Breaking: SUP pilot gets five years behind bars for brazenly whacking man on head with paddle!

San Diego justice!

You’ve certainly followed the story of the paddle swinging SUP pilot Paul Taylor Konen and the surfer Keven Eslinger who confronted him after a breach of “surf etiquette” and don’t need a refresher but in case you do…

Paul Taylor Konen has been charged with assault with a deadly weapon for allegedly striking Kevin Eslinger in the head with a paddle, as the men were out in the water at Sunset Cliffs on June 26, 2018.

Eslinger, 56, sustained a gash to the back of his head that Deputy District Attorney Matthew Greco said fractured his skull and caused brain damage, rendering him unable to speak at all until days after the injury. Greco alleged that an emergency room physician said the injury looked “like a hammer blow.”

Well, last month a jury found Paul Taylor Konen guilty as charged and yesterday a judge sentenced him to five long years behind bars and let’s pick right up from there.

“Today is a good day for the surf community,” said Deputy District Attorney Matthew Greco, according to the station. “When people are out in the water, they are safe. The rules on land apply to the ocean.”

Eslinger, a surfing and swim coach, told the judge he still has trouble speaking as a result of his injuries, leading people to believe he’s drunk or “damaged,” the Union-Tribune reported.

“Two lives are irrevocably changed,” Eslinger said, KNSD reported. “But I feel justice was done.”

Konen’s attorney, Brian McCarthy, had earlier argued in court that his client was only trying to get away from Eslinger, who pursued him on his surfboard, the Times of San Diego reported.

“The question is did my client intentionally assault Mr. Eslinger or was there a situation where Mr. Eslinger got in front of my client’s path and got hurt?” McCarthy said, according to the publication.

But Judge Robert Trentacosta said Thursday he did not find Konen’s testimony that he feared for his life credible, the Union-Tribune reported. He also rejected a plea by McCarthy to sentence Konen to probation.

Five years is a long time to think about being a SUP pilot, sitting there behind bars. I wonder if there are SUP supremacist gangs in prison like there are white supremacist, black supremacist, hispanic supremacist, etc. ones?

I suppose I’m a shortboard supremacist.

Are you?

Should we get matching tattoos?

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Otto
Otto
7 years ago

How did the SUP surfer avoid being attacked in prison?

He agreed to be the great whites’ prey.

Party Pete
Party Pete
7 years ago

You would have loved it here this morning. 3 shortboarders were ruling what is usually a longboarders wave.

Party Pete
Party Pete
7 years ago

Probably only the fact he was a SUP pilot was permissible.

John Melba
John Melba
7 years ago

Question: do normal etiquette rules apply when long borders and sups effectively snake by going 30
Metres out and grabbing the inside every wave! My take is no because you only need to give way to people if they are playing by same rules.

Tom
Tom
7 years ago

On a better note gee it was so good to see Derek’s head on the news discussing Bob Hawke – was a real pleasure to see really well done

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
7 years ago
Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
7 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

There you go.. No liability if you get a beat down

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
7 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

I just spotted the I love noseriding picture you posted the other month… did you do that also??

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
7 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Yes. Was a bit late with that one, thought nobody saw it

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
7 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

Epic man!

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
7 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Haha, thanks! Somehow BG gets my creative juices flowing

Superworm
Superworm
7 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

Repost please, that one above is gold

Wowen Ilson
Wowen Ilson
7 years ago
Reply to  Superworm
Superworm
Superworm
7 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

You’re the baddest

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
7 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

@disqus_nEmZsdyY0S:disqus I double dare you…

OffRocker
OffRocker
7 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

New t shirt?

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
7 years ago
Reply to  Wowen Ilson

Absolutely brilliant.

Gino
Gino
7 years ago

Only one winner here, the SUP riders of the world.

We all know they enjoy sucking dick.

Eddie Haiku
Eddie Haiku
7 years ago

The rapists, killers
Fraudsters, paedos and dealers
Won’t know what hit them

C4cereal
C4cereal
7 years ago

I feel like a shortboard supremacist tattoo would in fact, have to be a dick.

slaters foot
slaters foot
7 years ago

The only group of people who do worse in prison than child diddlers are SUP “pilots”

Hippy
Hippy
7 years ago

SUP convicted for 5 years for sociopathic behavior in the lineup.

Paul Manafort, obstruction of justice, colluding with the Russians, trading data with the Russians, campaign finance crimes and a lifetime of amoral graft….. 4 years in prison.

Litmus and Chill
Litmus and Chill
7 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

So there is justice in the world.

@surfads
@surfads
7 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

At least he doesnt need an Alabama abortion.

Country’s fucked.

Hippy
Hippy
7 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

yup, capitalism killed democracy. in real time before our eyes.

LBsrfr
LBsrfr
7 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

Nope. The 4 yrs had everything to do with personal finances and nothing with the above … https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

some florida wannabee
some florida wannabee
7 years ago

THIS IS AWESOME! FUCK SUPPERS!

madmaxmedia
madmaxmedia
7 years ago

Why? It’s the best meal of the day!

some florida wannabee
some florida wannabee
7 years ago
Reply to  madmaxmedia

Can’t wait to see what happens to Tomo’s dad!

grumpy local
grumpy local
7 years ago

Well, at least his SUP skills will come in handy when he’s tasked with sweeping up the prison courtyard

OG Kronix
OG Kronix
7 years ago

What’s with the picture? Is this supposed to be a comical site?

grumpy local
grumpy local
7 years ago
Reply to  OG Kronix

Welcome, VAL!

Owen's Outgoing Tide
Owen's Outgoing Tide
7 years ago

Paul derives from the Roman family name Paulus or Paullus, from the Latin adjective meaning “small”

Taylor is a surname used in the British Isles of French and Latin origin which originated as a Norman occupational surname (meaning tailor) in France It is derived from the Old French tailleur (“cutter”).

A multitude of prestigious family names, such as the surname Konen, were formed in the lands which became the modern German state of Prussia, known for its beauty, industry and military power.

It is widely accepted that the size of a man’s penis is inversely proportionate to the length of his paddle. In this case PTK decided it would be industrious to use his quasi military instincts and enormous paddle (witnesses say at least twice as long as a regular paddle) to cut the head of a perfectly innocent and harmless shortboarder. An educator no less. “What beauty!” said PTK on seeing his victim’s blood cloud the ocean. It seems it will be PTK’s blood doing the clouding for a few years to come. Next time he tells someone he’s fearing for his life, the performance will be far more convincing.

OffRocker
OffRocker
7 years ago

Vlad the impaddler

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

For some reason I thought of Cliff Richards and his collaboration with Paul ( the small ) Speaker , I’m wired for sound ?
Wired For Sound
Cliff Richard
I like Paul speakers, I like tall speakers
If they’ve music, they’re wired for sound…….of silence

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
7 years ago

One of the fantastic artists here needs to design the shortboard supremacist tattoo. I’m very excited.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago

To keep one from going Stir Crazy , a little tune from the big house with Erland Van Lidth who played Grossberger.
https://m.youtube.com/watch…

janeausten
janeausten
7 years ago

That was great – I thought the photo was “Pyle”, so ta, Mr Bicko.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
7 years ago
Reply to  janeausten

Kubrick’s Full Metal Jacket , a much tougher film than Stir Crazy ! I couldn’t remember Stir Crazy straight away but remembered the scene and have been singing that song , badly ,making up forgotten lyrics as I go along since the 80s .

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
7 years ago

So I figure if I perforate a drop ins anus with a flicked out thruster I can claim I was blinded by their spray and was looking for an exit. Wait, what?

ricmatic
ricmatic
7 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

“Whatta ya in for?”
“Perforating an anus with my thruster”
“Come here beautiful”

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

‘Sphincter Supremacist’


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