream hand reach around combo.
The changes on the ad banners look better!
That safety boat wave ride was one of the most breathtaking 1’Up’s I’ve ever seen! Part of me thinks he nudged his circumstances to get freedom for such a display of wave carving. Too bad MC isn’t around cause an interview with the driver and passenger(s) would be par excellence. I’m interested to find out the dimensions on that sled. Is the bottom contour a Belly – Vee – Double Concave or some magical variation? Could we reduce the proportions to an actual surfboard and see it draw a comparable line on a wave? Did the driver get the best sex ever from his wife that night because he owned that Heat?
That was by far the best thing to happen in that event. Yeah the surfing was good but, fuck, that was hardcore
This week sucked for everybody except cavvy.
While the picture of Jordy and fans and all those jazz hands really captures the raw human experience of this past week, I believe this celebratory time deserves Negatron taking a pic of you Chas with jazz hands in full effect. Come on, do it. We the people want it.
World Surf League jazz hands & claiming Coach John Jacobson
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Hahahahaha! Holy shit that was awesome!
Mother.Of.God. If I ever find my way out of a barrel again, I’m definitely going to “crank it underhand”.
Double dream hands for me! May even change my name to “Double Dream Hands”.. Serious!
If this is the kind of stuff you have at your disposal, I am going to start drinking in your yard as well!
Ahhh i miss old mr jones from skool
yeah when you recap it – WOW!!!!
Nice work, team. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
# 33 going back for a second helping. Then a third.