Dream Job: Become a professional indoor surfer today!

"As a professional sport, indoor surfing isn't particularly lucrative..."

I am in the great state of Florida just a handful of miles away from the Orange County Convention Center, very excited to collect my lanyard and get Surf Expo-ing. Many wonderful things to see and do, probably too many which worries me. I don’t do well at buffets. I always stack my plate to the sky with everything I love all at once. Biscuits and gravy, blueberry pancakes, coq a vin, gratin dauphinois, flæskesteg, chicken parm, a few meat pies and a giant piece of rhubarb pie. It never works out and I fear I’ll stack my metaphorical Surf Expo plate in the same manner, giving myself a terrible stomachache of the soul.

Thankfully, Matt Warshaw, surfing’s preeminent surf historian, and David Lee Scales, podcast impresario, are with me and I will lean on their advice. Where should I go? What should I do? Should I try that stand-up paddle rowing machine? What about that new and improved Flowrider?

I try to give David Lee lots of advice when we’re together and it throws Matt into fits of despair because he thinks it’s bad advice. Last night David Lee said, “I don’t have an addictive personality.” I told him that he has to smoke 10 cigarettes a day for 10 days to really find out. Matt Warshaw sighed deeply. I also told David Lee he has to get married quickly without thinking about it to a woman with good genes, either like a super scientists or pro athlete or something because he’s not getting any younger and should have some children. Matt shot me a dirty look and said, “Do not listen to him David Lee.”

Speaking of Flowrider, I read just this morning, on the Vermont Public Radio website that a person can become a professional indoor surfer and let’s peruse together quickly:

Vermont is not known for its great surfing. But the second-ranked pro indoor surfer in the world lives in landbound—and snowbound—Jay, and she’s not even out of high school yet. She’s 16-year-old Monica Caffery.

You can catch her riding the waves on the Flow Rider in the dead of winter every weekend at the Pump House indoor water park at Jay Peak Resort.

Monica says she got interested in the sport when the Pump House first opened and lifeguards were being trained on the Flow Rider.

“We had all the pros from all around the world and country come to teach the lifeguards and they talked to my cousin and said, ‘Why don’t you come down to Florida and Alabama to ride with us and compete?’ And my uncle invited my dad and I to go with them,” she said.

As a professional sport, indoor surfing isn’t particularly lucrative. At the nationals, Monica says she won $250 and got $500 for finishing second at the Worlds at Punta Cana, Dominican Republic. To fund her travel costs for competitions, Caffery designs, silk screens and sells her own Flow Dog hats and tee shirts.

Today I’m going to convince David Lee to become a professional indoor surfer but I’ll have to tie Matt up and toss him in a closet first.