Five flavours, white devil, jazzberry jam, banana mania, radical red and atomic tangerine. 

Buy: Dane Reynolds-approved Nail Polish!

Former moves into male cosmetica!

One of the most interesting things about the business experiment called Former, with Dane Reynolds as its CEO, is its determination to succeed.

Dane tore up a $400,000-a-month contract, and Craig Anderson a million bucks a year, to pour themselves into Former and early signs suggest neither surfer is too proud to package or promote the range of t-shirts, pullovers, pants, beanies, trunks, towels, jackets and… nail polish.

Nail polish?

Oh yes, it’s a thing. As the New York Times breathlessly reported a few years back, nail polish for men “has had an explosive growth.”

Me, I kinda like the nail polish thing if it ain’t black.

Black reminds me of rain-soaked days in film festivals with earnest young men looking gloomy, smoking sad cigarettes and wearing hats that belong on the captains of sea-going boats. It’s an easy wear.

I figure, if you’re going to be a nail polish guy, at least throw a little sun-ripened technicolour in there and get real fruity.

The Former range includes the colours: white devil, jazzberry jam, banana mania, radical red and atomic tangerine.

The full “Premium Violence” set costs twenty American dollars plus postage.

Buy here. 

And watch the gang’s latest promo movie, Premium Violence, here.

 

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Jen See
Jen See
9 years ago

Whaattttt. No product test? Slackers 😉

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
9 years ago
Reply to  Jen See

Oh Jen, will you road-test?

Jen See
Jen See
9 years ago

Ha ha, I would totally do it. I mean, if you can get them to send me sample?

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
9 years ago

Best of luck to the 12 people who buy this product. I mean it!

Kennypowersmullet
Kennypowersmullet
9 years ago

possibly?? both mason an keoni dress like retards though so depends on the market they targeted.. if was just surf frother mong they might make a few $$
i surfed with craig about 2 weeks ago an he just seems like hes a little depressed..the pressures of being a pro surfer must be pretty full on to get paid to surf. that or the fact no one gave a shit who he is an only let him take his turn in the lineup. no royal treatment an no one was happy with his entourage of filmers an hangers on..

Kennypowersmullet
Kennypowersmullet
9 years ago

cheeseburger is a fat little fuck that likes to try intimidate people because he knows his mates will fight people for him.. fuck that japanese fucken kook. if he wasnt mates with mason no one would give a fuck about him.
masons an absolute legend though.

janeausten
janeausten
9 years ago

Is there surfing in the promo video? What if I die and the last thing I watched was Dane and Ando painting their nails? Thanks.

Badger
Badger
9 years ago

I back an accessory in a clothing line all day long. Like a Supreme sake set but this… this is just a pointless fashion statement representing no basis in anything other than a passing trend.

Why can’t surf brands create ideas with substance? I feel constantly let down by concepts which have no meaning and zero relevance in anything other than ‘now’.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
9 years ago

Could have waited a few months…

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
9 years ago

Send Macron the link! Big savings for French taxpayers.

Otto
Otto
9 years ago

From this day forward, Dane shall be known by the name Dan cause he clearly dropped e.

turts
turts
9 years ago

Why would you step away from easy money to launch yourself into almost certain failure? Seems like their inner circles must be completely full of unrealistic yes-men. Can you just imagine Danes other half;
‘Dane I’m pregnant’
‘Don’t worry darling, got some killer nail polish in the mix soon’

channelbottom
channelbottom
9 years ago
Reply to  turts

You know I reckon he’s got a few pennies stashed away somewhere from previous times of “employment.” I really wouldn’t worry your little head about him. He’ll be fine.
If he was any of the rest of us plebs I would understand your fears for family livelihood.

Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
9 years ago

Not sure that Jizzberry Jam will take off as a nail polish, or flavour.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
9 years ago

A surprisingly thrifty price point. But I do prefer black, although I’d never be caught dead at a film fest or smoking cigarettes.

J H
J H
9 years ago

Ando strikes me as the…uh…force behind this product line.

But what do I know.

Badger
Badger
9 years ago
Reply to  J H

I’d honestly prefer a $400 vase but what do I know.


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