Quiksilver finally releases a vest for the rest of
us!
When the buoys start bobbing up and down well
out at sea and purple blobs appear on screens and the grizzled men
at Starbucks speak in hushed towns about the upcoming “swell event”
whilst gripping maple pecan lattes what happens to your heart?
Does it leap within your chest and do you think, “Yes! Time to
break out the big dawg and surf ______ (fill in the blank with your
biggest local wave)!” or does it grow cold and do you feel, “I’m
going to be sick and go watch Blade Runner 2024 at _________ (fill
in the blank with your local movie theater).” instead?
Well don’t worry if you are the later because Quiksilver has
given you a spine and that spine is named The Highline Airlift
powered by Aqualung. That’s right! An inflatable vest for the rest
of us!
Before you are allowed to look you must click “I agree” after
the following bit of text:
The Quiksilver Highline Airlift vest is designed for use by
experienced adult surfers. Using it successfully requires strong
swimming skills, ocean knowledge, collaboration with other surfers
and lifeguards, and like the rest of your equipment — it must be
cared for and used correctly. Proper use of the vest requires
adherence to manufacturer’s instructions.
The Airlift vest is a safety tool, not a performance
enhancer. Do not take greater risks while using this vest.
But we all know that risk is the game when cushioned by air.
There’s no way anything can go wrong. Right? Tom Carroll uses one
Pete Mel uses one Jamie Mitchell uses one and you use one,
local hero.
Just think how fantastic you will feel on the beach in front of
6-8 foot Bolsa Chica or Grandview or El Porto or Emma Wood or Avila
Beach waxing your gun, peering out to sea with a steely look in
your eye. Poseidon’s rage bubbling like thunderclaps but let him
rage. Let all the gods rage and you leash up and paddle as the
tourists whisper, “That is the bravest man I have ever seen.”
The waves are almost touching the bottom of Huntington’s pier
or, like, maybe six or seven feet from touching the bottom of
Huntington’s pier but you are fearless. You are unbent. You are
strong. And you paddle and you surf and all of the people eating at
Ruby’s whisper, “Is that a god surfing out there?”
And if they could hear your voice shouting above the roaring din
they would hear, “Nope. It’s just me in my Quiksilver Highline
Airlift vest. Booya suckers!”
Buy here and
get ready. Winter is coming.
P.S. I am going to use my vest surfing 4-6 foot Swamis and also
in the lazy river at Legoland’s California Adventure.
P.P.S If you haven’t seen Blade Runner 2024 yet… I won’t spoil
it for you but maybe bring something else to do while it is
playing. A book or something.