Surf style: Tom Brady wears wetsuit!

While playing in a professional football game!

It is so cold in New England that Patriots’ quarterback, and husband of Kelly Slater’s ex girlfriend, Tom Brady is wearing a wetsuit underneath his football jersey. What appears to be a generic, possibly from Costco, black rubber chest, neoprene arm’d wetsuit.

Which makes me wonder. Is this the most high profile stage the wetsuit has ever been on?

I mean, tell me of a brighter light?

Are you proud to be a surfer today?

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Resolution: Surfers go vegan!

Last decade's trend is sweeping the lineup!

We are now really on the cusp of 2018. The calendar has flipped in Australia and will flip soon in the Americas. And do you go all out with your celebration? Fireworks and booze etc. or do you stay home and watch television? Also do you make New Year’s resolutions? I don’t and can’t remember ever having had but if I was going to make one it would be to stop posting worthless pieces on BeachGrit.

It would not be to go vegan though according to PETA going vegan is trending amongst surfers. The militant pro-animal organization writes:

Surfing is about so much more than just raw talent. Learning to connect with Mother Nature—by working with the waves, not against them—is key. Being physically fit and mentally sound doesn’t hurt, either. That’s why it’s no surprise that so many surfing greats are opting to go vegan. Take a look at the lineup below, and find out how you, too, can ride the compassionate wave.

Which surfers are riding the compassionate wave?

Kelly Slater: In the video, the 11-time world champion revealed, “I haven’t had milk for probably 20 years now.” Those who follow him on Twitter and Instagram know that he has long been opposed to consuming milk, cheese, and other animal-derived “products.

John John: “I’ve become increasingly aware of food and its effects on the human body. All signs point to the idea that a plant-based diet is far superior to that of high animal-product intake.”

Alana Blanchard: “One of the reasons I am vegan is because I love animals so much and could never even imagine hurting one.”

Rob Machado: “I was raised a vegetarian so I was always aware of [environmental] issues. There wasn’t a whole lot of vegetarians around in the 80s—so we were ahead of the curve in that way.”

Jack Freestone: “Veggies.”

And other surfers I’ve never heard of.

So?

You in?

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Kelly-Slater-Rythmmia
Was Kelly handed the keys to the universe via the magic of Ayahuasca?

Did Slater find God via a Psychedelic?

Was the universe revealed via the world's loveliest psychedelic, Ayahuasca?

One month ago, Kelly Slater revealed his date with the profound via a testimonial on Facebook and which we reported here. 

Kelly was a guest of the Rythmia resort, “the ultimate spiritual vacation located in Costa Rica, in an all-inclusive luxury resort” where “93.26% of our guests report a life-changing miracle during their stay.”

“I got a miracle of information,” reported Kelly. “It opened up some sort of doorway in my future. It was otherworldly.”

Among the usual eco-resort activities, yoga, massage, hose-in-the-ass-enemas (hydrocolonic cleanses), Rythmia offers Ayahuasca ceremonies.

Now, a few of you in the comments picked it up, but being a psychedelics novice (fiddling with the chemistry of my brain scares the daylights out of me) I totally missed it.

Ayahuasca, as my research later revealed, might be the loveliest drug in the world. A ghastly tasting brew but potentially a gateway to the deepest spiritual enlightenment.

Now, let’s be frank.

Do you think it was the colonics, the yoga, the massage, the metaphysics classes, the farm-to-table organic food, the transformative breathing exercises or the Ayahuasca – famous for revealing spiritual secrets to its users – that opened the doorway to the cosmos for Kelly?

In this podcast (click here), listen to an interview with Dr Jeff McNairy, Rythmia’s head doctor as he takes you through the whole Ayahuasca game.

And click here for a blow-by-blow account of Ayahuasca ceremonies at Rythmia. Actual time travel and so on.

Here, relive Kelly’s testimonial for Rythmia.

Have you drunk the brew?

Did you travel back, or forward, in time?

Did God reach out to you?

Is the cosmos one fantastic aphrodisiacal frenzy?

Please say yes!

(Note: It ain’t completely clear, but framed off the World Anti-Doping Agency’s guidelines, it can be presume d thatAyahuasca is on the WSL’s banned substance list.)

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Dear Friends: Thanks for 2017!

We've reached the end (of the year)!

2017 is basically all over and it appears that many people are happy to see it go but not me and all thanks to you. Every day you put a smile on my face. Every day you made me chuckle with your delicate balance of wit, good-nature and cynicism. Every single day of this past year. I’m not nostalgic, due partially to a very bad memory, but I feel I will look back on 2017 with much fondness. Do you have a favorite moment?

Mine might have been the man who “baptized the savage” Gabriel Medina. Do you remember him?

https://www.instagram.com/p/BY6ibttA1mH/?hl=en&taken-by=themadhueys

Or maybe Sabre Norris’ profile on Derek Rielly.

Now that I think about it, though, yesterday’s evisceration of first-world surfboards  was all-time.

Oh I’m not about to make this a listlicle but……

I’m tired.

And a little boozy.

Soooooooo…

I love you.

 

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Just in: See John John nude!

The world's best surfer strips!

The current best surfer in the world is John John Florence. Can we all agree? Can even Brazil agree that it would have taken a few miracles and many nods plus winks from the judges in order for Gabriel Medina to surpass him? The 25-year-old just clinched his second world title and, with nine more, will tie Kelly Slater. The world is his oyster and it appears that he has chosen to cruise it.

That’s right. John John Florence is a the face, or rather backside 360, of the Celebrity Cruise Line. The perceptive David Lee Scales from SurfSplendor noticed this video and let’s watch it together then discuss.

Whoa.

I was sort of expecting to discuss norovirus outbreaks or something but did you see that? John John Florence completely stripped of any and all branding? No Hurley no Pyzel no… nothing. Completely nude.

Whoa.

How does that make you feel? Like you shouldn’t have looked? Like weird? I will say John John strips down the branding more than any other professionally sponsored surfer. I only used Hurley and Pyzel as the examples above because those are the only brands I see on his surfboard. Does he have any others? Is it good value to professionally sponsor a surfer without receiving branding?

Hmmm.

I suppose as the rooms in which one has made love have come to resemble one another so sex becomes currency. Ergo, it is not difficult to envision the single permissive standard as a free market for sex, a species of primitive capitalism where the entrepreneur with the most skill and enterprise and sexual funds could reap the highest profit – the adoration of countless mates and mistresses in that ubiquitous bixsexual world where men and women are as interchangeable as coin or cash.

But what do you think?

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