Deliverance
Prison ain't a joke. Although the friends you do make inside are usually for life.

SUP pilot found guilty in paddle attack that left surfer brain damaged; faces seven years hard time!

Tough love in San Diego… 

Six days ago, you might’ve read about a SUP pilot who was on trial for allegedly belting a surfer in the head with a paddle at Sunset Cliffs, San Diego, on June 26, 2018.

An emergency room physician said the surfer’s injury looked like a “hammer blow.”

(Read about “Beach Bully SUP Pilot” here.)

You can now strike out allegedly.

A jury has found SUP pilot Paul Konen guilty of assaulting Kevin Eslinger. Konen faces a possible seven-year stretch in prison.

From NBC,

Prosecutors said Konen hit Eslinger on the head with a paddle so hard, that it damaged Eslinger’s brain, leading to speech problems that persist.

Deputy District Attorney Matthew Greco said the gash left on the back of the victim’s head was so severe that he could not speak for days after the incident. Prosecutors called Eslinger’s injury “highly unusual.”

Meanwhile, defense attorney Brian McCarthy argued Konen was acting in self-defense and was actually trying to get away from Eslinger. Konen allegedly told a friend he thought Eslinger “was going to kill him,” and swung at him to defend himself.

However, the prosecution said the attack was not an act of self-defense and told the jury the paddleboarder should be held accountable for the injuries suffered by Eslinger.

It don’t end there for Konen. Naturally, for this is America, Eslinger has filed a civil lawsuit against Konen, saying his impaired speech has affected his job as a swimming teacher.

What’s the takeaway, as they say, here?

For Konen it’s seven years of ass play and shivs in the guts and living in fear he’s going to be smothered every time he closes his dang eyes and a possible bankruptcy courtesy of the civil suit.

Ooowee, keep those paddles holstered, boys.

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Queen Astarte
Queen Astarte
7 years ago

God….Thats terrible. I thought SUP’s were mellow older fatties? Jeezus….poor dude. Horrific story. Don’t talk back to anyone. There’s psychos everywhere

Phat-wan kerr
Phat-wan kerr
7 years ago

Perhaps this will be the start of a soft paddle boom. @channelbottom, you are an ideas man. Can you use your laundry connections to sort out production. I think if get in now we can control the market before laird and kai have time to launch their own range. Chas can get elo to promote it.

Wayne Lunch
Wayne Lunch
7 years ago
Reply to  Phat-wan kerr

I think your right. Clearly if the paddle was soft, this incident would not have occurred.

We will always have fucktards in the line up so the only thing to keep people safe is to make the deadly weapons, non deadly.. Perhaps the SUPS could use Pool noodles instead of deadly paddles?

East of the 5
East of the 5
7 years ago

Was in Maui this week and the foils are taking over. It won’t be long now for San Diego. They are eventually going to have to designate “foil zones.” I don’t see any other outcome. Imagine paddling out in O’Side and half the foamies in the water have samurai swords strapped to the bottom….

V3 Rocket
V3 Rocket
7 years ago
Reply to  East of the 5

Surfed Noosa this morning and some ass clown was dry humping a Foil at Nationals. Maybe 200 people within 100 metres. Easter Sunday. Those things need rego plates like cars

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago
The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago

Maybe his attitude won’t be quite so cavalier once the paddle is confiscated, which it presumably will be.

Munga's Berries
Munga's Berries
7 years ago

I wonder if he’ll have to contend with a ban from CA lineups after he gets out?

Toin coss
Toin coss
7 years ago

Fuck it’d be insane to really know the actual real story. It’s true we all hate SUP’s, but what if the guy did go mad dog freak show psychopath on him at least verbally? Who knows.. I tend to still side against SUPpers on principle.

Munga's Berries
Munga's Berries
7 years ago
Reply to  Toin coss

What if he did? They’re only words.

What if he got dunked or maybe received a slap?

Does that justify wielding his paddle as a weapon?

If he were literally fighting for his life, okay, sure. Using the paddle in a defensive posture and there’s an unfortunate accident. Shit happens.

Any other scenario is criminal because he could’ve extricated himself from the situation by paddling his sorry ass on in.

Dude is a cowardly cunt.

Toin coss
Toin coss
7 years ago

The escalation story is still fuzzy. It’s a tragedy for both guys however it plays out. One guy with brain damage the other is fucked and in prison. I thought the same thing, namely that the SUP guy could have paddle away quickly if he was truly afraid. All of it is speculators at best. In these moments of fear and rage with emotion anything is very possible, with the notable exception of sound decision making. I’ve seen shit like this go down over a blown stop sign amongst otherwise friendly neighbors.

Munga's Berries
Munga's Berries
7 years ago
Reply to  Toin coss

Seems like it wasn’t fuzzy for the jury or the judge? Stiff conviction even with reasonable doubt in the mix, i.e. the SUP did the damage after Kenon fell off.

Wonder if there’s any kind of court transcript available? I’d read that.

So are you saying society should be more accepting of things that occur in the heat of the moment or just stating that shit happens in the heat of the moment?

Toin coss
Toin coss
7 years ago

I honestly considered the situation to be instructive in my own life. Aren’t we are all facing this type of scenario more frequently? It was a good reminder and Chas even mentioned “keep the paddles holstered” or something to that effect.

Otto
Otto
7 years ago

It’s like swinging an axe handle at someone laying on the ground while you’re standing over them. WTF are you worried about that person doing to you when they have no weapon in their hand?

Now let’s look again at what Jeff Clark did in Santa Cruz. It not only begs the question, “are foil boards safe to ride?”, it demands the discussion: “are foil boards such an inherently dangerous object that their presence in a line-up should be outlawed?”

Wayne Lunch
Wayne Lunch
7 years ago
Reply to  Otto

But that’s OK if they’ve dropped in.

Otto
Otto
7 years ago

The thing is it was taken all the way to trial, and a jury verdict was returned. That’s important for a couple reasons. First, it indicates either a plea deal was offered and rejected, or no plea deal was offered. Secondly, the defendant never offered to plead guilty to a lesser charge, or did and the prosecution rejected that offer. Those things considered, self-defense is the only thing he could argue. Which means he’d have to be in legitimate fear for himself because of the actions of Enslinger, AND Enslinger had the present ability to actually kill Konen. Obviously Konen, nor the testimony of Konen’s friend convinced the jury both parts. Just cause he felt Enslinger was gonna kill him is not enough.
So what does this mean going forward? If you surf prone, you have no ability to kill a SUP. AND SUP’s, they’re unnatural born killers despite whatever they might say about being “good” for society.
Are you reading this E-Lo? There’s still time. Still time for you to rehabilitate yourself and be a good thing for society. The People believe in you. We do.

samwaters
samwaters
7 years ago
Reply to  Otto

No we don’t!!!!!!

Otto
Otto
7 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

I don’t know how long you’ve been here at BeachGrit, so I’m willing to give you some latitude, and more time, to figure out what we got going on over here at BeachGrit.
If Chas, a surf journalist willing to be amongst the People, even at risk of meeting an untimely demise by Africanized Bees for us, for our sake, believes, then you best fall in line pal.

“But the damned Grumpy Local is your friend and you know it. Underneath all the Oprah, Hollywood executive, Power of Now rhetoric you are infected. Oh sure you ride a SUP and it’s as inexplicable as it is unforgivable but you left your legitimate job at a legitimate network, forsaking, no doubt, a hundred better jobs to come here.

To come to surfing.

Because you are diseased.

You are one of us, unfortunately for you, unfortunately for us. Your apple-cart-upsetting inclinations, your desire to smash the current product, is exactly right.

More opinion. More individuality. More fun. Less control.

More surfing (but not “more” as in longer competition windows… as you know).

You’re right and you’re a fucking Oprah Hollywood Laird Hamilton kook. Probably what we need, to be honest, because professional surfing don’t sell itself and begs for help. Because you feel it. Because you are deeply afflicted down the very core of your Oklahoma heart.

You are the first person from the World Surf League iteration of professional surfing to reach out, in any case, and your greatest inspiration is here.

Oh not me. I’m a kook from Oregon and not Derek, he’s from Perth, but from our Nick Carroll.

Just kidding and don’t worry, Erik. Nick knows he doesn’t belong to BeachGrit. He belongs to Kuuuurungba, or whatever shitbag blog he currently writes for but professional surfing is BeachGrit’s world and it’s time for the people who take time out of their workdays, who commit to damned professional surfing to own it.

What do they want to see? What do they want to read? Who do they want to cut from the roster?

I’m so happy we got to meet today but purely for them because, Scott Bass is a damned liar. Surfers are the best and will make this thing the thing you want.

And when we don’t?

Oh, no worries!

Fewer folk in the lineup!

Ain’t it hell to be part of a business where success counters success?

Welcome to surfing and I can’t wait to keep this conversation going.

Love,

Chas Smith”

https://beachgrit.com/2019/…

mine.mine.mine
mine.mine.mine
7 years ago

I know you boys and girls out there in the far east are just waking, but the WSL is off for the day and you might want to watch something the WSL might want to aspire to .. the NHL playoffs are pumping right now and if you follow it, every other night your team plays and every night there are multiple guys doing what Zeke wishes he could do to JJF at Bells

Bushman
Bushman
7 years ago

“He don’t like dude”……nice English?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
7 years ago

Jail sounds rapey.
Can you take the pitching role in the 1st inning?

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago

Are you a good kisser? It opens so many doors.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
7 years ago

I was till I got married
Such a waste of talent

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago

Wives are notorious kiss avoiders!

Hippy
Hippy
7 years ago

Just wait till Menopause BC…. get your fun in now amigos, trust the ol hippy….

Karl Myers
Karl Myers
7 years ago

Sounds like he’s getting what he deserves. If he caused this other guy brain damage then yeah he needs to spend time in prison. He wont serve the whole seven years. You make your bed then sleep in it.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago
Reply to  Karl Myers

Make your bed, sleep in it, get raped in it, stabbed in it. Prison is a real hoot, by all accounts. And do you think the brain injury is similar to Owen Wright’s one-in-a-million post-wipeout trauma and the man will enjoy a miraculous recovery, no side-effects etc?

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
7 years ago

Cash heals everything. Just rub it onto the affected area and it resolves instantly!

Gino
Gino
7 years ago

Great core workout

Gino
Gino
7 years ago
Reply to  Gino

SUPing I mean

Karl Myers
Karl Myers
7 years ago

The fact that he couldn’t speak after the injury is pretty telling. So no, I don’t think he will have the Owen miraculous healing. Though Owen does seem a bit more gaunt these days so perhaps he is still dealing with it. I will admit that the thought went through my mind that perhaps Owen’s injury was actually a drug OD and hence another cover up within the surf industry. Probably a false theory, but worth questioning.

Firelipe Torpedo
Firelipe Torpedo
7 years ago

And the pussification train rolls on

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
7 years ago

I wonder what craft he’ll ride upon release, maybe a lid due to an ongoing prolapsed anus issue?

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

Unless he gets to top his prison lover, in which case ass pristine.

Krill
Krill
7 years ago

*cunt act

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
7 years ago

point loma bandits > bird rock bandits

Wilbur
Wilbur
7 years ago
Reply to  dickie toledo

Nazarene Posse Loks.

Sha-wing!
Sha-wing!
7 years ago

Guaranteed this guy rehearsed in his mind smacking “kooks” with his paddle like some kind of fly swatter, but didn’t think about the possibility he might seriously mess someone up.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago
Reply to  Sha-wing!

What do you think of the law being applied with such force?

Sha-wing!
Sha-wing!
7 years ago

Eh, the possible 7 year will be brought down to 18 months with good behavior. The greater crime is the law suit. You already pressed charges, why go after the guy for $1M when you just put him in jail? Heartless…

shootsthen
shootsthen
7 years ago
Reply to  Sha-wing!

wack a hole in someone’s head and damage their brain . . . some would argue that a bit of jail time and some money is getting off easy. I’d ban that prick from the ocean, for life.

Ricoimmo
Ricoimmo
7 years ago
Reply to  Sha-wing!

the victim doesn’t “press charges”, the prosecutor decides what charges to bring.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
7 years ago

The judge rides a shortboard?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
7 years ago

What’s a chicken fried steak?
Oh ok, it’s a steak shnitzel

Munga's Berries
Munga's Berries
7 years ago

More like steak SHITzel, talk about mishandling your meat…

C4cereal
C4cereal
7 years ago
Reply to  Sha-wing!

That’s the thing, punch outs, choke outs, you walk away and usually learn something as well. Popping a hole through someones skull? Nah, fuck off. You can go to sit on ice for a while and sort out why that was a bad idea.


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