Michael Rodrigues
Brazilian footpath warrior Michael Rodrigues heads to secret meet with Hawaiians. | Photo: Steve Sherman/@tsherms

Revealed for first time: Michael Rodrigues and Tanner Hendrickson’s secret post-fight meeting!

"Let's fucking fix this now!"

It’s been one week since the Tanner Hendrickson vs Michael Rodrigues fight card and, boy, has there been a torrent of water under the bridge since: Parko retired, Kelly mounted his surfboard mid-tube, maybe best Pipe Masters ever, happy Brazilian as two-time world champ.

But, while all that was bubbling, Michael Rodrigues, the leash-yanking Brazilian WCT rookie and the Maui surfer Tanner Hendrickson, who engaged in a wrestle that ended in Tanner being banned from the Pipe Trials, were summed to what you might call a frontier justice meeting. Heading the extraordinary meet was Kimo Leong, Makaha Beach Boy and the founder of Kanaka Security Solutions, the muscle that handles security for the North Shore during the Triple Crown of Surfing.

Here’s how Steve Sherman, the photographer who snatched this moment, calls it: “I was walking down the Pipe path and I see M-Rod walking with a bunch of Brazilian heavies and we talk for a second. Kimo (Leong) and the boys from security, the Hawaiians, have pulled him and Tanner Hendrickson into a meeting, saying, ‘Let’s fix this fucking thing now.’ They flew Tanner over from Maui and had this meeting on the DL. And I was there to catch the moment, which was like Rabbit in Bustin’ Down the Door being summoned by Eddie Aikau to a meeting. When I got that photo I held onto it for a little bit. I didn’t put it on Instagram or broadcast it. But we can tell the story now.”

Sherm had his own moment with Kimo and the boys five years ago.

“They roughed me up on the beach a little bit. I was following Kelly out of the water and they were telling me to stand back and then they grabbed my backpack from behind and launched me twelve feet into the air. I looked at ’em and said, ‘Is that it?’ They loved that. And from that point on, they’ve taken care of me. It’s the same with all the Hawaiians. If you don’t hassle, if you show respect, you’re cool.”

As for Tanner and Rodrigues, Sherm says he spoke to both of ’em after.

“It all worked out. They shook hands, they compromised. Which is great because they both fucking hated each other. I was at the US Open when Tanner got hassled in the water by M-Rod, grabbing his leash, treating him like shit, and he came out of the water freaking out. But in this instance, they were both cool, ultimately. They were men about it.”

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Opinion: The World Surf League must do away with arbitrary and racist “injury wildcard!”

Introducing Sophie's Choice!

Would you like to know something that drives me really crazy? I will tell you. It drives me really crazy when organizations, companies, leagues draw up arbitrary rules then become bound by them like God himself dictated the terms.

Like, did you know Amazon workers are forbidden to drink anything other than water while working? No coffee, tea, boba tea, anything but water. Employees are fired over the offense. The middle-managers shrugging their shoulders and telling heartbroken ex-Amazonians, “Nothing I can do, man. My hands are tied.”

Also like the World Surf League’s injury wildcard rule and let us read commissioner Kieren Perrow.

We truly appreciate and understand the value of being on tour and take this process very seriously. As it has for years, this process includes an independent medical review board, which assesses the applicants based on severity of injury and the impact it has on the surfer’s ability to compete at the Championship Tour level. In the case of 2018, all three applicants were deemed to have severe injuries that prevented them from competing in multiple events. From there, we apply our technical criteria and career achievement factors – which include World Titles, career results, prior year ranking, and ranking at time of injury. While all three have strong cases, we have determined that Kelly Slater (USA) and John John Florence (HAW) will receive the WSL wildcards for 2019 and Caio Ibelli (BRA) will be the first replacement for the tour – not something we guarantee to a third applicant most seasons but is deserving in this case.

Bullshit, all of it. Kelly and John John were both selectively surfing over the course of the year and while I don’t doubt their injuries, the severity of them compared to Caio’s is… chuckle-able at best.

Now, I’m not saying that Caio Ibelli should be let in over Kelly, who did more selective surfing than John John.

No.

I’m saying that the World Surf League should simply do away with the “injury wildcards” altogether and call the two available spots, “Sophie’s Choice” (after World Surf League CEO Sophie Goldschmidt not the early 1980s tear-jerker). Of course the WSL wants eyeballs. Of course Kelly and John John bring more eyeballs than Caio. Wrapping the decision in arbitrary “injury” gauze is a silly affectation since the League made the rule in the first place and could very easily change it and should change it for next year.

It’s probably also racist.

Once it becomes Sophie’s Choice then Dane Reynolds can also come back on tour.

And Bruce Irons.

And The White Fijian.

Etc.

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Domination: Julian Wilson was the only non-Brazilian to win an event in 2018!

It's raining Brazilian men, hallelujah!

Is your heart still pounding in your chest as a result of Monday’s historic day of professional surfing? Mine isn’t, thankfully, which means I’m back to my cool, calm, analytical self. I truly believe, like Socrates, that the rational mind is superior to random fits of passion. That man is greater than the animals because of his judiciousness but I must admit to being very… concupiscent on Monday, thinking that Australia’s own Julian Wilson had a shot at winning his first world title all the way to the quarterfinals.

Silly, true, especially when viewed with the white hot clarity of hindsight. Gabriel Medina was unbeatable that day.

Neither Julian Wilson, nor any other surfer on tour, had a prayer.

Medina’s dominance was simply reflective of Brazil’s dominance all season long. Now that I have my faculties about me once again I was able to go back and closely analyze every contest.

Brazil won them all, except for the ones Julian Wilson won (Snapper, France). The “storm,” as it were, has arrived.

Now, some questions.

Will the World Surf League be able to maintain its surge of popularity amongst the adult learner market if Brazilians win every single contest next year? Oh, I don’t think adult learners are more racist than you or me, but I do wonder if Wagner Lima’s Yelp reviews might act like a drag on the entire nation. There were many harsh words there. Many angry words about etiquette etc.

Also, what do you think Jordy got for his year of end bonus?

This question haunts me more than others.

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Update: Kelly Slater and John John Florence get WSL Injury wildcards for 2019; Caio Ibelli feeling sad!

"I disagree with the decision, Kelly used and abused. Is it fair?" asks Caio Ibelli.

Well, that ain’t a surprise. Despite everything, Kelly’s busted foot that functioned at favourable events, John John’s theatrical exit mid-year and gadflies that insisted Caio Ibelli take at least one of the wildcards, the two world champions have been awarded the WSL’s injury wildcards.

Here’s the presser:

“It’s always a challenge when we have a large number of applicants for a limited number of wildcard positions,” Kieren Perrow, WSL Commissioner, said.

“We truly appreciate and understand the value of being on tour and take this process very seriously. As it has for years, this process includes an independent medical review board, which assesses the applicants based on severity of injury and the impact it has on the surfer’s ability to compete at the Championship Tour level. In the case of 2018, all three applicants were deemed to have severe injuries that prevented them from competing in multiple events. From there, we apply our technical criteria and career achievement factors – which include World Titles, career results, prior year ranking, and ranking at time of injury. While all three have strong cases, we have determined that Kelly Slater (USA) and John John Florence (HAW) will receive the WSL wildcards for 2019 and Caio Ibelli (BRA) will be the first replacement for the tour – not something we guarantee to a third applicant most seasons but is deserving in this case.”

Here’s Kelly, two days ago.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BreK7gcA_0B/

And, John John on Sunday at D-Bah.

A Solomon-esque decision and I doubt Caio is anything but thrilled with his place very close to the grid.

Midday update. As the writer Longtom has since pointed out, Caio is very said, as evidenced by an Instagram post that reads, after going through the Google Translate wringer,

INJURY WILCARD UPDATE:
Today @wsl announced that next year’s Injury Wildcard will be Kelly Slater and JJ Florence. Sincerely, I disagree with the decision, Kelly used and abused. She went to Fiji 20 feet during the Keramas event, stayed 3rd in the pool and did not go to France next week. This is the second consecutive year that he uses the same wave. Is it fair?

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bri_cDkAMn2/

The two other replacement surfers on the men’s side are Portugal’s Fred Morais and the Australian Bruce Irons-alike Ethan Ewing.

The defending women’s world champ, Tyler Wright, who disappeared from the tour mid-year in a still-to-be satisfactorily explained manner, is the women’s wildcard. The replacement surfers are the Australian Keely Andrew and Santa Babs’ Sage Erickson.

Oh and more from the presser, which I’ve thoughtfully cut and pasted here.

The 2019 WSL CT will be the primary Tokyo 2020 Olympics qualification avenue for the world’s best surfers. The world rankings at the end of the 2019 CT season will determine 18 of the 40 places at the Olympic Games (10 men and 8 women). The remaining 22 places will be determined at the 2019 and 2020 ISA World Surfing Games, the 2019 Pan American Games in Lima, and a single slot (each for men and women) for the host nation, Japan.

Of these 18 places determined by the WSL, there is a maximum of 2 men and 2 women for each country (e.g. if there are 3 women from Australia in the Top 8, only the Top 2 female Australians will qualify). 

The 2019 Championship Tour starts in April and runs until December. This is a year-long, multi-stage tour that tests the world’s best surfers in a variety of different waves and conditions. The CT schedules are listed below:

2019 Men’s Championship Tour schedule
Gold Coast Men’s Pro: April 3 – 13, 2019
Rip Curl Pro Bells Beach: April 17 – 27, 2019
Bali Men’s Pro: May 13 – 24, 2019
Margaret River Pro: May 27 – June 7, 2019
Oi Rio Pro: June 20 – 28, 2019
J-Bay Open: July 9 – 22, 2019
Tahiti Pro Teahupo’o: August 21 – September 1, 2019
Surf Ranch Pro: September 19 – 22, 2019
Quiksilver Pro France: October 3 – 13, 2019
Meo Pro Peniche: October 16 – 28, 2019
Billabong Pipe Masters: December 8 – 20, 2019

2019 Women’s Championship Tour Schedule
Gold Coast Women’s Pro: April 3 – 13, 2019
Rip Curl Pro Bells Beach: April 17 – 27, 2019
Bali Women’s Pro: May 13 – 24, 2019
Margaret River Pro: May 27 – June 7, 2019
Oi Rio Pro: June 20 – 28, 2019
J-Bay Open: July 9 – 22, 2019
Surf Ranch Pro: September 19 – 22, 2019
Roxy Pro France: October 3 – 13, 2019
Meo Pro Peniche: October 16 – 28, 2019
Hawaii Women’s Pro: November 25 – December 7, 2019

 

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From the own-goal Dept: The World Surf League’s bizarre Mavericks PR debacle!

International media swoons while the World Surf League stays invisible!

The sun should be shining very brightly this morning in Santa Monica, home of The World Surf League. The best day of professional surfing history just wrapped in epic conditions. The new champion, Gabriel Medina, is talented, handsome and theoretically marketable. He didn’t win by just hanging on. He won by destroying the competition. By sending a grown man with interesting nipples straight over the falls.

But another narrative is being squeezed through the lamestream media. The story of Mavericks, what an epic day it was and how there was no competition. Shall we read some headlines?

Surfers brave monster Mavericks waves, despite no competition (ABC 7 local news)

Despite Mavericks delay, surfers still ride 5-story ‘raw and rugged’ waves (SF Gate)

Massive waves arrive but a Mavericks contest is a no-go (The Mercury News)

Despite really big waves, no Mavericks surf contest this week (San Luis Obispo News)

Etc.

Surfline’s Marcus Sanders had the day’s best wrap (read here!). He was there, trying to corral surfers for interviews etc. and had a first-person view on the day. Let’s read a smidge?

And the spectral buoy readings would’ve never said in a million years that Lenny was one of the first to paddle and shred at 10am, or that he was joined by a crew of other young Hawaiians, including Nathan Florence, Billy Kemper, Koa Rothman, Danny Fuller and Torrey Meister, who were in the lineup from dawn to dusk, bobbing around on a little boat in between making giant drops and/or taking serious beatings alongside a solid-and-growing local crew.

Oh it was wild, and maybe the World Surf League was correct in not running but when some of the world’s best big wave surfers are out putting on a show and the world’s media is starving to witness the “biggest swell event in 10 years” doesn’t it beg for… an real, honest explanation?  Maybe their model was right but… don’t you think the governing body of professional surfing would have tried to get ahead of the story a bit?

Or market it as an “expression session?”

Or have a make-shift contest where people vote at home for who went the biggest?

Or anything other than looking like Chickens of the Sea?

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