Translating Portuguese into English yields surprising results…
If you’re good at time zones, and you like to soak in world qualifying series events, you might’ve examined the Oi Hang Loose contest in Brazil these past few days, nights.
Big names in there: Gabriel Medina, Italo Ferreira, Mason Ho and so on, with an able supporting cast, and all of ’em putting it on in the wedges of Fernando de Noronha.
Here’s a taste.
Throw on the English sub-titles over the Portuguese commentary, howevs, and that’s where the laughs start.
BeachGrit reader and super surf coach, Ben Silk, was one step ahead of your old pal DR the other night when he screen grabbed the better comedic moments.
Does anyone speak Portuguese?
If so, do you think these translations are accurate? Are they wonderful Brazilian idioms, perhaps?
Or has artificial intelligence still got a little way to go?
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I’ve got some photos of me shaving my armpits and chest if that works?
Very mature answer…
Apols.
Love that vid.
Oh! Yes it did escape me. Well played!
Did you like my mock-patronising tone?
I worked hard on that.
‘Sans’ dear.
I wouldn’t want to be blasphemous by associating sexual organs with a beloved jolly mythological entity.
TL:DR. Santa Penis Beach.
Please grow up–just a little…….
That’s the auto subtitle feature from YouTube. I was watching and makes no sense with what the commentators are saying
maybe Coco should stick to acting, might end up a real princess
Breaking news from Sans Penis Beach, California:
A video showing an incredible athletic performance by an unknown rider has created waves in the surfing community 540 degrees around the world.
The 15 minute video shows only part of what was reputed to be a 45 minute long display of ‘claiming’ up and down the beach after a small ‘cover-up’ failed to dislodge the rider from his spongey foam long board in a crowded session at the popular beach.
The short film depicts a complicated series of arm waving, jumping, marching, handsprings, booty-shaking, a rendition of the national anthem of Lithuania, pretend gun-firing of various calibres, imaginary baton-twirling, frantic sand castle building, simulated copulation with a beach umbrella, a series of dance moves including The Chicken, the Watusi, the Mashed Potato, the Swim, Walking Like an Egyptian, a Gangnam-influenced horse-riding motion, and several rounds of vigorous hand shaking with assorted awed sunbathers.
The video was filmed by a well known local ex-semi-pro surfer and released anonymously via his locally popular Instagrunt account.
Soon after the clip was released, several Surf Industry conglomerates were quick to announce potential sponsorship deals for the athlete should he make himself known to relevant authorities.
When asked about the relative importance of the achievement to the sport, Bolivar McCuntybaws, Associate Head Deputy of QuipRongTwirl’s Media Relationship Management Synergy Leverage Team said “Momentous! I cannot stress enough how relatively important this achievement is to the sport.”
About the sponsors lining up to gain traction with the athlete’s social media followers he said; “It is incredibly important that we nurture the upcoming grass-roots talent that this rider represents, and FlipTwatLong would be honoured to have him in the team.” The company had apparently changed names 3 times during the interview.
After speaking of the claim, which he said was “worthy of a championship title” he was queried about the surfing manoeuvre which inspired the extraordinary display. Mr McCuntyBaws looked confused and ended the interview by slowly rolling away, awkwardly propelling the latest in his company’s line of Stand Up Paddle Hoverboards, before catching a wheel and tumbling out of sight down a flight of stairs.
i really don’t want to but my chest is rising up and down and weird noises are coming out of my mouth like hehe haha I keep trying to resist but I read this again and the same thing happened but worse.
Well te karere is the Maori news channel in NZ I’m unsure if they control extra beer though?… maybe.
Bring a crate ‘bro
Jebus in a Noah, can you imagine if the Hawaiian lot carried on like that every time they got deep?
The NS amateur dramatics society would be bursting at the seams with scenery-chewing drama queens when there was no surf.
Do you know how many waves do that in Brasil?
He wasn’t claiming, he was in shock.
Looked a lot like a massive public wank-a-doodle to me.
Yeah probly
Hey Derek and Chas, guess Sam George nailed it, the Internet has turned everybody into a bunch of Zombies–content with posts like this–“Translating Portuguese into English” and “Child without brain learns to surf”. You guys need to raise the bar a little……..please try and post something a little intelligent–instead of mindless ‘filler articles’………
It’s the off season bro!
I’ll send you my bank details and when that’s sorted I can send you a few articles about some really uplifting tales of past surf trips.
You’ll like the one where we were heading to Bell’s ended up in Sorrento, on new years eve, got in a blue, met some chicks then stayed with em in Sunshine West until they threatened to call the cops to get us out.
You should check out http://www.theinertia.com. Might be more up your alley.
The Inertia?— where the blind lead the blind?
I have a counter-request for BG:
Please lower the bar a lot and try even harder to not post anything that is even remotely intelligent. I don’t have enough mindless filler articles in my life.
Think you just proved my point…
what point?
I think you just proved my point again
kirra?
Hear Hear old chap!……..(I had to use https://www.grammarly.com/b… just to get that right…so theres ya go mattster…smurts!!!
Are you saying the ‘child without a brain learns to surf’ article was a ‘mindless filler article’?
Really?
Yes, the irony of that answer actually dawned on me later…
They’ve got a wicked sense of humour.
Eg
When GMed says to Rosie ‘can I say smthn in portuguese? .
He says ,’ I can see her nipples and they are hard as!
Brilliant!
Puerile and pathetic – up ^.
No shit
Even his mum was laughing and she’s real concerned about the afterlife too!
I’d give you an up ^ for that snark.
But I can’t – I’m sure you understand.
I’m a Brazo, the translation checks out.
Lucky you were here
I don’t quite understand how they managed to get te reo Māori in there… ‘the message control extra beer’ — sounds like an ill thought out public health message.
So when the brazzos say “thank you god” in Chinese they are really saying “don’t let my family be killed by drug violence”
Mais o menos
What you mean people listen to Surfing?…my sound volume is always off.
Sorry Pottz, Mel and you soundless anchors.
Is “anchors” rhyming slang?
Oh and that barrel claim was fucking next level epic