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Photos: Hole dug for “safe, convenient, accessible, welcoming” Melbourne wavepool!

The rise of the Sea Machines continues… 

Do you remember the promise made, four years ago, by the investment banker and self-described”hard-core surfer” Andrew Ross, that within a decade Australia would have ten Wavegardens?

And that he, or at least his company, formerly Wave Park Group now URBNSURF, would be at the helm of every single pool?

That bullish promise inched a little closer to fruition today when the company released photos of the Wavegarden it’s building at Melbourne’s Tullamarine airport; a wave the company promises to be “safe, convenient and accessible” and created in a “welcoming environment.”

Are you listening Vulnerable Adult Learners (aka Vals)?

The presser:

Major earthworks, civil construction and services installation are now largely complete, and the heart of our 2-hectare surfing lagoon, our next-generation wave generator, has been installed.

We’re now on the final countdown to filling the world’s first full-scale Wavegarden Cove, and for first waves to be breaking around Easter 2019.

Once first waves have been produced, over Winter we’ll be fine-tuning our wave generator, developing a range of new waves, trialling custom surf hardware, and testing and commissioning our lagoon, ahead of URBNSURF Melbourne’s public opening in Spring 2019.

Read more about it, and give ’em your details if you want to surf it, here. 
Andrew ross has a 10-year-plan to fill the vast continent with man-made waves. Here's the hole for number one.
Andrew Ross Has A 10-Year-Plan To Fill Australia With Man-Made Waves. Here&Rsquo;S The Hole For Number One

The Wave Generator. Foil Free!

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Living in a tent

Swimming pools are basically huge blue toilet bowls. We’ve all peed in them — be honest — and a new study is stirring up our guilt by showing that urinating in a chlorinated pool creates a toxic chemical called cyanogen chloride. Cyanogen chloride forms when chlorine from the pool reacts with nitrogen in urine. It acts like tear gas, roughing up the eyes, nose and lungs, and it’s classified as an agent of chemical warfare.

Predictably, the study quickly resulted in headlines like “Why peeing in the pool is chemical warfare.”

But in the grand scheme of bad things that can happen to you in a swimming pool, how bad is this? Do you really need to worry about dangerous urine-induced chemicals when you take that next dive?

In the new study, researchers mixed uric acid (found in urine) with chlorine in the laboratory. In their worst-case-scenario cocktail of substances mimicking both urine and sweat mixed with high levels of chlorine, the researchers found about 30 micrograms per liter (or parts per billion) of cyanogen chloride. That’s still well below the World Health Organization guideline of 70 parts per billion as a maximum cyanogen concentration in drinking water.

Again, that was a maximum in the lab, not in real swimming pool water. In an interesting thought experiment, Casey Johnston at Ars Technica calculated how much pee it might take for an Olympic-sized pool to produce cyanogen chloride at a level that would quickly cause “coma, convulsions and death”: 2,500 parts per billion. Her answer:

“In the end, we need a pool that is two parts water to one part chlorine and would probably burn the eyeballs out of your sockets and make your skin peel away from your bones.… If you and three million other people could get at this pool and unload your pee into it before your bodies melted, before the crowd crushed you to death, and before you drowned from the massive tidal wave of pee … yes, you could feasibly die of cyanogen chloride poisoning.”

channelbottom

Good job on that!

Rick_Deadman

Dez choc nosing Andrew on the lipped podcast was the highlight of my mundane fucking week

Party Pete

Welcome to Melbourne

Phat-wan kerr

nytngnfrlgs

The Bitchy Crab

God, I love ol Robbie Smithson. https://www.youtube.com/wat…

Otto

U R B N Ruff

Superworm

Looks like a long paddle. Which outspoken bloated industry “personality” will they put out to pasture on a ski? Someone who loves talking down to people…

Phat-wan kerr

sick cunt sniffs dog orifice? dog orifice is possibly dingo.

Gino

Will be clogged with clueless new residents. They have the money and the time.
No thanks.
I’ll take my kids to the beach. You have to know what the fuck you are doing, and have common sense to do well there.

James Bickerton

Can I buy a vowel ?

The Bitchy Crab

Careful which one you buy.

https://www.youtube.com/wat…

James Bickerton

Ok you can call me Fig Jam but not F.g Jim

James Bickerton

Please invite Felipe ! Just for the headline ;
HOLY TOLEDO SURFS BATMAN CITY !

The Bitchy Crab

And the Wavegarden out the back of Hossegor is digging too, yes?

James Bickerton

I have heard no news since their press release in August last year . Brutus will know .

The Bitchy Crab

Et toi Brutus? Tu est ou?

Brutus

in the USA , just got back from a heart breaking trip from Morocco , probably need to talk to Chas about becoming a Cocaine free alchoholic , and yes the wavegarden is real , even propostioned me for boards , hopefully all the fucken adult learners will use the urban pool and become urban poolies ,

there is NO wavegarden being made near Hossegor , just a lot of hype to try and maybe get funds….dead and Le Buried!

Chief Hot stuff

Fuk the pools
Give us some Mexican deets please
I mean morrocan

Superworm

Hey Derek, which way are the photos oriented? Is the pool still offshore on a NNW like the plan?

The Bitchy Crab

Oh, that’s a very good question. I’ll ask. Wait. No I won’t. Andrew won’t take my calls. Still v upset about story four years ago.

Superworm

At least you take my comments! 😉
I think it’s offshore in a North wind…
Which by my generous guessing is about 20% of the time in Vic.
This would also have it compete with almost every surf break in Vic.
Why not orient it to be offshore in a South wind? (Se-Sw) Make it the only place to surf?

Scott

Looks like offshore is NNW to NE

Superworm

Maybe it’s a plan to reduce crowds at bells?

Lemoore Surfing Club

That holes got potential!

James Bickerton

I hope someone is going to lay down some real big turns because it looks like the world’s biggest set of windscreen wipers from the aerial view ?

Phat-wan kerr

“Dale dug a hole”

Party Pete

“Tell ’em Dale”

Paulo De Tarso Duarte

Joshua Trump was taken by the Orange Baby With White Diapers to his speech at the opening of the Congress, as a special guest to be presented as an example of what they suffer… the boy suffers bullying for having the same surname as the president…

Well
I don’t know why I put this here but…
It’s about fool’s, no?… … … pool’s?

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Dogsnuts

“Custom surf hardware” aka fat fishy logs to ride there vertically challenged river wave like dribble?

Chief Hot stuff

That’s a sexy hole, dripping with brown mud

Party Pete

You’re fucked

channelbottom

I refuse to make any puns about holes.

But, here’s a WHOLE new island to go find surf spots off, and the scientist in the article has the best surf name in recent history.
‘Dan Slayback’
How rad is that?

https://www.theguardian.com…

James Bickerton

Hope he finds a few dragons or forms a death metal band ….. while picking up the dropped wallets .

mine.mine.mine

fuck them and their ponds, keep selling the dream. fuckholes

channelbottom

I’ve just closed my eyes again
Climbed aboard the dream fuckhole train
Driver take away my worries of today
And leave tomorrow behind

Oh dream fuckhole
I believe you can get me through the night
Oh dream fuckhole
I believe we can reach the morning light

mine.mine.mine

i missed a period.. ha.. now your comment carries less meaning punctuation!!!!!! i love punctuation…

channelbottom

Are you pregnant?

mine.mine.mine

ha … fucker..

channelbottom

Not in recent memory.
I’m married with kids.


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