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Just in: See John John nude!

Chas Smith

by Chas Smith

The world's best surfer strips!

The current best surfer in the world is John John Florence. Can we all agree? Can even Brazil agree that it would have taken a few miracles and many nods plus winks from the judges in order for Gabriel Medina to surpass him? The 25-year-old just clinched his second world title and, with nine more, will tie Kelly Slater. The world is his oyster and it appears that he has chosen to cruise it.

That’s right. John John Florence is a the face, or rather backside 360, of the Celebrity Cruise Line. The perceptive David Lee Scales from SurfSplendor noticed this video and let’s watch it together then discuss.


I was sort of expecting to discuss norovirus outbreaks or something but did you see that? John John Florence completely stripped of any and all branding? No Hurley no Pyzel no… nothing. Completely nude.


How does that make you feel? Like you shouldn’t have looked? Like weird? I will say John John strips down the branding more than any other professionally sponsored surfer. I only used Hurley and Pyzel as the examples above because those are the only brands I see on his surfboard. Does he have any others? Is it good value to professionally sponsor a surfer without receiving branding?


I suppose as the rooms in which one has made love have come to resemble one another so sex becomes currency. Ergo, it is not difficult to envision the single permissive standard as a free market for sex, a species of primitive capitalism where the entrepreneur with the most skill and enterprise and sexual funds could reap the highest profit – the adoration of countless mates and mistresses in that ubiquitous bixsexual world where men and women are as interchangeable as coin or cash.

But what do you think?