Do you believe in equal rights for kooks?
During yesterday’s ruckus concerning whether or not you’d ever quit surfing, there appeared one very good point, as posited by Dee Walker.
He, maybe she, wrote:
“With a lot of these Euros and South Americans in the line up there is this perceived belief in equal entitlement and egalitarianism in the surf. Even beginners think they have equal rights to long-time locals. When this belief becomes the norm at a surf-break chaos in the surf ensures. Look at Snapper, Manly, Bondi etc. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending upon your perception, surfing works best with a hierarchy.”
Very good, yes?
It had never occurred to me that the political system in a surfer’s home country could impact so much on how he viewed a lineup. I always wondered why the travelling European surfer, and especially those devoid of skills, could, with the cleanest of conscience, drop-in on very good long-time locals and then become indignant when they were swiftly baptised.
I did write about an extraordinary experience I had with a British man seven months ago when, after dropping in, falling off and wrapping me in his 7S Super Fish, he complained that I should’ve yelled louder. And, who then paddled off, dropped anchor ten metres outside the lineup and started shaking his head at me. And then, in a very big voice, reiterated his position that it is the surfer on the inside who takes all responsibility for a collision.
What’s your take?
Do kooks have equal rights?
Is the lineup a better, safer, and more satisfying place, if we all ride together as one, and that no matter how good you get your right to a set wave is equal to that of the absolute beginner?
As well, do you believe it’s true that the political system of a surfer’s home country determines how the hierarchy of a lineup is perceived?
All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.
And that’s just a fact.
Hi Derek, thanks for picking up this topic. It is an interesting one. I will try to provide my insights on the situation. I may or may not make sense…and feel free to debunk my theory.
I think it is firstly imperative to define a kook. While subjective, I think it is universally accepted amongst any intermediate to advanced surfer that a kook can referred to as someone who may potentially inflict major annoyance, destruction and danger towards other surfers in the line up
For the purpose of this topic, egalitarianism amongst kooks, I have defined the definition of “kook” into two subsections. Due to their dangerous nature I have also likened each subsection to a specific warhead.
The first form of kook I refer to as the landmine. The landmine has very limited surfing ability. The landmine can barely paddle and will general be floundering a rip bowl section, or may present in the form of a fluorescent log on closeout reo. The landmine is generally found in surfing metropolises (Manly, Bondi, Snapper etc). Commencement of surfing by the landmine is partly influenced by main stream cultures romantic view of surfing ( Blue Crush) and through travel guidelines advising surfing as a “must do” at certain destinations (lonely planet + surf school). The exponential growth of the landmine in the metropolitan line up is attributed to the standard natural evolution of society respective of globalism, urban density, population growth and economic refuge. The landmine has very low-level surf IQ therefore telling the landmine to get out of the way generally is futile. One landmine will be replaced by another landmine. The landmine will generally dispense (or drown) in situations over 3 foot.
The second form of kook and which the theme of egalitarianism is applicable I refer to as the Scud missile. The scud will have persisted and progressed to a level where they can now adequately paddle in the line up and subsequently compete for waves. The scuds presence has increased exponentially due to the same elements as the landmine, population growth, globalism etc. However other elements need to be addressed. Post momentum generation user friendly rockers/templates/volume (thanks Mr Biolis, Webber, Cox et al) have allowed the surfer a more rapid progression in surfing ability. Surfers who would not have previously persisted riding knifeys 6’2’s can now after a few years surfing even at mid age compete for waves, sometimes with an astonishing paddle ability. This reduction of persistence to progress has turbo charged the numbers of Scuds in the lineup. However, what really distinguishes the Scud from a respectful progressing surfer, and the core to the problem is the egalitarian mindset. Derek points above address that the political system of a surfer’s home country may determine how the hierarchy of a lineup is perceived. I think this is close to the money however I think it is first prudent to review the jurisprudence of law in particular areas. I believe there are some parallels to be draw here.
Australia, the US and Hawaii (surfing super powers pre-Brazilian storm) operate under the rule of Common law. Common law is the product of the practices of a community and is based on rules of precedent. ie. when making a ruling a judge may look at prior cases and reasoning for those decisions when considering a new situation. A judge is continuously learning, reviewing and reasoning. I think the main element of common law which can be applied to surfing is that law is an artificial reason which must be learned. Applying this to the history of surfing in Australia, the US and especially Hawaii is that the code of surfing is passed down through teachings of elders and locals. As you progress you learn rules and codes, ie don’t snake, wait your turn, let locals and long-time surfers have their pick of sets, be polite, respectful, don’t rock up with 8 mates to a secret spot etc. Failure to adhere to these rules may have resulted in harsh punishment ie beatings, let down tires etc, Operation under this system in my opinion, learning rules through progression, teachings from elders and sometimes punishment allows the most orderly conduct in a line-up.
South America and Europe (bar the Commonwealth) operate under a rule of Civil law. Civil law established mainly through lil Napoleon operates more under a civil code of laws which are universally applicable for all citizens. When applying the rule of civil law to surfing, a standard code is universal to all surfers. Civil law when applied to surfing further fails pay enough respect to the importance of the progression of teaching and learning of the code of surfing. Civil law country surfers will have more of mentality that the “code of surfing” applies to all surfers equally regardless of ability and time spent learning the sport. Under civil law mentality there is a greater mindset of equal rights to waves. A hierarchical structure is not as well established under civil law to teach lesson and past history/precedents ie bailing your board and not looking behind may cause severe damage.
Apart from my rule law application theory there is also as Derek mentions the political inclination and history of individual nations to consider. However, that is its own conundrum. Anyone want to start this one off? Nationality generalisation is always an interesting topic.
I feel like when everyone in the lineup knows each other it fosters a sharing spirit. All places I have ever lived have a loyal tradition of having the pack paddle wide when a set is coming down the point, suckering all strangers out of position while the next guy in line gets his last wave in to go build said strangers new 2 million dollar beach house. Keep your rich ass stuff, I’ll enjoy my local privilege at my little slice of paradise.
The thing is, I don’t have to get gay married if I don’t want. In Noosa, kooks are forced down my proverbial throat.
Nah, these are like a vertical stand on wheels. They look stupid.
They can have equal rights. Skills >> rights. And the ocean couldn’t give a shit.
“As well, do you believe it’s true that the political system of a surfer’s home country determines how the hierarchy of a lineup is perceived?”
No, there are other vectors by which this disease is transmitted.
A worthy investigation.
Luckily my home break is one of the last regulated point breaks on the east coast. The indignant surprise when visitors making cunts of themselves get tuned up is always priceless.
What surprise methods are employed?
Nothing original.
Entertaining verbiage: “paddle past me cunt and you’ll be picking your teeth out of your throat”.
Sometimes soothing educational words “we just don’t do that around here matey, thats why he got mad at you”.
Sometimes just that wordless snap slap to the ear, which makes the head ring. I saw that one the other day when some clueless kook, with three guys out on a beautiful day, decided to stuff the only local out there on a prime set wave. Three fucking guys out and he puts his head down, claws in over the ledge and almost takes a working mans head off.
There was another set wave behind it which he could have had unmolested!
Was he a communist?
german, from maybe the old communist east, I am not sure.
Sure kooks have rights, it is just that their rights are less equal than the rights of others.
Paddle, Paddle.. Take off.. Johnny come lately & such will then know..
No. There is only ONE. And HE has built a death star.
https://vimeo.com/242235672
If you drop in on me I do my best to run into you full speed. No yelling, no warning just full speed collision. How else will you learn? Surfing is like driving. YOU are responsible when you pull out into traffic and if you think the guy already driving is responsible to honk at you so you know you’re pulling out in front of him…. well you’re going to get in a lot of wrecks, and so you should. BOOM bitch, get out the way!!!
It just seems like no other sports’ beginners are such dicks.
i think road cycling might be worse, but it’s easier to avoid interactin’
What’s worse, clueless beginners or entitled elders so out of shape they SUP now? The later is becoming prolific around here. Fat fucks who need a giant shoe horn to get in their wetsuits and try to take everything in sight before death’s rattle.
a true problem.
These guys are taking over Noosa. The lazy pricks have started cobbling together (shit)carts so they don’t have to lug or paddle to the outer points. Last week, I even saw one SUCer who was swaggering with self-entitled cool. Mind blowing.
Online shopping has removed the I’m cooler than you intimidation of the kids that work at surf shops. As well as the education they would reluctantly provide. A first line of defense is being bypassed.
This is a really solid theory, actually. But then again, I worked at surf shops all my life.
No, that’s the truest thing I’ve heard in a while. Brought me right back to my 70s gromhood. Funny, I was reliving the intimidation, the mysto, my insecurity, then I realized, Fuck, everyone must have gone thru that! Those days are long gone.
Yep never thought of that. You surf shop fuckers kept us in line.
Me too, Brothers in Arms, Thanks for fighting the good fight, I’ve discouraged hundreds from riding SUCs in the surf. I never bag on people wanting to know about learning to surf. I tell them though you can’t claim knowing how to surf after taking a few lessons. Even try to get most to learn on their own like we did. Freaking surf camps dumb it down so much.
Jesus, I was in before SUCs were a glimmer in Laird’s loin – I can’t imagine… You’re doing (did?) gods work though.
Yeah — Costco really isn’t doing a very good job telling the beginners where to surf.
yes, yes. Then if by chance they do want to attempt being legit, they now qualify themselves as experienced when they’re going an online or with puffed up chest in a shop to buy a 5’10 Hypto Shyto.
ha ha there actually aren’t a ton of hyptos around here. but the last one i saw was walking the point on a like, idk, waist-high day. it was not really a walk the point kind of day, is what i’m saying, it was a chill, swim around, ride some waves kind of day.
seems like most of the wavestormers around here quit or leave town which is alright.
While exclusionary localism (you will not surf, period) is intolerable, I’ll take hierarchical localism (there is a system
When you get a backpacker with the physique of a german gymnast calling you off a wave to poo-stance his way left on a peeling right, what sorta ‘baptism’ do you recommend?
Fire.
You should need a licence to surf Winki. That shit I’ve seen there beggars belief. There is a fuckwit there who is my nemesis and he is now rocking up to the far west coast and shadowing me at home. Always in the way and or paddling onto my waves. I’ve taken to spraying him as hard as I can and the cunt still doesn’t get it
Maybe he just really fucking likes you!
He is sent by someone who really fucking hates me.
Just because you’re paranoid, don’t mean they’re not after you – KC
Next step is to ride an old heapa and go clean over him.
Does Nick have a Kev Spacey milieu.? Like Harv WineStain was balls deep in hunger games Jenny?
Come to my hotel room with your script and I’ll answer those questions!
Come on, Dognuts! That’s way too subtle/passive-aggressive.
Have you tried drawing him a diagram?
Yeah. I draw him an arc at his stupid face.
“Spraying him as hard as I can”… um.. Sounds like a difficult can of worms to digest, are you Vorn from Staab..?
Paddle past anyone with an accent
So paddle past everyone?
Poor Tangles, alone at sea.
It’s a regional thing bleachy
yeah, i have noticed that down at the bra, we are getting alot of seppos and poms. It’s bad enough that the kids are holidays and poor bastard me has just been at work so tired as fuck. I am really surprised that these blowins havnt been bashed for some of the shit they do. It is really reaching a point where someone is going to get their head smashed out in the water and again on the beach. 🙁
Surfing is somewhat egalitarian because your terrestrial class privileges are washed from the skin of your pale buttocks as you enter the water. Then a whole new class system squashes you to the ocean floor. Which is fine. Just fine.
A learner driver is protected by the same rules relating to experienced drivers and must be afforded equal respect. But this is surfing. Fuck that shit all the way to hell and back.